Tina Says

Joy enjoying his evening snack on the balcony..enjoying the good weather and the rain!!!

2009-06-12T03:02:00.001-07:00

Joy woke up after his afternoon nap yesterday, to a cool breeze and lovely rain.... he yelped in excitement and danced around trying to catch the rain drops... and let the raindrops fall on his face... but soon... realisation sunk in and he turned around and looked at me and sais, " Joy sad..." with his lips all curled up in disappointment....he realised that he wouldn't be able to go down and play now....Poor chap....!!!

So he sat on the balcony with his little bowl of Muri and cheeselings... and watched the rain..... all was quiet ...for a while.. when his mommy who isn't used to the peace and quiet.. went to investigate ....found him standing and feeding all the crows and pigeons his snack,.....ocassionally spraying a few cheeselings on the people moving around downstairs.....

Joy then had to be entertained as he couldn't go out.....so his Baba kept him busy with some puzzles... but our friend prefered to do a few front rolls instead....

It's Raining....... finally

2009-06-10T03:22:00.000-07:00

The smell of wet earth is one of my all time favourite smells..... there is something about wet earth, rain, trees all squeaky clean , puddles on the street, people running helter skelter, hot samosas and pakoras and steaming hot cups of chai.....that is so romantic...

Today , we came home after a long and harrowing day at the hospital......we came back with good and positive news so were very relieved..... It seems the weather gods were also celebrating with us.....it started raining......

Everyone..went into their respective rooms and fell asleep......but I just couldn't. How could one sleep when the weather is finally gorgeous.....

So I sat on my balcony and watched the raindrops splash off the railing....drip onto my parched potted plants.....watched the brown park in front of my apartment slowly turn a bright shade of green.....watched the skies....turn from bright yellow to shades of grey ( this is the first time that grey has looked so uplifting)..... I love rain......

First hair cut.... with out making a scene...

2009-06-09T10:45:00.001-07:00

We have had our share of scenes created when people passing by have glared at me for torturing my child....passed snide comments about how they would do it themselves'at home'.....etc...etc...

But I was insistent.. Joy had to get a proper haircut... and I was not going to do it... coz i couldn't cut hair....there were hairdressers for this or barbers.... and I wasn't one....

I had also seen some of the kids in the locality after their mums and dads had had a go at their hair..... they looked hilarious , ridiculous and traumatised..

So I found a Loreal Kids Salon near where we lived which had these little toy cars and motor cycles and put on cartoons on the TV... gace kids toys to distract them etc.... The first time was great ..Joy didn't even realise that he was getting a haircut..... but the times after that.... life wasn't so easy for us... so much so .. that I refused to go with him for his haircut.. his Baba was delegated the task... the same way I have now refused to accompany him for his vaccinations... these too are his Baba's responsibility......

But this time... Joy is almost 3..... and his haircut was like it would be for any adults!!!He sat and looked at himself in the mirror...raised and lowered his head when asked.... My lil baby was growing up..... <after he finished .. he went and checked on his Baba who was getting his haircut done at the other end of the salon....

Look at Joy getting his haircut...... like a Big Boy!!!

This is the Life......

2009-06-09T10:34:00.000-07:00

Joy:"It's Oot out theyerrr.. mama!!"

Mama: "So what should we do Joy?"

Joy shows his Mama the way life should be led.... on such hot days...

Option 1: Lounge in the Lazyboy and eat chocolates

Option 2: Lounge in the lazyboy, eat chocolates and watch cartoons in an AC room

Option 3: Go for a swim

Option 4: Go for a swim...

Option 5: Call friends over, sit in an AC room and persuade an auntie to read a story to you..... "Yay!! Story Time"

Making Paddle Pops

2009-06-09T10:24:00.000-07:00

Joy is lucky to have some cousins who live in the same complex as us.... and he idolizes them.. as they are a few years older than him.... natural thingy....

Since everyone is on vacation... I decided to make ice lollies... or as i was informed by the brood... they are called "Paddle Pops".... actually it was Joy who told me they were called that.. he it seems has seen it on Mickey Mouse Play house...

So this is what we did....

1) We mixed water with orange squash....

2) Then we stirred it and poured it into the moulds that I had picked up on a trip to London....

3) Then each of them got a chance to pick their favourite colour and and we sealed the moulds and put them into the freezer..

4)The brood collected again the next afternoon... to see if their experiment was successful.

5) And what a rollickin time they had..... a finger lickin... messy.... paddle pop time....

Balls....Balls

2009-06-09T10:16:00.000-07:00

With the weather being what it has been in Delhi and Gurgaon over the past few weeks.... it is criminal to send kids down to play in the park.... so what do harrassed mums like me do....????

We seek refuge in the play areas in air conditioned malls..... the kids love it.. and so do the moms... specially .. if there is a Baristaa... and a book store near by...

In The ball area..

In a little toy car....navigating his way aorund the play area

2009-06-09T03:57:00.000-07:00

Some of Joy's Art and Craft work....

Insects in the garden.....catterfinnner and wadybug...

Catterfinner hiding in the grass....with Mr. Sun and Mr. Twee and caaowds in the back ground

Mr. Giraffe eating gween gween gwass...and oh... Mr. Giraffe's skin colour is Onjus....it seems... LOL>..

Joy- ful Summer of 2009

2009-06-07T15:09:00.000-07:00

This summer has been a hot one....not just weatherwise... but also activity wise...
Joy and I have had a great time.... this year... also because he is now at an age when he is talking and talking and wanting to do things all the time...
It does get a little tiring,,, but has been fun....
A lot of our friends have sent their kids off to summer camp, due to work constraints or other reason... and let me tell you I have thought about doing so myself a few times.. when Joy is driving me a little around the bend.... but am glad I haven't.
Joy and I went to Kolkata for a short trip and got thoroughly pampered....we would have ideally liked his baba to have been with us as well.... but since...Baba is very busy and we hardly get to see him on normal days we decided it was better to take ourselves off to another city and see other people instead.

Joy at the station

Even before going on the , since April, Joy and I have been going swimming everyday at this delightful club we are members of. It is just across the road from our condo... and we enjoy ourselves a lot here... it has a little old world charm to it...and great food and good entertainment...

Joy has started swimming- well almost- he refuses to swim in the toddler pool anymore and jumps into the bigger pool after he sees me get in.
We have spent a lot of time in the water and its been great fun...Joy's baba gets to hear all about our exploits every evening and we can see that look in his eyes.. of " aaw!! I wish I was there too...." ( we wish the same too baba!!)
But he makes up for it by joining us on weekends and then treating us to a good breakfast after the swim...

My lil waterbaby!!

Joy has been enrolled in a play school... a school I wish I could go to....called "Anand"...close to home... a fabulous place with lots of area and an energetic bunch of teachers.... and small numbers....a place we picked after a lot of deliberation and thought....
The school asked us to try and maintain a scrapbook about Joy and his summer holidays, which we have been doing..
Joy and I have had the most amazing time sprawled on the floor with craayons and colours, drawing.....scribbling and doodling......we have done some interesting art and craft work, creating things to illustrate stories that Joy likes....specially about his " caterfinner" and how it's hiding in the grass and about a "giraffe who ate green leaves" and about " Catterfinnners and Radybugs who live on twees and reaves".....( yes Joy can't say 'l' and replaces it with 'r' and 'w' on and off)....watching back to back videos of Barney, dancing to "partridge in a pear tree", mimicking each other....ODing on "sausages and woodles...".....playing tag in the park( when the weather permits).... listenning to my little 2 something year old pleading me not to send him to the park....as " eets hot theewrw..mama!" and telling me innocently " mama..let's go Swoimming"...even if we already went in the morning....

Play dough fun!!

Craft Work

Shredding paper

My little boy is growing up... though he is still driving us bonkers with his terrible twos..... he is growing up....
if he sees me hurt (specially after he has jumped on me)... or if I look upset about something....he rushes upto me and holds my face in his grubby little hands and looks into my eyes and asks " you ok mama????" " Arni ( arnica) chayi???" and gives me a kiss on the lips and again asks... " you ok????"
Awwww.... I would melt.....initially.....feeling instantly better.... but off late.. he has started roll playing a little,...
so after " you ok?".... he goes on to " Joy Doctor hobe??? and acts as though he is putting on his stethoscope... and starts jabbing me with his little fingers,...in the eye, in the nose .. in the stomach..... and if his baba is around... he gets jabbed in unmentionable places as well....

We have been entertaining quite a bit as well.... have had friends and relatives over for dinner, to stay and have been eating out a lot....
I have read five books since the start of my vacation and not even one of them has anything remotely to do with work.....
I suddenly realised that I had read any of the John Grisham.... so have burried myself in my brother's collection.....The Husband has been more than happy to get me a few more and someothers...we have spent a number of hours quietly snuggled in bed , with the AC on full blast, Joy asleep.....reading and soaking in the peace.... a blissful way to spend a hot and horrible summer day.....

I have been experimenting with interesting food... so have been trying to make some different food for the husband for dinner...poor guy is such a foodie and used to love it when I cooked..... but now I have become too lazy to cook and the maid is a fabulous one...so have let her take charge....

Joy and I still have a month of vacation left before both of us go back to school.....and are looking forward to the next few days as we have Joy's Dadu and Dadi visiting us for a week.......

What fun!!!

A trip to Cal...and Aila....yeh kya hua??

2009-06-07T14:31:00.000-07:00

This summer I was determined to visit Cal and take Joy to meet his aunts and uncles and granduncles and grandaunts and great grand moms from his Baba's side...
This was our first trip to Cal after two years and Joy had grown and his grandparents who had visited regularly over the past couple of years were dying to show him off and I had a long list of shopping to do......so.... not much persuasion was required.... LOL!
We decided to take the train so that Joy could experience something different.... so off we went ... Joy, My mom ( who was going shopping for my brother's wedding), the maid and I.

Joy watching the luggage at the station

The train journey was t-r-a-u-m-a-t-i-c!!!!! Joy did not sit down for even a minute....he was either hanging upside down, or dangling from the railing or switching the lights on and off....or doing his favourite... JUMP JUMP!!!!...
I understand ... he was enjoying himself.. and curious that he is .... was eager to discover all he could....BUT..... there is a limit to all of that as well!!!

I had gone all prepared with things to keep him occupied..... it was great to see him wanting to play a little memory card game and playing it the proper way and not just... his own way....
We had taken a number of his books for him to read and also some new ones...so we also did a lot of story time...but soon my mom and I had parched throats reading and re reading his books....

We took his food along but ...ahem... all he wanted was chips and milk.... so naturally...just when we had all settled down to sleep... he sat up...as he was sharing my berth ...and announced... "Mama... Bomi...!!!" ( Mama... puke!!)
So there I was cleaning him and everything around us... the railway staff by this time were drunk and incoherent.... and this was the Rajdhani,.... ( remind me never to have these bright ideas of travelling by train again with a toddler)

Anyway, after 17 hours of my wanting to throw Joy out at each of the stations and also contemplating jumping out at Dhanbad,.. we finally reached Cal..and were greeted by Joy excited Dadu....
It was great to see Joy recognise him and hug him and then hold his hand and walk towards the car.... ( without even once looking back at his hassled and traumatised entourage)

Joy had a blast in Kolkata... he did what ever he wished and my mother- in-law and Joy's Abudi ensured that his routine , which I am very particular about was also followed.

Joy relaxing and watching TV at 'Dadi House'

He met all his Dadus and Dadis and Kakus and Pishis in Kolkata and also his favourite 'Shomaana' ( The husband's grandmother- she is my favourite too)
Joy was kept occupied with visits to relatives houses, playing in the park, being taken to all the parks near by and also some TV . In the evenings his Dadu and Dadi would take him to the club where he would freak out in the play area....

Joy at Saturday Club

What was I doing ....while he did all this ??...LOL...
I was out shopping ...
And did I shop!!!! From going sari shopping and picking up some fabulous ad unique saris to wear for my brother's wedding, to going jewellery shopping, to scouting Gariahat market for reasonable and everyday wear saris and stuff.... to taking the maid out shopping ..I did everything.....!!
I also sampled rolls , biryani to my hearts content.....
Then something happened.....
Aila.... yes the cyclone that hit Kolkata and other parts of West Bengal happened.... and We were right there....

Monkey Joy...watching the rain.... and the Aila

I was flooded by smses and phone calls from friends and family to ask if we were ok.... well we were ..just about I should say.... but the poor city wasn't..
Over 600 trees were uprooted....and these trees were old trees with neverending roots....trees so old that I am sure each of them had a story to tell...
All the billboards and hoardings on top of buildings came crashing down..... there was chaos on the streets and traffic jams.....windows crashing.....oh god!! it was bad....
what was I doing during the cyclone....???
This is an sms I got from my brother at 12pm on the day of the cyclone:
"Aila... sis!!! the news says the govt. has everyone to stay indoors... let me guess... you are out shopping!!!!????"

ahem...!!! He knows me too well.. I was out alone collecting all my saris from the different shops......The poor driver who had been bullied into taking me was the one who suffered the most... the car was rattling due to the wind.... he had to weave his way around the narrow and some unknown streets of Kolkata.... in my father-in-law's expensive car....to make me get to my aunts house where I had been invited for lunch.....avoiding hundreds of fallen trees and also some that missed us very narrowly.....

Anyways I finally reached my aunt's house and spent a few hours eating fingerlicking good Bong food... with the windows rattling and wind gushing in the back ground.....then again at around 3pm, when there was a lull in the cyclone, my aunts, my mum and I went out shopping again... ( yes... we are crazy)....out to the jewellers and to a bag shop... where we went berserk.....!!!!

Joy at his Paka didu's ( my aunt's place..) having a swingin time

On the whole.. we had a great trip and the return journey on the Rajdhani wasn't so bad... Joy was a little mellow since he had satiated his curiosity on the way to Kolkata....but that didn't stop him from running up and down the compartment with the maid...at his heels....

When we reached New Delhi station we were quite happy to be back again..... specially since we were all happy...after a good trip, good food, lots of pampering, truck loads of shopping ......oh! and a rockin.. cyclone...

Hats off to medical science and doctors and BAPI!!!!

2008-11-29T19:54:00.000-08:00

My FIL has just come home after a major surgery... We as a family have had a traumatic 5 months... The Husband's Dad was diagnosed with a tumor of the bad type in his lungs... the entire family was shattered.....for the past 5 months... all we have being doing is rounds of the hospital and doctors... loads of medication.... consultations.... chemos... and what not..... last monday... He was operated upon... and the dreaded tumor.. removed.. they had to remove one section of the lung.....the doc showed us the removed organ... it was BIG.... anyways we were all relieved...
My FIL was shifted back to his room the day after the surgery,..... and I walked in during visiting hours to find.. him exercising.... I almost collapsed... was someone just out of a major surgery supposed to stretching his arms... and taking a walk.....???????
My anxious must have shown in my eyes.. when my MIL... gestured that she had had the same feeling and reaction when the doc had arrived to make FIL do his exercises... but it seems.. thats how things need to be now... I saw the incision cut on my FILs back it was about 3 inches...yes.. thats all...
We expected the doctors to keep him in hospital for at least a week if not more.... but.... wednesday we were told that they may discharge him on saturday,.,,, then they sent a message that maybe friday.... thankfully my MIL was able to convey to them... that we were in no hurry... and that they should release him not before Saturday.....
So yesterday he came hom looking better than before... he is his normal self... sitting in the study.. playing his beloved... MAHJONG on my laptop....calling his Office in Cal.... chatting with his friends...
It is taking us sometime time to get used to him being home... we seemt o be the cautious ones... reminding him to see what he is eating..... he wants to go to favourite Galleria.... and we look helplessly at each other....
We had some relatives over yesterday who came to see him and were stunned to see him walk out of the study and shake their hands and heartily laugh at their jokes.. and gossip....
Every now and then.. they would ask if he would like to go and rest and he laughed them off.. asking them to sit a while longer and do 'adda'.... he was enjoying himself....
Today.... I have to go to work.... yes..it is Sunday... and we have a adventure sports carnival in school... I don't mind it... I went last eyar and it was wonderful.... the lawns of the school looked lovely and loads of stuff for kids to do... and a lovely sunny day and good grub... ideal... this time the Husband is incharge of Joy and we have some friends.. who have said they would join us ....So I asked my MIL come along and see the school where I work and where her grandson would study in couple of years... and was surprised to hear "I will come too... and I think we shal lunch at the stalls there"....from Bapi.....
My MIL had an exasperated look and I just smile... it was good to have him back......
Hats off to you Bapi....... we wouldn't have made it through these few months if it weren't for you.....and your positivity and will power......
HATS...OFF to YOU and .... MEDICAL SCIENCE ......and DOCTORS who save lives!!!!!

Rubbish rantingss

2008-11-20T16:36:00.000-08:00

Have been going mad off late what with work and family issues and the biggest problem of all....'my being a perfectionist!!!!'

I need to have my house in order... I need to have my tea served to me in my Tea service...I need to have the plants rotated....I need to have the bed linen changed every week even if it hasn't been slept on.... I need to plan the daily menus... I need to clean out and rotate Joy'c closet every two weeks....I need to pack The husband's bag everytime he goes on tour.... I need to keep up with all my relatives and friends....I need to make fresh fruit juice every morning....

I know.. I sound like a freak....but that's the way I am.... and all I have written is just on the home front.... you should see me at work.....

One day a friend came upto me and commented... "I wonder how you are still sane?.... ?

That got me thinking..... 'Am I really insane?.....Am Ion the verge of a nervous break down...? If yes.. then I have no one to blame but myself...."

It's not that I don't delegate..... I do..... but if things are not done the way I want them to be done... It irritates me no end..... so I usually hang around to supervise.....

One person.... who completely throws me off balance... is a two foot... little tornado........

He just stands in front of me with his hands on his hips...( wonder where he learnt that!) and says ," Naaaaa!"....then if I glare at him.... he folds his chubby little arms in front of him ...thrusts his little red lips into a pout... and walks away in a huff...looking for sympathy elsewhere in the house..... nowadays there are lots of people to give him sympathy....

Looking at him... one day the husband... mentioned... that he wished he had could also act like his son... when I acted like Hitler at home...but I do know... that everything aside.. he quite likes the way his household functions... he is quite proud when people compliment him on the way we entertain....and the house looks....he actually agrees with my 'fundas' of discipline....

We have a clear understanding..... He doesn't interfere with the everyday functioning of the household......and we don't talk shop at home......

accha... this post isn't really a post... its just letting off some steam.. and some erratic thoughts... no sense... I just re read what I have written.. and its rubbish....

so I think I am going to change the title of this ... to rubbish ranting.....

Will write another post tomorrow about Joy and his Abudi,..... as well as Joy and his talking 120 to the dozen....and a few more thought out posts.... that are more meaningful...

After a long time....

2008-11-15T06:07:00.000-08:00

Yes... its been a long time... I just checked the date on my last post which was Dec, 2007..... so it has been A LONG TIME....
Have been busy... more like going crazy....life has been giving me its share of ups and downs..... but am a survivor.... and I shall survive...
The joy of my life......My lil Joy isn't anymore a little bundle of joy..... but...now an extremely active child... a toddler.. who doesn't know the meaning of the word...."stay put"....
He loves to go down to the 'paart'....(park)....and do 'dol...dol' ( swing) and the Scheliiiide( slide) and 'Jaaaamp' ( jump) and 'baaounce' ( bounce)......he runs faster than a hare... and it is truly a task to get your hands on him.....
He looks like a mirror image of his Dad.... his complexion , and weird and uncanny similarities give me the hibijibies....however...
he has got one thing from me.... he has gotten my temper....( good lord!!...) or more like the temper I used to have....
Work... has been rewarding and fulfilling .... one of the things that have kept me going....
now am back.......here,.... and i intend to stay....

The Weekend..

2007-12-04T06:35:00.000-08:00

We have had quite a hectic weekend....
What with wedding season on... and the entire world deciding to get married on those very same days.... one tends to be rushing from one wedding to another....

In the past few weeks , we have attended three big weddings.. all of which were very nice... we took Joy to two receptions and have learnt our lesson....
He stays at home... from now on....
He though had a blast... can't say the same for his Baba.... who was running behind him ....preventing him from lunging at the lovely.. warm sigris.... stopping him from diving into the freezing waterfalls... and what not....
Though we have learnt one thing.... just carry his nosey wipes and a bottle of water and warm milk... and we are ready to go.... and of course a few diapers....
he eats everything and anything now....
Joy seems to have a particular liking for Chiken Malai Tikka.... he can eat inumerable quantity of those... as well as fried fish... so I guess we are ready for any trip anywhere....

On Sunday... we took Joy for a small picnic.... we do so otherwise as well... and did a lot of it last year.....if people remember reading my blog then....
so this time as well we went to our favourite Lodi Garden.... and were surprised to be joined by a few friends... and their babies as well....
There was this lovely plan of going to Kuchchesar...the Mud Fort.... which is about two hours away.... but I had the feeling the husband would not be very enthusiastic... about the long drive considering he drives for almost two hours everyday to work and back..... and sure enough...he refused.... So I told our other friends to go ahead.....
The husband and I have this plan of visiting all the Neemrana properties....( i think every one has somekind of quirky dream... and the husband and I share one.... as well... we love the high life.. we love.... plush resorts and hotels... and love fine dining ..which is why we seem to be broke as well...) We have already done one fo the Neemrana properties.... we did Pataudi last year and are doing Neemrana Fort on the 3-4 th of Jan... and are very excited about it...So we have been eyeing Kesroli and Kuchchesar as well... as they are close by... ( kuchchesar now ceases to be a Neemrana .... don't know why though).....anyways .. So the Husband has assured me that we shall go there soon as well.... there are such good deals on... sometimes....

We went as I was saying for our picnic.. with some tossed up macaroni and oranges and some juice... two other couples .. also joined us... making the picnic quite exciting with garam kachoris and sandwiches and soem hot spicy chai from a local guy there...
The kids had a blast.... they climbed up little hillocks... rolled down the sides.... played with a ball... chomped on the yummy food.... lay in the grass and napped.. drank their milk.. all while... us adults.. soaked in the sun and caught up on senseless and inane conversation....
There was laughter all around...
It was great watching Joy play with his two friends... Leela and Vidipta... Leela.. who is a little older.. had this protective attitude.. when Joy tripped and fell down ..she tried to clean his hands with a wet wipe... so cute... and also walked after him... to keep an eye on him....( she is just a year older than Joy...) and Joy and Vidipta... went through this round of huggies...and swaying to us humming to them.... Joy ran around like a maniac.... exhausting his poor Baba....

We finally returned back to my mothers place at around 4 in the evening and then after a cup of tea.. drove back to Gurgaon.... The Husband and I have now started enjoying our drive back hom together..we chat... joke... and try and save the car stereo.... from being smashed ..when Joy is awake... or sing along if he isn't... lol..
We reached home torealise we hadn't picked up our months provisions... so we dropped Joy and the maid off.. and went to get that over with....
A friend of The husband's... came over at night and we all went out to dinner to this really cozy Thai diner... close by ..the food was fabulous....came back with a doggy bag......:- )

The Husband is off on tour... and will be gone for a week.. am completely swamped with work at school... so I really don't think I will notice the time flying.... Joy keeps me on my toes when I come home every afternoon.... but I am loving it....

Joy's first birthday....

2007-09-29T08:39:00.000-07:00

I will begin by refusing to apologize and refusing to promise to be more regular....why? coz I stink at both....
So here is a post that I had drafted in September and never got round to publishing it...
This is a pictoral post on Joy's first birthday.... Yes!!!!! I know it's almost December.... but well...

Joy in his lil diaper and Genji.... sitting next to ornaments and clothes bought for Bal Gopal by his D'shona... these were to be offered to the God on the 6th of September,Joy's first birthday...

The Bal Gopal wearing everything on Joy's birthday.

Joy trying to open the Mandir's gate..looks like he wanted to have a lil chat with the Bal Gopal.

Joy was quite convinced that he had the right to ride on Nandi's back.. it took sometime for everyone to get him off..

6th September - Joy's 1st birthday!!!!

We had a small family do at home and his closest friends the Brat and lil Bean came to visit him with MadMomma and the OA. Joy was also lucky to have his Dadu bhai, Nammi and Shona Ma here from Kolkata and his D'shona, Mamu and Boro Didu here as well... he was thrilled to bits when he saw his favourite Bharat Mamu as well..

Joy cutting his cake with his Baba and Ma..

Eating his first piece of cake...

Lil Beanie...

Joy and the Brat....huggies...

The day of the BIG BASH

8th September 2007.

Venue: Pizza Hut.

We arrived early ..so Joy had a field day sprawling himself on the air balls....

This is what the place looked like when we entered the venue

This is what it looked like when the Khoi Bag was burst....

Random pictures from the party....

The food...

Joy fell asleep in the middle of his party.... poor chap was exhausted...

And.. This is my favourite picture from the party.... The Three of Us....

I apologise......

2007-09-29T08:37:00.000-07:00

I apologise for disappearing from the face if this earth...... but am back... and plan to be here ..I hope more regularly....

Happy Birthday Joy baby!!!

2007-09-07T18:55:00.000-07:00

My baby has turned one.... I haven't had access to the internet for a week now...and no time to do anything but organise my life for the shift...
Now we have shifted and are settled in.... My In-laws came in to celebrate Joy's first birthday with us and got us an extra gift the Husband's grandmother as well... Joy's great grand mother...My favourite person in the husband's family.....
Joy could not have asked for a better and more precious present.....and nor could I...I wish she could have visited us earlier and am also missing Dadubhai....wish he was here too....

Joy's birthday was on the 6th of September. He is now officially 1 year and two days old... I don't know what to write about my baby.... only this... I love you darling.....and am so glad that we had you.... its been the best decision of our lives and am glad our wish came true.....

Your Ma will write a better post once all the celebrations are over and she gets some more time to sit and pen her thoughts and feelings....but untill then.....I leave you with two beautiful posts written ...... one by your Baba and one by your Mashi...

Also two posts done by his parents when he was born....mine and his Baba's

Happy Birthday.... my sweetheart..

Thank you !!! but no thanks!!

2007-08-28T06:47:00.001-07:00

Potty training.....

I am being congratulated by everyone .... about the feat I have accomplished.....well.... both the Husband and I are a little embarrassed.... receiving all the praise.... coz.....we didn't do anything.... WE DID NOT POTTY TRAIN our son.....we never wanted to.....we don't believe in it....

But...stillll......It happened... just like that...

I have written about it in just the previous post to this one....so will not repeat the story again...

The husband and I have been going crazy with all the advice people have been giving us ... about how it was the most essential thing for us to do......"Train him.".. "Potty train him" "..... not potty trained yet..... tsk tsk...."

There was a time when I would be told all this.... being the mother it is naturally understood that all these tasks are mine to undertake..... so whenever I was cornered into listenning to a lecture... I would see the husband looking over their shoulders.... motioning me to count to ten and back.....

What I could never understand was .." what it was to them.. if my son was potty trained or not...?"

The poor guy is not even one year old... give him a break....puhleese.....!!!!

And while you are at it give us one too....we deserve it....

Here are some pics of Joy doing potty.....( I know he will hate me for this one later.... but.. what the hell!!)

Joy on the pot

Joy and his mommy.....potty time is bonding time...

Countdown

2007-08-23T09:56:00.000-07:00

A week to go before we move to Gurgaon..... and as I have always mentioned... My life can never be simple..... even if it seems simple..... something or the other happens to make things difficult.

Well , now that I am working I have certain professional responsibilities as well... I teach ..hence I am responsible towards my students and the organisation.....

So..anyways... The school follows a policy of having "form evenings"( all the sections within a class make up a form)....and the school believes that it is better to have form evenings ..so then all the children get a chance to participate properly...and not just end up becoming trees or clouds etc...and I was so happy to see each and every child so involved in their "item" for the evening and practising hard.....
SO basically to come back to how my life is all tooooo complicated .. this form evening is on the 31st and will carry on till around 8 pm.... after which I can't leave till all the kids in my class are picked up by their parents or gaurdians.... so there is no way I can get home till around 10 pm.....
The next morning at 8 am the packers arrive.... so no chances of me getting a break.....
Anyways am just waiting to get this whole shifting business over and done with.... the drive back and forth from Gurgaon is now something I have gotten used to.... I have another sweet colleague who does a car pool with me....so we caht all the way going and coming..... but both of us are still just waiting to move....( she moves next month as well).....
We have suddenly found a lot of our friends moving into Gurgaon..... can't complain... won't complain....actually I will just Whoooooop!!!! in joy!!!! What fun...

5 teeth... peek -a -boo ...tooki... and potty tra......

2007-08-20T03:54:00.000-07:00

It's been ages.... I know... but what to do... I am guilty.... and I have no one to blame but myself.

I have been in the middle of a very hectic month at work.... plus a lot of activity at home.. what with relatives visiting...organising and coordinating with the packers and movers.. etc.... changing addresses all over..... subscriptions, bank accounts, gas conections, broadband and worldspace and whatnot.... am going around like a person who is on the verge of a breakdown..... so today I decided to come home early... got a lift with a colleague...came home to find Joy fast asleep....so suddenly realised I had a few minutes to myself.....

I am sitting and typing this hoping I will be able to write a few lines before Joy wakes up and demands his Mommy time....

Joy will be a year in a few days....we shift to Gurgaon on the 1st.... my inlaws come in to visit from the 3rd and celebrate Joy's birthday with us....am glad they are being able to do so....

They are also bringing with them my most favourite person in their family... the husband's grand mother..... she is a darling.... am looking forward to her being here with us...

Am also glad that the husband's parents will be here for a week after we shift so they can help us settle in comfortably and also be at home with Joy for the first week in the new house.... I have to work two days that week....so am feeling good.

Joy has got 5 teeth....three on top and two on the lower gum.... he is still chewing and gnawing everything within reach .. my index finger has started looking like a shrivelled "bhindi"...

I have taken a photograph of him finally showing one tooth....will upload as soon as the husband manages to do so....

He is also babbling a lot now.. Joy rewarded his Pishi over the phone with a series of babbling sounds... and both of them had quite a conversation....

Joy has also started eating proper food.. yesterday he ate paneer and chawal .....and is also munching on roti with butter and cheeni and toast with the same as well... I think he likes the crunchy texture of the sugar against his gums..

We take Joy to the park every evening... and his latest is to want to climb up the slide......instead of sliding down....he also loves the monkey bars... and hangs as if he was born to do just that....even attempts pull ups.... trying to get the bar between his teeth and it honestly takes all my strength to keep him from being successful.

Joy's latest game with his Ma is tooki.... yes ...the same old game .. it's been his favourite since day one.... but now since he is crawling all over... he and his ma play this game all over the house.... however ... its like when a kid plays cricket and only wants to bat..... well.. in his game of Tooki..... Joy only wants to go seek.... Ma has to go and hide.... its been great fun... every day after work.. Joy and I play this game for almost an hour.... both of us are pooped by the end of it.... I am ready to drop... and can eat an elephant after the session.. and Joy drops off to sleep after all the exercise and his dinner and bath..... So I get to eat in peace and he sleeps ......peacefully....not bad na....???/( except for all the extra Kgs I am putting on thanks to the extra food)

Ok.. the last bit on his update is the most important and I have left it for the last....

Joy now sits on the "big potty".... as in the potty seat on the big potty and does his potty every morning. Yes I know.... YIPPPPPPEEEEEEE!!!!

My mom has been driving me mad the last few months about potty training him and I have written as well about it ..and how I refused to potty train anyone...he will learn it as and when he needs to....

On 15th August... yes I chose the date.... lol... no really it just happened ....coincidence... we were home and in the morning...Joy was making faces as if he was about to do his potty.... so I jumped up and got the potty seat out from the the drawer under the bed.. it was still in its plastic wrap..... ( all this time Joy was still attempting the potty business)and ran and put it on the potty and then ran to grab Joy before he does the job and got him undressed.. and everything... but I guess all the excitement must have stopped the motion for the lil fella... lol.... so.. that was that... the husband rolled around in laughter watching my craziness...

However , that very afternoon.... Joy was sleeping next to me... when I noticed him squirming in his sleep.. making faces.. like he does before his potty.... so I again picked him up and made him sit on his potty seat... he can sit now.. so was quite ok sitting and holding on to the handles... plus I think he just was feeling too potty to know what was happenning..... so it happened.... I was thrilled....even cleaning him was pretty easy with the potty shower... he loves the tickling feeling against his lil bummy...

The next day...I felt him squirm early in the morning at around 5 .30 am again.. now that is the time he usually wakes up ...so I made him sit on the pot again..... and success.... its been 5 days now and it has become a routine.... so no training was required.... it just happened....

and am glad...!!!

OK..... I hope to be able to write a little more often once we move to Gurgaon..... since I wont have any commuting to do... so will be a little more relaxed.... I shall also try and upload a number of photographs....

untill then......

Joy's 11th month birthday!!!

2007-08-13T09:46:00.000-07:00

Ok!! so I have been a horrible mom.... Joy's 11th month birthday came and went and the husband and I just about managed to hug and kiss him before running off to work....

I came home to find.. a lil package dropped off by his beloved D'shona.... a set of 5 sleeveless vests in various colours.... and a Fisher Price toy..... and His Mamu had bought him a huge drum..... I smiled when I saw all this.... ok!! so we didn't get him anything.... but others remembered.....

Joy has been happily dragging his drum all over the house.... and making the most amazing racket... so much so that over the weekend I had to confiscate the drum sticks... not so much because of the noise... but the fear of him hitting himself....
Anyways.... he has suddenly takena liking for sitting on his drum.. as in using it as a stool... lol.. looks quite cool and cute as well...( I would have taken some pics and uploaded them... but we are having serious Connectivity problems... even the husbands Lap top is playing up..so .. I shall post them as soon as I can.
I finally managed to open my net today and have found an email from Joys Nammi... with her monthly birthday poem....
here it is ......

Little Joy our life’s big exlixir

You’ve given us 11 months of happiness & laughter

Waiting impatiently to see you lite & blow your first candle

With it Nammi & Dadu would make endless wishes for their little bundle

- Be a man strong like Mother Earth and big hearted like the Sky

- May the Fire within help to ignite & inspire you always to a new high

- Let the beautiful Wind blow favourably & help you keep smiling

- Like the Water (and your Father!) remain cool, severe and forever progressing!

Anyways...
am now going nuts organising Joy's first birthday party.... we want to do it ona smaller scale.... as it is we have had two huge parties for everyone in both Delhi and Kolkata.... and everyone has wished us and loaded us with gifts and useful stuff.. for Joy.... its embarrassing to accept gifts again in such quick succession.... so we are only calling close family... and friends and cousins with kids..
we have 39 adults and 11 kids.... I know its not a small number.... but compared to our usualy dos it is .....
Went and booked the venue yesterday..... so at least that is done...
Anyways.... my darling baby.. happy 11th month birthday.... belated though it is...
the next one will be for your first year... and after this I shall only refer to your age in terms of years ....my gosh is time flying....

First tooth...finally

2007-07-28T05:40:00.000-07:00

I have been going on and on and on about how Joy hasn't yet got his first tooth...well.... a few days back.. I suddenly felt something very very sharp cut my finger which was being chewed on by Joy....

I pulled out my finger and saw some little marks on it amidst all the drool...

I was thrilled... I immediately pried Joys mouth open.... yes I had to pry it open.. he just wouldn't let me check... which is really hilarious coz.. otherwise... his mouth is always open....all his pictures have his mouth open .

When I finally managed to peer into his mouth I saw two little white thingys in there.... one was out and very very sharp and the other was also almost there....

Yippppeee.e... my baby had finally gotten his teeth....!!!

I felt a little sad as well thinking he wouldn't give me his famous toothless smile any more....but ..well... am glad the teeth are out.. poor chaap has been struggling with them.....

I am also sorry about no picture proof... coz he is just refusing to keep his mouth open long enough for me to click a pic...

Will do so as soon as I can and upload..

Curls

2007-07-28T05:18:00.000-07:00

The other day I was chatting with Joys pishi.... when I mentioned that Joy had inherited my curls.. much to my despair.....I hate..ok hate that much but don't like my curls that much......the only time I am very happy to have them is when I hear people have spent millions getting perms or curls done to their hair.....I have been born with natural curls.... at any point of the day or night .... the lower part of my hair hangs in ringlets.... yes.. the kind you get after putting curling irons in your hair..... I have been told I am blessed.....

But...

I guess the grass is always greener on the otherside....I on the other hand pay millions to get my hair straightened.... I have done it all... straightening irons, blow drys, combing my hair for hours.. even hang things from the ends to have them stretch out.....everything.....even had them chemically straightened....

My brother too has been blessed with curly hair.... and he has a weekly appointment with the barber to trim it so that it doesn't start curling upwards..... he hates it too.....

So the minute both of us noticed that Joy has inherited the curls... we looked at each other and sighed.... here goes a few more millions....

But I must say Joy looks adorable with his locks... they are soooo cute.... he has his trade mark two curls which are like lil horns on two sides of his head... and now at the back he has two rows of curls.... he doesn't have a very thick growth..but yes.... they curl alright....

check them out....

Joy's curls....don't miss the shadow against the wood

A close up...

Update

2007-07-27T21:47:00.001-07:00

I have been warned by members of my family that if I don't update my Joy Updates regularly.....they will kill me.....so... this post is for THEM!!!

Joy is a big boy now.... he will be a year in a lil over a months time,....(which reminds me I need to organise his birthday party)

Joy has become very "dushtu...."...there is no other word for it....He is just very very "dushtu"...

He is standing up holding on to every and anything......even his Baba's hair ( on the leg)..which is very very painful for his Baba...and the other day I saw his Mamu wince..when he was given the same treatment....

His sweet Mamu however....said....well he is growing up..so what if it is by holding on to my body hair..... let him..lol.... his Baba however....was not so kind....

The husband's latest name for Joy is Partner....yes he is a big Govinda and Salmaan Khan fan...lol.....

Very often I find lil Joy sitting at his fathers feet and getting a "Listen Partner " talk..with his Baba telling him a few facts of life..... and my darling Joys answer is always the same...."pppffffttttssss" with drool all over his face..at the end of the lecture...very cute..am going to capture it on video as soon as I can....

Joy also now refuses to be carried... he has to be let down on the floor and then he just rushes all over the place crawling like a maniac....yanking things off their shelves... his favourite spot is his Ganga Mashis puja area..... the poor gods are always in the danger of being toppled over....

He is babbling all day... most of the sounds are Baabaa....and naanaa...but still no Ma..or Maamaa....am still waiting...

Some pics :

Joy after toppling over Ma's bangles

Joy sitting in his stroller on a visit to San Marzano for lunch

Potter mania....

2007-07-21T21:28:00.000-07:00

To make things clear even before I write my post.... I Don't read Harry Potter...I never have ..and I don't think I ever will.....

Ok!! So everyone knows my stand... If you don't agree please don't read further....If you are ok with it..read on.....

So..as I said..I don't read Harry Potter...I must admit I tried...it was difficult not to when the only other person you live with goes into a self imposed "coventry" ....So not being too much of a TV person and coz I love to read ..I tried to read one of the previous books.....couldn't go past page 27....May be I just don't get this genre of fiction .....or whatever.....I Don't read Potter....

After marrying the husband... I learnt that there were somethings we had to do together.... I mean if he could accompany me to watch "Maid in Manhattan"( quite a bad choice on my part I know)..I could go with him and sit through a few hours of Potter.....So since 2003 I have watched every Potter movie made....and have forgotten what I saw the minute I walked out of the theatre....

I have had to sit through hours of discussions and analysis and future predictions done by the husband and his Potter crazy friends....and wondered...what was so great about this little specky guy..and his friends with weird names .....

This year, the husband asked his mother-in-law to give him the new Harry Potter instead of new clothes for Jamai Shoshti and she obliged....He booked it on one of those online stores who promise to have it delivered the same day it hit the stores and gave him some discount as well...anyways...I was quite amazed with all his planning....all for a Harry Potter.....!!!! Ok!! I go and pre order a few books I want to read as well... but that is only when the store doesn't have it in stock...and so I order and they get it for me....I wait till they do so ....

I have seen my young nieces and nephews and some cousins running to buy the books... I read about people who reached the stores at 4.30 am... I heard about some stores offerring breakfast options with the book...I saw pictures of people sitting outside stores all night waiting for the first copy.....and thought What total crap!!! What craziness....!!!!

The funniest was in school... now I teach a class of children in the age group of 5+....they can't even read.. they are just learning to read three letter words and understand blends....and i almost fell off my lil chair ...when during the Show and Tell session in class... there was a child who had brought his little scrap book on Harry Potter.....he lisped through the entire thing and called Harry Potter -Halley Poller...and Hermione...-HerLineOnly.....and Dumbledore....Duffelbore.......

Another kid brought a stick and tried to tell us that it was Potter's wand....and then the worst of all.... one kid...wanted to tell us a story.... and so I said..."sure darling....whats the story called....?" and..yes... you guessed right...it seems.. the story was called Harry Potter and the deathly hallows......it seems his Dad ..had some how gotten the book online...and read it ...and then gone on to regale everyone at the dining table about the new Harry Potter story......

Now....I am all for parents spending quality time with their kids... reading to them ..telling them stories....playing with them.. taking them for trips...even if it is to the bookshop( I encourage that actually..we take Joy to the bookstore almost every weekend.. so what if he can't read..(hell..he can't even talk as yet) there are lots of lil books with bright picutures on them.. and we pick up something for him... which his ma can read to him...).....anywhere....do whatever ..as long as your kid and you have a good time... but these kids are not even 6 ..spare them please....at 6 years of age.. I don't want my kid asking me what deathly hallows means....or what prisoner means I am sure there are better stories for them to hear.... let them grow up and read Potter if they want to....

Anyways... the husband made me stay home the whole of yesterday...waiting for the package to arrive.... and called every hour to find out if it had...or whether I had gone off galavanting...lest his precious courier would have to face a closed door....then when he realised that no package had been delivered..he called up the online bookstore and threatened them with dire circumstances....

Well..we are still waiting for the book......I am glad... it hasn't come yet...coz.. I was trying to prepare my self for a weekend with out the husband... who had begged to be left alone for a day and a half...... so that he could spend it with Harry.......so yippee.... we got the weekend....!!!!

For all those who think I am insane to not like Potter..or understand the mania... please ignore this post...and spare me any

Tenth month birthday

2007-07-14T00:06:00.000-07:00

I forgot to do a post on Joy's tenth month birthday..... I have no excuses ...I suddenly remembered that I had forgotten... sorry my darling.....

Your ma may have forgotten but two people didn't .... your D'shona and your Nammi...

I came home on the 6th to find Joy playing with his D'shona who had come to spend the day with her Grandson...She came like she usually does ....aka.. Santa Claus..... she got some bath stuff for Joy....Three huge packets of wipes for me to use.....two new T shirts for Joy and some other stuff for our house..... since when did we also get presents for Joys month birthdays...we don't know... but we have realised that there is no point in arguing...so we don't ..and just accept everything and anything...

Joy's Nammi this time did something different as well... instead of her usual poem..she sent some prose....

"Our Little Love - on your 10th month b'day let me explain to you the "Power of Ten"
........... Thus begins your journey to be within 10, because yardstick of all competitions in life is measured from 1 to 10. We hope you shall not be forced to join the race for competitions. Grow to be a cool dude & we know you'll surely remain within 1 to 10 wherever necessary. Our prayers are there.....................................

Nammi - Dadabhai"

crisis # 2

2007-07-13T23:56:00.000-07:00

I had just written about the first crisis after I started work.... that was Joy related...... well..... am two weeks into work and am also in the midst of crisis # 2.....

I got the viral fever....

Yes ...its being doing the rounds all over...the part time maids seem to have it...my upstairs Aunty has it.....some kids in my class have it...some of the teachers have got it... some of the husband's colleagues have it ...everyone seems to have gotten it.... WELL!!!!!! I definitely have .....

So,.... I am sick....have a heavy feeling in the head...feverish..temperature the last time I checked was 102 degrees.....body ache is tremendous and my throat feels as if it is going to burst...can hardly swallow.

I couldn't go to work on Friday....was in such a bad shape..... went to see the doc ..who refused to give me any antibiotics.... and told me to have patience and bear the viral out.....so that was that...I have been surviving thanks to a combination of crocin and combiflam and a betadine gargle..... so every 6 hours when the medicine starts wearing out .... i start to feel sick and disgusting again ...and then after a fresh dose am a little better.....I hate it when I am sick..... and since I am not sick that often....I hate it even more...

I was a little worried about Joy getting the viral.... but was told by the doc...that he would get it anyways and if he doesn't then I should count my lucky stars.....There wasn't much I could do to prevent him anyways.... he was at home with me....I was home the whole day....and he was all over me.... despite my shutting myself up in my room there is only so much you can do when there is a lil someone banging his lil fists on my door and screaming his lungs out.....

Anyways I have to go back to work on Monday and I hope I feel better by then.... and I hope and pray that neither Joy nor the husband get the viral from me.....its horrible..... and if they do....I will have to live with them and nurse them back to good health....I don't know which is worse..being sick or looking after someone who is sick.....specially if it is my shona baby..my lil Joy....

We are moving

2007-07-13T23:24:00.000-07:00

The husband and I got married in Jan 2003...and now have been married for almost 4.5 years.....in these 4.5 years we have moved 4 cities.....

First stop for us was Bangalore....we were there for a year and a half and then Hyderabad for a year and then Mumbai for 5 months.....and the last one being Delhi for the past year and a half......
It's become a standard joke in the family about our frequent moves and whether or not we shall be in the same place long enough for people to visit us a second time.... we have grinned and borne the brunt of all these jokes....

Each move for us has been a better posting or opportunity for the husband ...both financially and professionally...... and me... I get a job in each city before we can even finalise a house...lol....so we haven't had much of a problem.... we have gotten used to the shifting to such an extent that we even know the packers and movers numbers for each city...and what kind of packaging material would suit us best.....etc...

The reason why I am writing about our moves all over the country is because we are all set to move again..... this time not all the way across the country...but yes all the way across the border to Gurgaon.....
The husband's office is moving there by December and the husband has always maintained that he would prefer to live close to work....he hates commuting.....Now if I hadn't gone back to work.. I would have told him that he would have to do the commute cos there was no ways I would move.... But now that I have started work and my work place also happens to be in Gurgaon.....it just makes sense for us to move....
There is no point in each of us commuting .....in which case we would both spend less time at home and with Joy....so in this case.... we should move just to make matters easier for all of us...

We are now doing the rounds of brokers and apartments and everything.... with the hope of finding something suitable by September.
If anyone knows of any apartments going for rent in Gurgaon please do let us know.....

My school is in a very central part of Gurgaon and has some very nice residential complexes around it....so our main aim would be to find an apartment in one of these complexes....This would mean my commute time would be almost zero.... I could leave for work at 8.10 am and be home by 2.45 pm.....what more could one ask for ....????

I have a cousin who lives in one of these complexes and her two lil boys are Joys best friends.....so I know he will have a great time.... My cousins maid and mine are friends as well...so that solves two problems.... two important people who need to adjust well to the move....My son and the maid....

The husband and I were just talking about what all we need to get done before we move...and the list reminded us of our earlier moves..... we called some packers and movers today.....surveyors should be visiting us soon.....so yes we have set the ball rolling.....

My mum has been very supportive....despite knowing that my moving away would mean that she wouldn't get to see her darling grandson everyday.....she has been telling everyone she meets who ask her why we were moving and how both she and my great grandmother would miss out on Joy and stuff....that she supports our move.... she keeps talking about my in-laws who get to see their grandson only on and off.... and that she was lucky to have had us near her for so long.... plus Gurgaon was only an hour away..and she would see us on weekends and holidays etc.....
She has been a darling....and has been all positive about the move...specially happy that I was back at work and that I would now be close to home as well..

Anyways... we are moving.....so anyone in Gurgaon ..please get in touch ....and let me know if there are some nice apartments going ok....

crisis....# 1

2007-07-09T07:49:00.000-07:00

Today I completed a week of being back at work... and didn't have a problem with the waking up..Joy grinned at me as I left... everything seemed cool.....

Joy and I woke up at 5 am.. and we cuddled and played for sometime... till he found the maid more interesting and went off for his tour of the house... and his Surya pranaam...( yes !! she makes him do it everyday... I was quite amused to see him in her lap looking at the little idols with a mischevious grin ..but with his pudgy arms and hands folded....lol)...and I was left to my cup of tea and the newspaper...

On sunday, the husband and I had noticed a small mosquito bite on Joy's hand... and had dismissed it as just another one... ( we had been told the previous week.. that junior was allergic to mosquito bites....after we had taken him to the doc...with some really bad bites which were looking really scary...however, Joy was as cheerful and did not seem to be affected by these bites....)..so we just put some of his ointment and went about with our normal activities...

This morning... Joy was at his energetic best...he was grinning, laughing loudly crawling all o ver the place ...nothing unusual and amiss.... so i kissed him and went to work..... before I had even reached work... I get an sms from the husband... telling me that Joy's hand is swollen.... but he was absolutely normal.... so i should get back home and take a call about the doc...

So naturally I was a little worried... I called home and was told by the maid that he was wrestling wih the cook and I should relax...and come home at normal time... but yes the hand was a swollen.

I got back around 4 pm....and saw Joy all excited and normal... yes his hand was still swollen.... So I took him into meet his old pediatrician.... hoping he would be at the hospital that day.... He was.. and was quite thrilled to see us.. especially Joy... he examined the hand and also agreed that my darling was allergic to bites.... and these would cause inflamation sometimes.... he would however not be in any kind of discomfort.....

Anyways medicine was prescribed and the next morning Joy was fine....

That night the husband and I were looking at our sleeping son and chatting.... I asked him a question that had been niggling in my mind since this had happened....

I had not till that time been worried about going back to work.... and asked him if this was a sign.... or something..... thank fully he looked at me .. and told me that I was just getting worried.... Joy was fine and that I had taken the right decision.....He was happy that I was back at work.... and quite happy to have me telling him about my day ... which was not just about diapers and potty and baby food....

Joy and I are loving our time together....in the mornings and the evenings..... I keep going into the nursery section in school... its right next door to my class... and look at the lil ones.... they seem to be having a ball...and think of Joy....

I love this school.... and love the methods they use.... the kids are so happy ...I can't wait for Joy to come to school with me as well....

But that is still a couple of years plus a lil more away ....... I think....

Back to work....

2007-07-03T09:16:00.000-07:00

Have been missing in action for a while......and I am guilty......whenever I have a few minutes to my self..... I can see my computer beckoning me....but the temptation to curl up and go to sleep is just too much to handle...... so sorry my dearest blog..... I will write..but not as often as I used to....

One of the main reasons for being irregular is coz now I am back to work.... yes I joined work yesterday....It's been two whole days and AM LOVIN IT!!!!!

I have been dying to go back to work ...for my own sanity and have written about it a few times as well... now that I am back at work..... I have no regrets...

The past few weeks have been quite crazy coz I had to prepare my household and my sweet son for those few hours that I wouldn't be home for...

Actually for the past few months I have been slipping out by myself.... for a coffee ...to meet a few friends....to a book shop.... out shopping ....something.... or the other.... I would be gone for a few hours and would be back in time for Joy's meals.... he would either sleep or be playing with his toys ...or supervising the household chores.. which he loves... LOL!!!!

I needed those few hours to myself....then....to be in a pleasant mood for the rest of the day..... Now that am back at work....it is tiring .. but am happy....

I have set a routine for Joy ...I firmly believe that kids thrive in a routine... and with Joy atleast it has worked out very well....

The husband and I have from day 1 been quite firm about what time he should sleep and he should eat his meals...his bath time ..his park time.....his play time..... every thing....and so much so .. that initially if we extended any particular scheduled activity... Joy would get cranky and be difficult to handle...

As he is growing up some of the timing we maintained have gotten extended ...but those are only natural and a part of his growth process ....but by and large he still sticks to routine....

Anyways... I had set a routine for Joy and we had been following it for the past few weeks to see how it would work out .....

The past two days with me at work haven't been a problem so far....am keeping my fingers crossed.XXXXXXX

However, I have to be thankful for the fabulous help I have...

I crib about them from time to time...hell even I am human.... but well.. if it wasn't for them.. I may not have gone back to work....

Joy wakes us up as usual at 5 am.... but now both the husband and I wake up and spend time with him.... after his diaper is changed .... he is now welcomed back into our bed to play and snuggle with us .. unlike earlier where he was sent off with the maid.....

The at around 7.15 am... I slip out while ..he is being fed his breakfast...... After his meal he spends time with his Baba.... and sees him off.at 8.30 am.. like he used to ...do with me...

The maid then makes him go to sleep.... for his morning nap..Joy sleeps at this time for about an hour and a half.... after which he is given his bath.....and then fed his mid morning snack.... which he loves and looks forward to...

My cook cum cleaner comes around this time...and keeps an eye on him while he does his work...and then is around for an hour.....

Joy then plays with the maid and does his dushtumi... all over the house....

At around 12 noon.... he is fed his lunch...after which the cook comes back to play with Joy ( also to give my maid a break)...till he falls asleep..for his afternoon nap.... this is also usually for an hour and a half.. and sometimes if we are lucky.....it stretches for two hours as well....

By this time its almost 2.30pm...... Even if he does wake up and play for a while.... or is fed a small snack of a biscuit .. at this time.... before he knows it I am home.... I get back around 3.30 pm.... and then after resting a while... I play with him and take him to the park around6 pm.....

The husband usually picks us up from the park or my mothers house.. where we go and pay my grandmother a visit every evening.....

I am enjoying my work... the change in my life....

as my sweet mother-in-law smsed me this morning.....

"All the best for the new job..... you are now starting a new and doing two of the most important things that women do best....teach...and the other is being a MOM.....You will be good at it like you are good at being a mother..."....Amen to that!!!!!

He is a growing boy

2007-06-27T01:44:00.000-07:00

How does that jingle go....

"He's a growing boy.... look how he's shooting up"..

"He's a growing boy....( i have forgotten the words....)..nananana...nanana"....

You guys know what I mean na???

Every few weeks , the maid and I sit and sort out Joy's closet...he outgrows his clothes every two weeks... and if it isn't that ... the weather changes and we need a change of clothing then....

Joy has been very lucky ..as I keep mentioning through out my blog.... all our aunts and other relatives...( both the husbands and mine) keep showering us with gifts for Joy...they come with bags of clothes for him.... the lil kiddo is only 9 months and owns 5 pairs of jeans...( a pair of light blue Levis, dark blue Next,blue- black acid wash, grey with red piping and black ) he has been wearing these from the age of 3 months and has them as of now right up till the age of 2.....( by the ways .. I checked.. The husband has two pairs of jeans and I have three .. which still makes his count more than ours)

Anyways... we keep going through all the clothes we have for him and changing his closet ..... yesterday ..we sat and aired all his trousers... yes he has four of those.. in beige, deep blue, moss green and black.... We had put these away for the past two months due to the intense heat... there was no way he was going to wear jeans in that weather.... but now that its quite pleasant in the evening ... I pulled them all out....

Joy all dressed up in his sandals, beige trousers and white Tshirt... all set to go out shopping with Ma

Joy looks quite cute now... we dress him up for the evening.... irrespective of where we are going and what we are doing in the evening... he is dressed up... and this usually means... full pants or jeans and a smart shirt or T shirt ... if its a lil nippy then he wears a basket ball jersey...

During the day ..if we are at home... he lives in his collection of 50 sleevless thin vests... some white ...some in different colours with cute slogans and his diaper....if someone comes home we slip on a pair of shorts over his diaper...

All this shifting his closet around also means that we have huge amounts of clothes that now don't fit him.... causing a HUGE storage problem for me.... after all I only have so many box bed and lofts...right....

so now we have another task to do.. we sit and sort out those clothes we think we might use incase I have baby number 2( my maid is very hopeful..and keeps keeping things I discard away...saying..."aar ekta to hobe..") these are the really nice ones....I hope all those people who gave Joy so much will do the needful for Baby no.2 as well...so those clothes we keep aside.. dryclean, or wash and sterilize and then get vacuum pressed and stored into the box beds.. and then some I give away to the help at my mum's place and also my maids to take home with them to give to family members having babies.....some the ones which are too good to give the help... I ask my friends with babies younger than Joy...if they would like to use them... and send them off...etc.... but its quite a task and every two months I have to do this....quite cumbersome.....

Here is another one of him.... He looks so cute...

Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain

2007-06-27T01:21:00.000-07:00

A few days ago... it rained...... it was beautiful... Joy loves the rain...and this time I took him out to the balcony and stretched his little arms out so that he could feel the raindrops falling on his tiny palms....

He was amazed when the first droplet splashed on tiny hand.....I carried him from balcony to balcony... I have four.. and we reached out for the rain... we stuck out our faces and felt the cold rainwater splash off our faces.... Joy had the expression he has when his Baba holds him under the shower...he was thrilled...then he tried to lick the rainwater off his hand.... I let him.... knowing that that water wouldn't be very clean..... it came off the terrace ledge afterall... but what the hell....!

Joy watching the rain from his balcony

We got wet.... then after we dried ourselves nicely.... Joy and I sat in his room with the balcony door wide open... and saw the rain go pitter -patter in front of us...the trees were all green..there was a nice breeze.....my maid brought me a cup of hot tea and Joy his sweet lime juice to sip on... and followed it with a plate of pakoras....and some marie biscuits for Joy....I sat with him in my lap...and sang a few "rain" songs....in English and Hindi.... the maid also got inspired and joined in with a few "monsoon" songs in Bengali... Joy just sat and listened....and smiled...and clicked his tongue...( he's learnt how to do that..some how...)

We sat like that for almost an hour... me sitting on the bean bag just looking out .....humming a few songs and Joy playing with his new toy....every now and then crawling out on to the balcony ..getting his hands wet and crawling back with a naughty look on his face....I loved it ....

Joy playing with his new Toys

Both of us missed the husband.... that kind of weather is his favourite.... I looked out and thought of him sitting inside an office working .. sometimes he doesn't even realise that it had rained... poor guy....

We missed you sweetie.... but there will be more like that one.........

Jamai Shoshti

2007-06-25T09:36:00.000-07:00

In Bengal, there is a tradition of something called Jamai Shoshti, where the son-in-law is fed special food and given gifts. On this day elders usually give the younger ones new clothes as well...

For the past four years, since our wedding, the husband and I have been away from my mother, hence ..she hasn't been able to do the needful personally. Usually , The husband and I have gone out to dinner at some fancy place and my mum's instructions would be to bill it to her. She would also send us new clothes and stuff...

This year we were in Delhi, so the day before, Mum arrived and gave Joy and me gifts, Joy got a blue checked shirt and I a lovely white and blue salwar kameez. When I asked about the husband, ma told me that they had already spoken... and he had requested her not to give him yet another set of clothes , but a book instead..... so she was very happy...( The husband and my mother are made from the same mould) The husband has gone and prebooked his copy of Harry Potters next... the number.....I can't remember....am not into it...

She then informed me that we should all be ready the next day for breakfast... it seems she had discovered this new breakfast buffet... and that would be her Jamai Shoshti treat....

So the next day, when the husband saw his son looking debonair in his new clothes... he went and found an outfit similar to his sons.....

Don't they look adorable....

Father and son team up in cool blues and khakis

Joy and me also dressed in new clothes

We went to C.P. so that the husband could go to work after breakfast and my brother would bring us all back....

For all those Delhiites.... who remember the old Nirulas in C.P.... well it closed down some time back.... and I was one of hose people who was quite sad ..when I heard ..It used to be our regular hangout after college.... we would go and share one HCF ( Hot chocolate fudge) between the four of us.... it used to be expensive back then.... around 50 bucks... and am talking ten years ago.....as students the only ways we could afford it was when and if we shared it .....

Anways, the good news is that it has reopened...it's in the outer circle just at the point where KG marg hits CP , above Amber Restaurant.....Its all new... open and airy... very nicely done up.... its got all their five separate eateries all under one roof.....called Nirulas Pot Pourri .

The other day we had tried the lunch salad buffet.....

I tell you ten years ago,, it used to cost Rs.105/- ...once about five years ago.... when I had been there the salad buffet had gone up to rs.120/-...I often usd to wonder why they couldn't increse the prices properly....( the were following the Petercat model...according the husband... where the price of the famouse chelo kebab had gone up from 80 bucks to 105 bucks over ten years....)

Anyways, it seems Nirulas Pot Pourri had started a breakfast buffet... and as a family we prefer breakfasts.. to any other meal....so it seemed ideal for the Jamai Shoshti treat.

It was fabulous.... the food amazing, Joy behaving himself.... the weather good.... and we all spent quality family time together after quite sometime.....which was wonderful....

Thanks Ma for the lovely Jamai Shoshti treat.....

Thakuma's out of her bed!!!!

2007-06-25T09:29:00.000-07:00

Three days ago, I got a call from my mother....Thakuma, my fathers mother, had been taken out of her bed ,( she had been bed ridden since last December) and was sitting in her wheel chair....in the garden.... I felt tears go down my face....

I had been hoping to hear this news for ages....and was so happy.....

I rushed over with Joy armed with my camera to capture the occassion.

Look at Thakuma with Joy on her lap.... both of them admiring my mother's new lush green lawn...

Thakuma and Joy

Walker Woes

2007-06-25T07:47:00.000-07:00

Every site I read on parenting has a different take on whether or not we should use a ''walker" to help the baby learn to walk...

Hmnnn... I read a lot ... and mentally decided to 'try' not using one... the husband and I had sort of taken this decision from stories we had heard as well as personal experiences....

The husband it seems was given a walker and when his grandmom and mother saw the contraption... they fainted... so they took photographs and then packed it up and kept it deep inside the loft.... lol...

I had grown up hearing stories about my cousin sister who used to go "whoosh" all over the place and then crash into things and fall over due to the thingy being very very unstable...

So...we said... "na..thaak"....

But after five days of running after Joy and him crawling into and under everything...we said .. maybe we should give it a try... at least it will have a radius.. and it will prevent him from lunging at some things at least.....and we won't have to hold on to him all the time... and he won't be able to go under things....

So , I called a cousin of mine who had offered to give us her son's old one.... now, this cousin.. is very particular about what her sons' use.. so I was sure she had bought a walker after properly researching the market... and sure enough.... its a great one... and even the husband .. after seeing it said .." Well! it looks very stable... unlike the one I had "

So , the walker arrived.... Joy took one look at it and gave us a toothless smile followed by a "Whoooooop!!!!! and Wheeeeeee!!!!!!" We too looked down at him with fondness ..thinking maybe we had done the right thing..... look how happy he is with it....maybe it will be good for him..he will learn to walk and explore....

That was one of the biggest mistakes we ever made... or one can call it our naivety.....I say.... we were idiots....!!!! Some one rightly told us that at each stage you think it can't get worse than this... but you are wrong... when the next stage happens... the previous one seems so so so peaceful....

Earlier , Joy would go under things and get into things... now he goes over them.... and around them....

Earlier , Joy would be crawling around ....so we would have to keep bending down to pick him up or help him stand up..... Now we have to look out and save our toes.. coz he goes over them.....and also we dont have to help him stand ..he is standing....

Earlier, he could not reach a few things.... but now.. he CAN....he can now open drawers, he can yank the table cloth off the table...with all the cutlery and crockery on it...

Earlier , my dressing table was safe.... now it isn't....nor is my nice-pretty drawing room.....and all the crystal...( thank god the drawing room has a door separating it from the rest of the house... so now it is out of bounds for Joy)

Earlier the fridge was off limits for him.... now he doesn't care...

Here is a pic of him openning the fridge door and examining what to chuck....

He did chuck the bread out... Thank god ! The eggs compartment was still a little too high for him..

Initially , he was a little unsure about manouvering the contraption.... but now he has mastered it.... he is still making a break for it .. whenever he sees the balcony door or the main door open....only difference being.... now he's gone in a flash... so if we thought the time when he would crawl and make a break for it ... bad.. it has just gotten worse...much worse....

I have been warned that it will become crazy when he starts walking.... I don't even want to think about it.....

Cornered in the walker

Fathers Day 2007 - a first for the husband and lil Joy

2007-06-20T06:14:00.000-07:00

Sunday was Joy and his Baba's first fathers day.

Joy woke his Baba up early in the morning with a lil present and a card for him... but I think the best present he could have given his father was what he did at that moment. He looked at his father and said "Ba-bba"....gave him a grin and proceeded to climb over him and try and yank at his hair.

My heart strings moved .... my eyes went a bit watery...I think the husbands went the same way too... he won't admit.. but I know...

Joy gave his Ba-bba a smart Van Heusen white linen shirt and two pairs of socks.. the latter was added when we found that he needed a few more socks.. LOL... and a very cute card.... I checked Ba-bba has put the card away safely in his drawer... along with a few more... like.. The card I sent him before we got married, the ones I gave him after we got married and some other letters or sweet notes I wrote him..as well as the one Joy gave him for his birthday..... so sweet... I tell you I like men who have a slight emotional streak in them....

That doesn't mean I need my man to be metrosexual or whatever it is they are calling them now... I like them to be men... I still have problems with men advising me on what make up to buy, or whether I should wear pink or yellow.... or those who fix up monthly facial appointments.... puh-lease..!!!!!

As I said... I like men to be men.... they don't need to come shopping with me... if they want to sit and watch formula 1.... let them... I will go and watch a mushy movie... instead... If they want to hang out with their guys friends once in a while... let them.. they are entitled to it.... after all I too go off to meet my girlie friends and talk rott....

I once met a guy who was this total stud... but when I heard he fixes up facial appointments two months in advance and has a set deal with a leading mens salon for his weekly manicures and pedicures.... and also his face wax session.... I am sorry....I forgot how hot he was..actually I think I forgot him!!!

Ok! before people jump on me for being so stuck up and not cool... well.... Ok... men should take care of them selves .. not for beautification... but for personal hygenie purposes... keep your nails clipped and under arm hair trimmed...shave ... take a regular bath... use a good deo... do whatever.... but weekly appointments.. and face wax... good lord..!!!!! take a hike...

Ok!!! so going back to what I was saying about men being men .. but with a slight emotional streak.... The husband is one such guy....

He is ever willing to help out with Joy, clean up after his son, change diapers at all hours, try and walk his son to sleep....etc. I have already written a number of posts about how good a father he is ... you can read them all over my blog. He is the most wonderful son-in-law...so much so... my own mother prefers to talk to him rather than me....He is also a very good son.. very close to his family....respects his elders and from what I have seen they value what he says and since he is the eldest amongst his cousins he is also the best Boro Dada one could ever ask for. I shall not again talk about how wonderful a husband he has been and is till date .. 'coz I have already done that earlier... and ahem!! there is no need to give him too much "bhaav"....

Anyways coming back to what we did on Fathers day....

It was the most idyllic day ever.... the kind I love... we spent the entire day together ..just the three of us... We got up early as we were woken up with Joy and his "Ba-bba"..... then the husband and I went for our usual morning walk... the weather was lovely..so it was very nice. We then had a nice and lazy breakfast, gave Joy his bath and set off for Lodi Gardens..Joy loves this park.... since the weather was great the entire place was green and shady... the birds were chirping and there were quite a few dad's spending time with their lil kids... which I found very cute.....after a nice walk around the park ...we headed for Khan Market... I love that place.. its so nice and each lil corner has some hidden treasures ... like Mrs. Kaurs Cookies shop ( am now a fan for life), The Sugar and Spice Bakery which has the most amazing cheese and cold cuts along with their delicious baked goodies, Khan Chachhas for the best kathis, Chonas for good old chinjaabi... and The Big Chill cafe.... not to mention all the Anokhis and Fab Indias and Good Earth and The Home Store..and well I could go on and on.....

Anyways the idea was to try out this place called the Rampur Kitchen.... which it seems according to the HT city eating out guide... had amazing Haleem and Mutton raan and stuff... so us being us... we headed there.... lol... we went around and around... and never found it.. then on asking... we were informed that it had shut and in its place was this ultra cool Cafe Zaffiro... which looked very good.... but when I looked in... I saw lots of foreigners hanging around and also lots of smoke... so since we had Joy with us.. it was a no-no... the husband was quite relieved as well.. coz while I was peeping inside.. he was reading their menu which was up on a black board outside.... it started off with Organic Pineapple salad and mushrooms tossed in herbs and fresh veggies.... I don't think my meat eater husband read any further.... lol.

Anyways, we ended up at The Big Chill Cafe... and since we had reached early we got place quite easily and didn't have to wait at all.. And .....the food was to die for... we started off by sharing a cold cut platter... which was very very nice... and then shared a frilled fish in a Portuguese Piri Piri sauce which was devine.... Joy ate his lunch which I was carrying for him... sitting in his stroller.. and then once he was done nibbled on a few cauliflower florets while we ate....

We had no place for dessert... and headed straight home for a nice nap under the Razai.... Joy thank fully cooperated and slept as well... in the evening we went and visited my grandmothers.... yes both of them.... and then returned home to watch Tv ...and laze in bed till dinner time.... It was the most perfect day ever.....

Domestic help and my problems

2007-06-15T05:45:00.000-07:00

I have just gotten back from discussing Domestic help ( maids) with a friend and came home to find that she had already posted on the same topic.... before our discussion... which now explains why she had that grin while I ranted and raved!!!!! hmnnnn!!!

After reading it I just had to write... I tell you... sometimes.. these people just drive me mad...

I have a full time live in maid.. who is usually pretty good.... she is neat and clean and is very affectionate towards my son and has been with me from when I was four months pregnant and took very good care of me.. Due to all this I also know she is a good person....I usually don't make a fuss over everything she does...I check her if she doesn't do something right.... and I always do so in private... I do not do so in front of others and specially not the other help....

This does not however mean... that I will take all the rubbish and keep quiet....

When I was discussing this with my friend who has always had problems with the help....and I am usually the one who has to listen to her rants and raves and I always feel very sorry for her...managing a big house... two lil kids and a lot of crazy help....however.....this time I was fed up...

My maid... after she joined us realised that all the help employed with my family....even extended family have been there for ages... once they join.... they rarely leave.... they are a very well looked after lot.... they earn well.. they are tipped very frequently....thanks to all of us having innumerably guests all the time.. we look after their medical bills and also loan them or gift them money in their times of need. We have people over frequently for dinner and I usually ensure that she eats by around 9 pm.. cos sometimes our parties carry on till very late and there is no set time for dinner.. so why make them wait while we enjoy ourselves ?

We even don't make differentiations regarding the food they eat.....they eat what we eat... now in a number of places... they eat leftovers... and their rice and atta is made separatly.... in our family no such thing is allowed... we eat basmati... they do too.. we eat pillsbury atta they do too....some people say we spoil them.... well maybe ... but then again...its worked ok for us....

The maid at my mums house.. now buys... tea and rice from here and takes it along to her village when she goes on her annual leave... according to her .. now she can't get used to eating the thick rice they eat in the village... so yes maybe we spoil them!!!!

Anyways.... I sometimes feel they also take us for granted.....

I usually ask the maid to take her food after I have finished my meal...and put away whatever is left after she finishes... yesterday..I forgot...to ask her...

This morning after breakfast ..when I asked her to clear the dishes and have her meal while I played with Joy....before his bath.....she comes up to me and with this very "naeka"look....tells me ... that she never ate dinner last night.... so I asked her why....and she said... that ..Just....

so I was like Ok... whatever... and kept quiet.... and got busy.... then when Joy was being fed his mid morning snack... she repeated her not having dinner story....so this time I again asked her why..and she said...coz I hadnt asked to eat the night before....

I blew my fuse... I was hopping mad....I told her... that if she expects me to ask her after every meal she is sadly mistaken.....she should have the brains to eat ...I have never stopped her or asked her to eat.....what the hell!!!!!

What got me even more mad was that she expected me to feel guilty... well I dont ....

She has been given a piece of my mind... and has been shown the door incase she is finding it difficult to take it.... naturally she started stuttering and stammering after that.....

ok ..so that was her!!!

The bit is ..now that I have come back and set up home close to my mums place.. a lot of the support staff are old timers.. they cook at mums and granny's and also come to my place and cook... it suits me fine... they are known people.. when I start work.. familiar people .. will be around Joy...for example the cook... he has seen me since the age of 15.... the grin Joy gives him everyday is priceless....he comes to cook at the crack of dawn and when I was looking for a cleaning person.. he volunteered saying that... I shouldnt let too many unknown people into the house... and that he would come and do the cleaning... so I was quite relieved...he is fabulous with Joy...He once told me .. he misses his own kids so much..he has two of them.. whom he sees only once every year for a month....so I feel sorry for him and let him drop in and play with Joy often...Joy knows him as Bharat Mama...

Anyways, the problem .with old timers... he doesn't listen to me most of the time.. If I have asked him to make a vegetable in a particular way he will cook it in the way he wants to....he sometimes doesn't come to cook and when I ask him the next day.. he turns around and tells me... "why? I cooked lots of food at nani's yesterday... there was a party... werent you all invited...? I thought you all were so I didnt think it was necessary to come here and cook...."..accha tell me....can't my grandmother entertain without us....? I found out later...that he does it with the others as well.. In case I have a party one day that day he conveniently bunks mums and nanis... I tell you he takes the cake... Then since he is the old timer... he bosses over all the other help... and sometimes.. gets them into trouble...by telling them what to do... when I have told them to do the opposite....

But he is a good soul so usually he gets a stern talking to... and everything is fine after that....

This friend also mentioned about how she was shocked when she saw some families who had come to a restaurant with their maids and didnt give them a morsel of food to eat..... I so agree with her.... I too have seen this happen very often and have always wondered .. why people do this...

The husband and I are so particular... if we go over to a friends place where we feel it will be helpful to have my maid along we take her... I always ensure that she eats her dinner before we go over.....If we feel we can manage with out her.. which is often.. we leave her home after all she also deserves some time off..

Till a month ago we had a driver... so since I was being chauferred everywhere I didnt need to take the maid if I went for a cup of coffee.. I could hold on to Joy...

Now we have let the driver off and I am driving my car... we didn't have a car seat for Joy all these days...so suddenly I found that I was stuck taking the maid everywhere I went with Joy.

One day I had to go to a Barista for a cup of coffee... the poor thing she heard we were going to this place... and took out her best saree to wear...I felt so guilty....I wasn't meeting anyone.. it was just supoosed to be Joy and me.. so I made her sit at our table and ordered her a cup of tea as well... poor thing she felt so out of place....but also was quite thrilled.. so I made it sound as if I had brought her here to show where her" babu" likes to come to have his Mango smoothie.. she had been hearing about this place...so I thought she should see it as well...

Anyways... the very next day.. I went out and picked up a car seat for Joy... and so now we can go out just mommy and baby without inconveniencing anyone and ourselves....

Comparisons

2007-06-14T07:08:00.000-07:00

I was going through another fellow blogger's post on comparisons between babies....

Its a very natural thing....If I have an apple for tiffin.. and my friend has one too.. I will try and see if hers is redder ....If a friend of mine goes and buys a saree from the same shop where I bought my similar one.. I will ask her how much she got hers for... if it was more than I would feel satisfied... or quite thrilled.. and if it was for less I would feel cheated and upset....

So in otherwords..we always compare... either consciously or sub consciously...its human nature...

I have my mum and aunt breathing down my back nagging me about potty training Joy.. according to mum... I was potty trained by 6 months...or something like that.. and my brother was from day one... ( I don't believe a word of this... but whatever!!!) Whenever anyone sees Joy in his diaper.. they ask me..." he isn't always in a diaper ? is he?"

I honestly don't know why everyone is so concerned... Joy is our son.. we naturally have his best interests in mind.. and also are trying to do the best for him....

No he isnt potty trained..and Yes he is always in a diaper.. except for his bath time... so what....??

I have decided not to potty train him...

He will learn by himself...till then Diaper zindabaad...tellme honestly .. how many teenagers or even 10 year olds do you know who are not potty trained...or who crap in their pants.. ( sometimes mishaps happen.. hell they can happen to the best of us...)

Well if no one teaches them. they learn by them selves... off late a number of my friends have told me that their kids learnt themselves at around 2 years... thats fine by me... by the age of 2 .. a child can speak...by then hopefully and also therefore will be able to communicate their needs....I will just have to teach my child that the horriblly uncomfortable and squishy feeling that happens after potty is called Potty.. so they should either tell me before it happens.. or they will have to deal with the mess.. bas..I have a feeling one or two mishaps and they will figure it out by themselves...

The other thing... that keeps bugging me is this question...of why I keep my son in diapers all day.... well... Joy has got a rash just once touch wood..and that too only for a day.. he is 9 months old now... we change him frequently.. and now in summer I ensure that that frequency has increased...he is at peace and we are at peace.. I thought the keyword of the times... was Peace.. Man.... well so... yes!!! Peace Man!!!!

I have the whole world asking me if Joy has started teething....

well he supposedly started at three months... his gums turned white... I was asked to give him Calcera Phos...did that...I was made to buy hajaar teethers.. etc.... did that as well...rubbed clove oil did everything.... and yes he had started biting me like hell.... But.... no teeth..and still no teeth and he is 9 months old...

Now the husband and I aren't bothered...but..we have this couple who are friends.. and their sweet lil daughter is just 6 days younger than Joy... yes 6 days!!! and she has 2 teeth... and the third on the way... she started crawling before him... she ,I am sure will start walking before him as well...she even started sleeping through the night ages ago..... Joy is still problematic...

I sometimes compare Joy and this lil child.... and keep looking down at Joy with a worried look when he hasn't reached the milestones .. she has.... so I fret...sulk a bit.. get a little worried.. and then I come home and look at myself and feel like giving myself a shake... what is wrong with me!!!?????

Let Joy be.... he is a good healthy child... his doc assures me ..that he is doing fine( touch wood)....he hasn't fallen sick or had any such problems other kids might have at his age....( touch wood.. and I hope no lil kids are sick ever)......So why was I acting like a complete buffoon....?????????

Joy was fine....I had better chill....

I have taken a vow not to compare at all... I know... this vow will be broken everyday... but I shall try....

So all those of you who do the same... well... don't worry about it... its natural... and if we didn't have these lil faults... we would be GOD.... na??

We bought a new car!!!!

2007-06-13T03:51:00.000-07:00

We had been planning on buying a new car for sometime now.... ever since Joy has been born.. all the paraphanelia... plus a maid and everything..... our sweet small car our Alto was just a lil too small...

What with the driver, Joy, the maid, me and all the stuff... the husband.. would either have to let driver off and drive himself.. or we would have to leave the maid home... which would mean... no peace for either of us... lol....

So.. now we have two cars... one a small car... which I use.. to run my errands and go meet up with my friends

and one a slightly bigger car... a sedan...its called the SX4....its the new Maruti Suzuki Sedan.. launched just over a month ago....

The last few months when we were contemplating about buying the car... and which one to buy.... have been quite entertaining.....

The husband and I are quite clueless when it comes to cars... ( ahem the husband is a mechanical engineer ... but doesn't know the front of a machine from the back of it ..) We were of the opinion that we needed a bigger car.... and by that we meant.... it should have a good boot...so that we could stow a number of things without having a problem... and that we could sit a little more confortably.... in the back seat....and that was that...

We had a budget.. and were hoping to stick within it....

..and then...? what happened...???

Well we suddenly found ourselves in the midst of major discussions and debates about which car should be bought by us....despite all the talk.... we in our minds had decided which one to buy....it was within our budget... it had good boot space..had good resale value...and did good mileage....

bas.. we were decided...

We were quite amused by the excitement and enthusiasm shown by our friends and family...three people most of all... one person was my brother... and the other was a close friend and her husband...and another friend... and this one... says she isn't excited by worldy possessions and such things and believes in a frugal lifestyle.. etc ..etc...

Anyways we went to test drive our chosen car... the Maruti Esteem...we drove it and found it convenient to manouver etc.. then the sales agent and my brother who had accompanied us.... casually asked us to also look at the new SX4 which had just been launched......

so we said... theek hain.. whats the harm....../?? ..... and we were bowled over....... not only by the looks but also by the feel.... one could not make out that the car was on..it was so smooth and silent.....

To be fair to our selves ..we decided to try out another car in the same segment.... the GM Aveo... we had ridden in it before...the husbands father and my uncle both have the Aveo... it was nice...So... we drove that one as well... but couldn't forget the SX4... we then realised we would have to increase our budget a bit... the husband tried to work it out and the biggest plus about the SX4 we found was that since it was a Maruti car it wouldn't be a problem to get spare parts replaced and service stations were all over....As a friend told us.. we could now safely drive upto Leh...lol!!!

Anyways.. the bottom line is that we have a new car.. we have the SX4... the husband is now a total convert.. he wont even drive the Alto unless its absolutely necessary.... and am glad.. coz.. I refuse to drive the SX4..I have decided I shall only be driven in that car.....lol... much to the husbands amusement...

Yippeee!!!! I am now mobile again....and Joy and I are all set to paint the town red....

Joy's first Balloon

2007-06-12T21:40:00.000-07:00

All these days Joy hasn't been fascinated by balloons being sold at traffic signals and other lil toys that they keep trying to shove inside the car.....all specially made to lure kids....

After Joy's birth whenever we have passed such a vendor... the husband and I would get excited and look towards Joy pointing them out to him.... hoping he would respond.... but he didn't.... he liked our faces more... he would keep looking at us and grin....

Day before yesterday.. while I was driving to the market with Joy and the maid in tow... we stopped at a signal... and there was this balloon wala... he had yellow and blue and red balloons...he came up to the car and waved them at us.... for the first time I saw Joy look excited at the balloons.. and he tried to reach out for them...

I was so thrilled that I promptly went ahead and parked the car and took Joy out to select his Balloon... he chose a bright red one ..a heart shaped one... I actually thought he would like the squiggly one... but he chose the heart shaped one... by grabbing it with both his arms...

We were so thrilled with our purchase that we drove around to my mum's place to show off our balloon.... My mum gave one look and said..." Ok!!! all the best.... the I want phase has started...."....laughed loudly at me and then went off to play with her grandson and his balloon....

Joy's red balloon

The balloon burst today while Joy was playing with it ... I think his lil nails did the damage.... when I heard the loud pop... I ran to see if Joy wasn't startled..and crying.... but no... Not my Joy... he was sitting with shreds of the balloon in his hands and a devilish grin on his face... looking around for more things to go and burst!!!

Early Morning activites

2007-06-12T21:13:00.000-07:00

Every morning Joy wakes us up by 5.30 am... I don't know how he does it .. but....every morning without fail... we don't even have to check the clock nowadays...

The husband and I try and go for a walk together everymorning.... we figured that since we are up so early anyways.. we might as well.. make the best of the decent weather at that time of the day and also.. attempt at some kind of a fitness routine.... I must confess however, The husband is more regular than I am..Sometimes after waking up about ten times at night to put Joy back to sleep... when he finally wakes up properly at 5.30 am I just hand him over to the maid and turn over to catch some undisturbed sleep for about an hour.... The husband who... ahem!! ...has slept the entire night ... is fresh at that time and hence goes for his walk...

( I am told by all the old aunties and uncles who see him at that park...." How come you don't come everyday.. your husband is so regular... .dear... you should also be regular.. only then will you lose some weight ...no??".....OK!!! Whatever!!!! Thanks for your concern... and Whatever!!!! %$^&* )

Anyways , when we do go for our walk... we have to slip away while Joy is being entertained by the maid or being given something to nibble....and when we return... Joy has finished his breakfast and is in his walker creating havoc.. and bossing over the cook who comes in at that time to do his magic and the car cleaner who has to clean two cars before the husband leaves for work....

Ths husband is sweet .. he shaves before we go for our walk.. so that he can spend more time with Joy in the morning before breakfast....so from around 7.15 am till 7.50 am... is our time with our son.... this time is also shared with the newspaper.. ie. if it survives Joy and the Sudoku....

Joy usually is so thrilled to see us in the morning... and spends most of that time climbing all over us .. and trying to sip at our nimbu pani....the lil fellow is quite a performer... he tries to show his Dad.... all his tricks... like rolling all over the floor,trying to pull the AC cables.., crawling under the coffee table..., sliding off the sofa and trying to turn one of the peck tables over, making a break for it as soon as he sees the balcony door open.. etc....

When we sit down for our breakfast at around 8 am.... he sits with us in his high-chair and plays around with a few of his toys or a few cornflakes.. and sings for us...( yells is more like it).....he is usually put into his bath by around 8.15am after seeing his father off to work....

By 8.35 am or so... he is all nice and fresh.. smells lovely and ready for a bit of mommy time.. the both of us... play for a while ....cuddle and then .... gradually he starts singing his sleep song.... by 9 am... he is fast asleep....and usually sleeps for approximately 1 hour.. and sometimes if we are lucky about 2 hours ....

The maid and I get this break to finish some of the household chores and also get ourselves ready for the day.....

If someone asks me which part of the day do I enjoy most with Joy ..I would say.... my early morning mommy time after his bath is most precious...

Joy showing off his new activity mat sent by Bulku mashi....

Early morning Mommy time

The Shoe Story

2007-06-11T02:58:00.000-07:00

Everyone has a fetish.... The husband does.... He has more books ..than clothes.. and that fact was one of the first things he told me about himself...

My Mum does...she collects old perfume bottles... hell not only old ones.. but also new ones... and doesn't use any one of them.... they dry up and then get transported to her collection cupboard...

My brother does.. he collects matchboxes from everywhere.... as well... as miniatures of various things and has them all arranged on the ledge above his desk at work...

My mother-in-law does ..she collects all kinds of cleaning liquid and gadgets.... she has various bottles from all over the world with various coloured gooey liquid in them..which she deligently uses to clean every inch of her house...

I do too... I collect cook books and childrens story books...I also collect clothes and shoes and bags... and..... well!!!! Whatever....( rolling my eyes)..This post isn't about my fetish for a number of things ..but about Joy and his...well...collection of shoes...

I don't call it a fetish.. coz..poor guy doesn't even know what that means...he eats what I make him eat.. he plays with all the toys I give him ...he sleeps when I make him sleep ....He wears what I make him wear...he does what I want him to..... ok!!!! scrap the last one... He does exactly what he wants to do....

Anyways this post is about his collection of shoes....

Joy is 9 months old.. and he owns... 20 pairs of shoes... yes... 20

In the past 9 months he has worn 7 pairs....each one has a story....

Firstly.... There was this pair I bought him.... at 2 months.... He never wore it... no.. maybe once or twice... and they kept slipping off.. they were yellow.. his favourite colour and with a lil giraffe embroidered on them...they were cute... but well they were quite useless.. coz.. at 2 months .. very few babies need shoes... that is also one of the reasons why I don't have a picture of them.. coz.. I think I gave them away.

Then came pair number two...a very smart pair of sneakers from Mother Care..in blue and red.. with laces .. and an anti skid sole.. The husband's aunt had brought a whole load of stuff for Joy and these were the cutest..and the pair that fit him when he was 4 months... The husband and I loved this pair.. ....when we saw the price tag however....we almost died... It cost 28 pounds.... yes ....28 pounds.... There was this funny incident .. when .. the husband's sister accompanied us for Joy's doctors visit... while we were waiting our turn... Joy decided to do potty and hence had to be cleaned.... the sweet father and enthu cutlet aunt were ready to do the needful... however when they opened his diaper.. they found a total mess and were trying to do a neat job . ....what was I doing.... ???? The first thing I did was to take off Joy's sneakers and then hold them away from the mess ..My sister-in-law was quite amused .. and came home and told everyone.. that "here were we ..in the middle of loads of potty.. and Tina is yelling at the top of her voice... don't let the shoes get dirty..."..well what to do....? I have been told by the husband that I should frame the shoes with some of the stuff of Joys that I plan to frame and add to his room's wall... you know memorablia.... but may be I will hold on to it till baby number 2 arrives.. and then decide...

The third pair was one given by the sister- in -law , Joy's aunt herself... She came to Delhi to see her lil nephew for the first time.. also loaded like Santa Claus...Both she and her sweet hubby had apparently had a blast shopping for stuff for Joy...and this pair of red canvas shoes were one of the things... They are adorable... and go very well with Joys jeans .. P.s Joy also found this particular pair to be extra tasty...

The fourth pair is a pair of leather sandals or floaters.... very very smart... and by smart ... I mean SMART... not cute... but SMART.... This is one pair ...I would pick up even for the husband... These were given to Joy by a cousin of mine... she has two lil boys of her own....and dresses them very well...Joy used to wear it when he was 6 months old... and could wear it even till about a month ago... try and visualise.. Joy in a linen shirt...a pair of khakis and these shoes... very very happening and cool... na...

The fifth pair is another MotherCare pair of shoes ... very cute ... They are called Pioneers.. they are meant for babies.. who are attempting to walk... they are very soft with anti skid soles..I think Joy liked these the best himself... coz.. he would sometimes wail when we tried to get his feet into any shoe... but with this one.. he never did... these were his regular park visit shoes..

The sixth pair is a pair of red summer sandals... that I picked up from the local market.... They are casual and are perfect for summers in Delhi.. where the weather is miserable.... nice and airy they keep his feet cool.And are my favourite colour.. RED.

The seventh pair is another pair of canvas shoes in blue and orange... they are still a lil big for Joy but I still make him wear them....I am hoping they will help him walk.. he is attempting to do so....This pair was given by my cousin with the two lil boys as well...

Joy already has another 12 pairs of shoes in his closet... which will fit him till he will be 2 years old.... I am not writing about them... cos.. then I shall be here for ever....

Going back to what I was saying.. Joy and his shoe collection are fabulous....he now actually shows which pair he would like to wear with what clothes.... how does he do that at 9 months ?..Well he does... he either points out or throws the worst temper ever..if I decide otherwise... the shoe which reaches his mouth first ..is the one he wants...

Will write about the other pairs as and when he wears them....

Captured

2007-06-10T21:46:00.000-07:00

What does one do if you kid doesn't sit still.... ????

Well.. I go mad.. and run after him.... or make the maid run after him... making sure he doesn't pick up something and put it in his mouth... or so that he doesn't hit against sharp surfaces.. or basically we try and make sure he doesn't get into trouble and get hurt...

Joy is now all over the place... if he is crawling... he slips out from under our noses....if he is in his cot.. he tries to climb out of it..or pull whatever he can get his lil hands on...if he is in his high chair.. he is usually yelling at the top of his voice for attention or throwing things at us.. if he is on the floor ..he wants to be lifted on to the bed or sofa.. if he is on the bed or the sofa... he wants to be put down on the floor...and if he is in his walker.. there is just no stopping him....

In other words.. the maid and I are going MAD.....

The other day, I had left Joy with his Dad for a while .....the husband was working on his laptop and Joy was playing on the bed with his toys.....after a while I could hear some squeaky sounds coming from the room... I said ..to myself... "Don't go in there .. let father and son bond..." The sqeaks soon became little screams and then.... groans...

I then went in there to see what was happening and almost collapsed in laughter.... The sight that greeted me ..was ...

The father had found a unique way of controling Joy... and keeping him under his thumb ..or should I say leg.... LOL!!!!

Poor Joy was trying desperately to get out from under his Dad's thigh-leg....and the father was continuing with his work without even noticing his son...

I saw that things were under control.... if Joy's scream became louder and I was sure the father would change his tactics...

After about 10mins... I came back to find the father had given up...and had resorted to a wrestling game with his son....LOL....

Curtains

2007-06-07T21:08:00.000-07:00

This post on Joy's room curtains has been inspired by Tharini's post on clothing memories which you can read here

The husband's aunt had come down from the UK loaded with gifts for Joy...and she had brought a whole set of stuff only for his room....

We put everything up.... the theme which she had chosen was Animals.. and hence.. the curtains too had prints of giraffes and lil elephants and horses.... very very cute...

She had brought two sets of curtains... and when I put them up I found that there was too much sunlight coming in....and this being the height of summer... and all... poor Joy would roast... so I teamed them up with a set of red handloom ones and added bright orange loops for the animal print ones...

Now Joy's room looks nice and bright as well as shady...and a bit cooler than it was before... His room also has animal photo frames and a low mattress to match... Everything in that room now is in the colours of yellow, orange and red.....

Whenever Joy enters that room... his eyes light up looking at all the colours.....

And the grin he gives me.... Awwwwww!!!!

Daily morning fix

2007-06-07T20:36:00.000-07:00

Everyone has their own type of early morning fix.... their get me going thingy....

Some people have to have a cup of tea.... or coffee.... some people have to turn on the music... ...some people have to light up....some people do yoga...some do a glass of water..whatever.....

The husband... has to have a glass of water and then yell for the newspaper and head for the loo...

The maid has to do "namaskar" to the sun and to her tulsi plant.....

I have to groan..and turn over.....and groan again....and yell for my bed tea....

Joy has his morning routine as well....

Somedays he... starts crying in his sleep....mind waking up ..but eyes..still wanting to stay shut...

Somedays he ...wakes up smiling....and turns over to stick his finger in our noses or pull hair..

whichever is within hands reach...

Somedays he...wakes up...looks round....and makes a"break for it".....heading straight for the

bedpost....or tries to climb over us...

Actually.... in all of the above... the routine ends only in one way....He always makes a break for it .

However after waking up he leaves our room.. to take his daily tour of the house... ie.. after the maid has made him also do his Surya and Tulsi namaskar..... he sits down to read...(ahem!! destroy ...) the newspaper....

This makes his father grin everytime... but only untill he realises ... that the paper in question is today's paper and he still hasn't read it .....LOL....

Joy reading/destroying The Mint...

This happens everyday.... I must say... full marks to Joy for his perseverence and full marks to his father as well.. for daily stupidity....

I think he has grown taller

2007-06-07T10:33:00.000-07:00

Joy has been standing up for ages... he just holds on to something and stands up...

This has raised a lot of people's eyebrows and I have got loads of advice on how it isn't right for a lil baby to stand all the time... his legs will not be strong enough to support him... he will be bow legged.. he will get square feet.. ( whatever that means)....lots of "Oh! My Gods...."...."Aie....Ki..s"....."Aie...Ma..s".... but... well he stood then and still does it now.. My trying to make him sit... just doesn't work....

He not only stands ... but also does .. a ... "Dancy dancy"..which is him standing up and jumping up and down... or swaying by himself...

What to do?.. he is like that only... lol...

Joy standing on the floor mattress holding on to his cot rail

Joy has been standing up in his cot and demanding to be picked up .. or tries to grab at his cot mobile...he has been trying to look over the top of the side of the cot....

Yesterday.. I suddenly saw him stand up and I found that not only was he standing easily.... but also that the top of the bed rail was half way down his chest.....

Joy standing up in his cot

Now I am petrified..... he is a smart kid.. it wont take him long before he will figure out a way to climb on to the bit which folds down and jump over.....

Good Lord!!!!!!!! What am I to do.....????

En-Joy-ing the breeze in his High chair

2007-06-07T10:05:00.000-07:00

Joy's didon and muma....( the husband's paternal aunt and maternal aunt) gifted him his high chair for his Annaprasan....

He sits on his high chair to eat......to supervise the help when they are doing the house work...to join his parents at the dining table and watch while they eat...to basically stay out of trouble...

We have a nice balcony in front of the house... where we have a lot of potted plants...to add some greenery to our lil flat... as well.. as to give us our supply of fresh oxygen ....

Joy likes to sit in his high chair and look out of the balcony at the 'pakhis'..birds, the 'kaak'..crow,the 'paata'...leaves, 'Dida' ..grandmother across the road... he sits there and enjoys the cool breeze when there is one... he sits and sings along with his Ma ..or listens to his Ganga mashis bhajansas she sings to him in the evening while she waters the plants....he sits and yells like and at the push cart vendors who come to sell their veggies and fruits and all other stuff...

Check out Joy sitting in his High chair :

Enjoying the breeze

Playing with a toy

Grinning at the Dida across the road

Making a break for it ..

2007-06-07T09:20:00.000-07:00

Joy has been crawling around for a few weeks now... he goes everywhere and anywhere..... We have almost no control over him....

If we pick him up... he squirms so much that it is difficult to hold on to him... If we put him on the bed...our bed... he tries to slide off.. If we put him into his cot.... he stands up and shakes the entire thing... till I am sure it will collapse...

If we put him down... he shoots off before we can say....Gudda Budda...( his D'shona's latest name for him)....

This act of his crawling off.... as if he has a train to catch has become a joke in the family... One day his Mamu saw this and said... " hey! Sis.... your son is making a break for it ..."... since then.. whenever Joy is put down on the ground and he crawls off before we can bend down to stop him.... we warn each-other to guard him in case he makes a "break for it .." lol... which he does everytime...

Here are some photographs of him "Making a break for it ..." .. when he found the balcony door open.. and us not really looking.... or ahem!!!.. he thought so....

Look at him go....sneaking towards the open door

Nudging the door open and slipping through

Falling flat on his face in his attempt to "make a break for it ..."

Yippeee!!!... made a break.... and out I go...

P.S.. Poor chap.. didn't know that he was allowed to make a break for it.... LOL... his Ma was just too busy clicking away to bother...

Happy Ninth Month birthday....Joy!!

2007-06-06T05:36:00.000-07:00

Every month since Joy has been born ...I try and do something special on his "month " birthday..... This time too.. I had been counting the days for a while.... but yesterday.. I forgot all about it....

Today is Joy's ninth month birthday.....

Joy kept waking up every three hours last night.. so I was a bit cranky.... plus I had been nursing a swollen lil toe.. thanks to ramming it against the bed...hence... in otherwords... I wasn't the best person to be around early in the morning...

We don't need to look at the clock everymorning.... Joy lets out this wail at around 5.30 am every morning..... and then we pat him back to sleep... he quietens down for ten mins and at 5.40 am... I can usually feel someone tickling my back ..or trying to put his chubby lil finger up my nose... or if I am spared.. I can hear the husband..going" oh! ho! Buro.... chool taane na..." which means Joy has turned the otherway and is tugging at his fathers already sparse hair....

This morning....I half opened my eye to see something chubby squirming past my shoulder.... and when I turned my head in that direction... I saw Joy holding on to the headboard and about to take off... naturally I yelped... and the husband who was in the loo... almost ran out... lol.. quite funny....

Anyways... I forgot to hug my son... who was now 9 months old.... however not everyone forgot like we did....

His fans.. aka... his D'shona..( my mum ) and his Dadu and Nammi( the husbands parents) were the first people to send in their greetings.....

Am still waiting for my Mother-in-law's birthday poem... she sends one every month.... for Joy... very sweet....

"I call your Pa my Sunshine and your Pini my Rainbow

What do I call you my little darling beau?

You rule all our thoughts & aspirations

Praying ardently that each stage of your growing be reason for celebration

A beautiful body mind & soul you need to have in life’s journey

May you achieve this with all help from your Daddy & Mommy!

P.S. You are the beacon in the autumn of our lives …!

Love - Dadabhai
Nammi "
( it came in before I posted this...so here it is)

I was wondering what to do with Joy today.... then thought that since he was 9 months old now.. he was a big boy... and hence should go out with his Ma to run some errands and do some shopping ... despite it being 44 degrees outside...( My mom yelled at me when she found out...)

Anyways we had fun.... we went to two toy stores to help a friend pick up something for a nephew...You should have seen Joy's eyes... they went from big to bigger at every store... I could forsee our future....I called the husband to let him know.. that we were in for a lot of tantrums.. in the near future... LOL

After all the shopping... we went to cool down at the Barista... Joys favourite... I thought he should go to his favourite place on his 9th month birthday... and yes he had his "mango smoothie" ahem.. we didn't even have to order... the guy at the place just saw us ..and got us two mango smoothies and a big slice of apple cake...

Then we came home... Joy was quite pooped by then..... and crashed out for a good two hours... I got a break too....

We came home to find a lil package awaiting us.... his D'shona had come over while we were out with a great fisher price toy and a set of clothes for him....I don't know what she will do on his 1st birthday... she celebrates his every month birthday like it was his first year birthday..... she has me quite worried....!!!!

Joy wearing the clothes and playing with the toy his D'shona gave him

Am now waiting for a friend to drop in for a cup of tea and her daughter is Joy's friend... since its miserable outside... I think they will have to make do with Joy's room and play with his million toys .....while we sip our tea and make some sensible conversation.....

Am feeling guilty I haven't baked a cake for Joy today.. I usually do.... but .. theek aache...in this heat I suppose a big hug and a kissie should suffice..

Happy 9th month birthday my baby

Just a thought

2007-06-03T07:54:00.000-07:00

A couple of days ago.. we were over at a friends place for her husbands 33rd birthday party.... This friend of mine is very close to me..... We have known each other through college and then later after marriage have again gotten in touch and our husbands get along like a house on fire and our kids are more like brothers.....however.. her lil daughter is my to be daughter-in-law....lol...

This friend has two kids... one is a two year old... the brat....and the second one a three month old lil cutie pie girl...the Bean....

Now Joy is almost 9 months old.... and he has a blast whenever he and the Brat get together.......

Getting back to what I wanted to write about....

At the party while we were sitting and chatting... my friend mentioned how our kids are almost the same age....( there was another couple over and their baby..Vidipta... is 6 days younger than Joy....).....The Brat is a lil older ....but Joy, Vidipta and The Bean are almost the same age...

My friend mentioned casually that we were lucky that atleast our kids and her second one were almost the same age....it made me think back....

Before Joy....The husband and I were pregnant once....we lost the baby.....the baby would have been exactly the same age as the Brat.....

We were four women all expecting at the same time... one friend had her baby in April and the other two had theirs in May......I didn't.... But I was there through the delivery of one of the babies...it was one of the most difficult moments of my life....

The other night ... I sat thinking.. looking at Joy and wondering.... he may have had an older brother or sister as well....

What would he or she been like....? I see the Brat play with his lil sister.... protect her..pat her to sleep....share his toys with her..... and my heart melts.....

I look down at Joy and imagine....someone doing that for him..... my eyes are all watery.....

I spoke about this with the husband....he looked at me and didn't say anything......just nodded....and then pointed at Joy doing some dushtumi.... it made us both smile... changing the mood immediately....

We sometimes think of having a second one.... a lil bonti or bhai for Joy.... actualy we are definitely going to try to have one... that decision is made....

P.s. (These thoughts..however....come to mind only when Joy is behaving himself... and being adorable .. or sleeping peaceful..... and they completely disappear when he drives us around the bend....or just refuses to co-operate)

Baaaarisstttaaaa

2007-05-30T12:09:00.000-07:00

Joy is truly a kid of this age....He is the true Gen Next. What does he like doing most.... ? Hanging out at a nearby Barista....

My mum finds the whole thing quite hilarious.... she cannot believe that I take Joy to a Barista to kill time.. on and off.. actually quite regularly....

We go very often... sometimes we are joined by friends.. some times by family .. but most of the time we go by our selves.. Just Joy and me... and if the husband can manage it.. he joins us as well....

Why do we go to Barista....? We go for a number of reasons...

1) Joy likes to go out...

2) Joy likes people...

3) The Baristas.. are not too crowded like the other coffee places.. like Cafe Coffee Day and Kosta Coffee....

4) I Like Barista..

5) They are the only place which has a High chair for lil kids..

6) They make an amazing Mango smoothie....which Joy loves...

7) In 45 degrees heat.... which sane mum would be caught outside with a lil baby... hence we seek refuge in a Barista.. which is Air conditioned...

8) The staff are nice and courteous.....

9) They give Joy freebies..

10) There is a very nice corner book store which lets Mummy read a book while... Joy is entertained by the young girls in the place or by the staff of Barista...

So !! Barista and Joy zindabad....

The other day Joy was spending the day at his D'shona's place .... so what does his Mamu do.... he takes everyone to the Barista... saying he wanted to hang out with his lil nephew... there... and also coz he thinks .. Joy is a total "chick magnet"...( his words not mine)....The husband will also vouch for this now.... cos the other day he too suddenly had lots of very cute girls coming up and chatting with him while he was carrying Joy around...

These are some pics.. of Joy and us at the Barista....

Joy with his D'shona and Mamu

Looking around

What should we order buddy?

The two of us

Joy in his high chair with the menu card

Matching....matching

2007-05-30T12:00:00.000-07:00

I have heard of sons matching their clothes and mannerisms like their dads..... but have never heard of the other way around.....

Off late the husband has been doing just that....

Check out Joy and his Dad posing on our new antique couch .....don't miss the matching outfits... both father and son are wearing red Tshirts and dark blue jeans....yes ....the father... checked out his son's outfit and then went to check his own wardrobe to see if he had something similar...cute..na?

Here is another picture of them wearing similar clothes... both are wearing white vests and blue shorts.... look at them doing kaata-kooti.....adorable....

Summer time with cousins and friends

2007-05-27T05:51:00.008-07:00

This summer has been quite bad...the weather has been pathetic....there has been no respite from the heat...despite a few showers on and off...

However, Joy is lucky to have spent his first summer ever with friends and cousins..who have been dropping in .... or to whose houses he has been visiting.....and has been having a blast....

Here is Joy..with his cousin... Sunaina didi..... She came visiting with her grandmom... my aunt and Joy and she played the whole afternoon.. and then we went to the park as well.... Look at her protecting her lil cousin brother.. so cute...

Then at the park... Joy also met up with his friend Leela... and then they all walked around the park and the two girls played ..while Joy watched....

Joy...also was visited by his older cousin Meghna Didi..and Kunal dada... who came to spend the day... While Kunal Dada was busy watching the India -Bangladesh Match and on and off keeping an eye on Joy... Meghna Didi had a lot of fun.. rolling around on the floor with Joy and playing with his toys....

Tubby car

2007-05-27T05:11:00.000-07:00

Lately Joy has started emptying out one of the tubs which holds his toys and then getting into it. He makes the maid drag him around the house as if it were his car.... he is such a funny kid... and goes Aaaaaaaa all the while.....

Yesterday , I found that not ony was he inside the tub....so were a few of his belongings....

The maid informed me that....."babu(she calls him that)...neeje ei shobh tub e dhukiyeche.." (apparently ..Joy had put these things inside the tub himself...and refused to budge unless they also made their journey in the tub around the house with him.) When I heard this .. I was quite amused.... these things were ... a pair of his shorts.. yellow ones...a yellow rattle...a yellow stuffed toy and a teether......yellow must have been the colour of the day.

The maid is quite happy to drag him around or push him around ..whichever is required.. coz it also permits her to finish her work and keep an eye on him... put him into it... and he still can't get out... though at the rate at which he is going.... it wont be long...

Then we will just have to find something else to keep him occupied with....so untill then....Joy and his Tubby car are all over the house...

Water baby!!!

2007-05-25T04:30:00.000-07:00

After our two lil holidays we have realised that Joy is a water baby.... he loves the water....

From when he was a few days old... he loved being bathed... he would sit still in his bath chair.. while we bathed him....only deciding to slide his lil chubby legs off when he didn't like what we were doing.. which would usually be .. scrubbing behind his ears... or rubbing shampoo on his head....

Look at him enjoy the water..... when he was lil....

Joy being bathed by his Baba at 2.5 months

Joy sitting like a king in his bathing chair at 6 months

The first time we put him into a swimming pool... we did so with some apprehension... we weren't worried about the water being unclean ..or... that he might get a cold.... actually those thoughts didn't even come to my mind... I had to hear a lot from people later, saying that I shouldn't have taken the risk of putting him into a public pool ( it was the hotel pool ..but whatever!!!) at such a young age....

We were more worried .. that he would be scared and yell his lungs out.. and then never want to go into a pool after that.....but thank god.. he didn't do any of the above....

He loved the water... almost dived in.... and refused to come out....

Check him out in Surajgarh :

This was his first time in the pool

We found him to be a natural swimmer.... his legs moved automatically..... we even bought a set of arm floats for him....but they were a lil too big... hence we had to hold on to him....

My mum picked up the cutest pair of trunks for her grandson.... from Mumbai.... I haven't seen a baby look cuter before...

In Nalagarh.... he took one look at the pool and let out a WHoop!!!!of joy.... he was so thrilled... we put him in the water everyday..... his floats fit this time and he splashed around and teased both the lil girls who were in the pool with him.. show off!!!!

Joy in the water in Nalagarh

We plan to take him to the club so that he can swim and beat the heat..... but then also felt ..that he needn't wait till his parents took him to the pool... so we made the pool... ahem a paddle pool come to him.....

In his paddle pool

Now whenever he passes the paddle pool kept in his bathroom... he screams out in Joy... he is now usually seen dragging the maid towards his new found form of fun.....

When the husband heard how much of fun his son had in his lil paddle pool...I was called to keep everything ready.....he wanted to be there for his son's evening bath and playtime yesterday....
They looked so cute.. I was quite sure father and son would both get in to the paddle pool... but I think the husband realised ....he wouldn't fit into the pool ....whichever way and however much he tried....LOL.....

Baba and Joy at bath time

Look at my water baby......

A trip to Nalagarh

2007-05-24T03:17:00.000-07:00

Some time in March I had written about this trip the husband, Joy and I had made to this heritage fort called Surajgarh.....and I had ended by saying that I was hoping we could do it more often..... well... We did....

We went to this heritage for called Nalagarh.....Its at the foothills of the Kangra Valley about 40 mins from Kalka....and this time we didn't go alone .. but with some other like minded friends and their lil babies...

On the 11th of April....Two other couples... close friends and us... along with three babies reached the New Delhi Railway Station at 7.40 am... to catch the Shatabdi Express looking forward to a much needed two day break. All of us had had a tiring time the past few months and wanted to unwind ...which also meant..no answering doorbells... giving maids instructions... no relatives and families to please... just us and yes our babies... so actually it wasn't going to be too much of a dream holiday.

The three of us on the train

Anyways... for two of the babies on the trip it was going to be the first time they were going to travel by train.... so more than them... we were excited and also a bit apprehensive.... Atleast I was.... It had been some time since I had been to the station let alone get into a train.... but ....The train was spic and span... and the waiters very very courteous...

The trip to Kalka was quite relaxing in itself....we were finally off.. for our holiday.... the train was on time... the kids were behaving themselves... in 5 hours we would be at our destination... it was bliss..

Upon reaching Kalka ...the 6 adults and 3 kids got into a Qualis and drove off for a 40 min drive to our heritage hotel.

Nalagarh was this place I had come across while trying to kill time when I was preggie... and I had it saved in a list I had made last year,.... After our Surajgarh trip I was just going through the list to see possible places to visit with babies and not to far away.....Nalagarh seemed like a good place to begin.

Early morning walk with Joy

Our friends.....two couples... one with a baby girl 6 days younger than Joy and and one with a 2 year old toddler.

The kids... enjoyed the pool and so did we... the food here was ok.. like home cooked... the service... courteous..and more than anything we were just let to be ourselves.. with no schedules to follow and no routines to go by..... we did what we wanted....( actually what our babies wanted)......ate, slept...swam..sat around and chatted.... the ones with a bit more energy played a few games of badminton... took a few walks... otherwise.... after dinner... we just sat and enjoyed our selves... we even tried a round of dumb charades.... which was fun....

Here are some pics... of the trip.....

Joy in the water...don't miss his new floats

Evening Chai

Leela and Joy bonding

The sunset from our terrace....the two of us pose.. while Joy looks on

5 years.....

2007-05-24T02:15:00.000-07:00

Two days ago.....I don't knowwhat came to my mind..... but I just felt... it would be nice to get pampered.... so... I sent the husband an sms mentioning flowers and chocolates... knowing that he must have had a pained expression on his face when he read it... he is so not the flowers and chocolate type.... but I thought.... what's the harm in trying....

I honestly had forgotten about that sms.....

That evening ... when the door bell rang ...I was looking like a rag ...still in my kaftan and an apron .....we were going to have some surprise relatives stay over for dinner..I had been informed of their plans after the cook had been shooed off for the day saying ..."aaj kuch nahin banana hain" and I had sent over Joy and the maid to my mums for some peace and quiet...as well as a chance to make a few presentable things to put on the table...so I just about managed to open the door and sight that greeted me ... was someone I loved standing there holding on to a beautiful spray of the most pretty yellow carnations and a box of After Eights...my favourite.....with a silly smile on his face..... what more could cheer up a harrassed mom...on a stressfull day....

The husband had stopped on his way home from work and picked up my favourite flowers and chocolate for me... he called on his way home and checked where I was... and despite my telling him to pick up the baby and the maid on his way back came straight home to me.....

Now, I haven't had the time to check my mail or even go online in the past few days.... what with Joy getting a slight heat rash.... teething .....the weather making him cranky and trying to entertain him indoors and finding things to do when he looks at his stroller at 5.30 pm.....waiting to be taken to the park is quite tiring....hence despite my computer staring at me.... I wasn't online...

I read his blog today and read something he had written.....on the day he got me my flowers..... it had really been 5 years since we had first met......It had completely slipped my mind.... but apparently not his.....

I am glad I met him...I am glad my mum buldozed me into considering his family's proposal.....I am glad I married him..despite finding his name weird....I am glad we were able to give each other love and also the most precious gift of all.....

our Son....The Joy of our lives....

Update on Joy

2007-04-21T10:35:00.000-07:00

This is a quick update for all family and friends who keep asking about Joy and his progress...
well.. He is now about 9 kgs in weight...he can sit straight by him self...

Sitting up straight

is trying to crawl properly... not totally mastered it yet... but can swim on his chest ....and his latest is a frog leap.... and boy!! is he quick...

He crawled off the mattress

He likes to stand holding on to either someone or something....

Standing up in his cot

He is teething like no ones business... drool happenning all over.....everything and anything goes straight into his mouth...

Drooling all over the place....lil Napoleon

His hair has increased in length... as in he is still pretty bald.. but whatever was there has grown....
His vocal chords are strong and he imitates any sounds you make...
He loves playing Tooki... as in Peeka boo....

Playing Tooki in the beanbag

He has started eating different kinds of food.. he enjoys his breakfast.....thats his favourite meal... it usually consists of a puree of bananas or strawberries or apple...sometimes all mixed up as well...
He loves his lunch, which is usually rice based... initially it was khichri...but now he prefers curd rice....
He snacks on cheese slices , boiled carrots and some digestive biscuits...
His dinner is usually a pish pash of veggies and rice...
If he is a good boy he gets .... some custard... he loves it.... :-)

Joy enjoys his time in the park..every evening at around 6 pm...he is put into his stroller and taken to the park.. he has a play date there with some friends....

With Leela in the Park

Playing with a friend

So ... Joy is doing good.... thanks for all the love, wishes and blessings everyone

Joy with his lil Drum

It's my choice...and am happy....

2007-04-21T09:27:00.000-07:00

I haven't written for a while .. now... I keep planning to write ..but something or the other always seems to come up.... and I forget ....
I have been meaning to write on a particular issue for quite some time.... something I read on a friend's blog..got me all charged up.... I just had to write after that....
The issue is about Stay at Home Moms and Working Moms.....
I have been reading a lot on these topics lately and also sitting in on conversations and discussions.... I have worked non stop for 4 years ... and now since I have been pregnant with Joy I have been a SAHM.....
I stopped work in October 2005...actually even before I conceived Joy.. it wasn't planned .. it just happened... We had just moved and I was settling in to a new city and the month I started circulating my resume and scheduling meetings ..was also when I realised I was pregnant ..... hence work went onto a back burner coz I just felt it wouldn't be ethical to join a place and then go on maternity leave....( actually who would appoint a pregnant woman anyways....)

Ok.. to get back to the main topic... I now am home with Joy.... I enjoy my time with him... but I also enjoyed my time at work... I teach and so my work anyways entails interaction with children.....
The husband knows this and realises that even though I am enjoying my stint at home ... I am also looking forward to going back to work....
I keep reading about how moms are "sacrificing their lives " for their kids when they stay at home.....and also the flip side.. of how there are moms who feel guilty leaving their kids and going back to work.....

Everyone seems to be justifying their actions... Why?
If you are a SAHM .... you have chosen to be one.... If you are a working mom ... its coz you have chosen to be one... be it for some compulsions ... or whatever..... !!!!
Why does one need to justify their actions.... ? As long as the decision you have taken is yours and by yours I mean a family decision... no one needs to be given any reasons for it....

The husband and I from day one ..have known .. that I would go back to work in a year or so after our baby was born...
not for financial reasons.... (thank god.... for that....) it has never been a concern..we make do with what we have ... The husband and I have been sensible with our finances... Yes... we do splurge.. pretty often that too...but thats cos we want to....we both love food ... we love travelling and don't compromise on our budgets for that....we both love the good life....but we also know what we can do and what we cant.... for eg : we bought a small car... not coz we couldn't afford a big one.. but cos... we didnt need one at that point...we will now buy a bigger car... cos we need it... with a baby and his paraphenelia as well with me going back to work....its a necessity...
I will go back to work for myself.....I can hear people saying .."How selfish!!" Fine , think what you want to....It's my decision and I don't care what others think.....
I love my son... and I don't feel that by going back to work my love for him will become less or that by spending every hour with him will make him realise how much I love him.... I am sure he will love me and I him even if I went to work for 5-6 hours a day.... Someone said.. it was all ok for me .. as the work I did was just for half a day and not like others who have full 9-5 jobs... well.... it doesn't matter how many hours I work.... or stay at home.. as long as I can ensure that my child is in safe hands and happy ,I am fine....
My mom worked through out our childhood and still does...and I am glad she does..... I am sure I would have been glad even if she didn't.... It is completely her decision..
We never had problems with her working.... I sometimes .. hear my friends complain that they never saw their moms and that they were looked after by the servants...

Well.. my brother and I have always seen Mom going to work...but she was always there when we needed her....even if she wasn't there physically she could be contacted when ever required.. we too were left with servants... they were more like family members for us... some of them are still with the family and are actually looking after the next generation ..as in our kids now....

Another friend told me .. that by staying home .. she was ensuring that she would be there to watch her child take her first step.. or say her first words...I am home right now and Joy has started saying a few things... and let me tell you ... they have always been in front of someone else... when I have either gone to the loo or am on the phone....the first time he crawled was while we were on vacation...
So I guess its the way you look at things.....

If going to work is making me happy then in some way or the other it will make my child happy as well.... I have never come back from work in a bad mood... in fact I have always come home very very satisfied and rejuvenated.... and I think Joy will want a Mom who is in a good mood... and not a grouchy and irritable one .. like I am sometimes.. after a trying day with him....or after supervising the laundry and the cooking and the cleaning......
I have delegated all these tasks now.. so that they are all taken care off to my satisfaction and am very happy....

This brings me to another conversation I had with a few friends.... on how their husbands had put their careers on a slower pace just so that they could be with their kids for everything.... This is one thing which is very personal.....
The husband loves his job..... he too comes home after a full day of work... looking forward to the time he will spend with his wife and son.... His work makes him travel often....and I have never tried to put a stop to it .... if thats what his work entails ..then he has to travel....If his work makes him move cities ...then we will move with him till it becomes difficult...... before we got married ... I decided to change careers and chose to teach so that I could move with him whenever required.. I have never cribbed about what I had to do.. it was my decision....and am happy with it...
One of the reasons , we work is also to provide for a better future for our children... provide them with some kind of security ..our parents gave that security to us....made us stand on our own feet and then let us be..... we aim to try to do at least that.
I am always being told that the love and affection that a child gets from a mom who is home all the time is different... how so?
It's the way each of us perceive our roles as parents.... it's the way we want to bring up our child... it's our decision.....and that is that...!!!
The bottom line is that .... Its a personal choice.... to each their own.....you have made a choice ..be positive about that choice if its what you think is the best choice...
why the slanging match ? and
why the comparison ? and
why the debate?

Weekend trip

2007-04-10T09:37:00.000-07:00

The weather was becoming horrid.... and I was at my wits end.... I hadn't had a total holiday for a while now.. almost a year....when the Husband and I went to this heritage hotel for a night and two days.... that was when I was preggy with Joy in my tummy...I htink it was around this time of the year as well...
Now, people look at me in amazement when I crib about not having a holiday.... coz everyone knows about my frequent trips to Kolkata... the Husbands family home.....
Yes... I have visited very often after Joy's birth... but those have been either a necessity as in some form of celebration or festivity....or to let Joy spend some time with his grandparents and great grand parents..... They have been very very pleasant..... but not really holidays... at least not for me.... I felt as thoughI was doing much more than how much I did at my own home..

Hence.. I used to crib.... and finaly... we did go for a break... albiet.. only for a long weekend... The good Friday-Easter weekend.. just gone by....

The Husband had wanted to surprise me by taking us for our Anniversary...but poor thing when he called to book.. he found them all booked up... but anyways... he managed to get us a lovely double suite for this weekend.. and yes ..WE WENT...!!!!

Joy and his Baba at a roadside Dhaba

We went to this small little principality.. called SURAJGARH.... its a lovely quaint little fortress.. as the management would have us beleive... but well its more like a Haveli...
nonetheless let me tell you more about our trip...

Surajgarh Fort

We left Delhi in our sweet Alto....with Joy in a borrowed Infant seat from another blogging friend and college mate.....he didnt really take to the infant seat very well...one because ..he has never sat in it before...two because.. it faces the rear window and not his parents..and three he is just a very naughty kid... however... we have to thank our friends for letting us borrow it.... it atleast gave us a break now and then..

The drive according to the brochure.. should have taken 3.5 hours.. but well we needed almost 5.5 hours..( yes...we did get lost but only for ten mins or so..). To give credit to the Haryana roadways and government... the roads from Gurgaon till Narnaul..were very good..... after Narnaul.. we moved into Rajasthan....and the road became miserable.....
So,.... we reached around lunch time.... and sat down after freshenning up ..and hogged.... Daal baati, churma....lal maans..... kheer
After that heavenly meal.. all the husband and I wanted to do was to curl into the very very inviting bed and sleep....but..... well it wasn't just the two of us anymore ..was it..???? NO siree.....
We had "our bundle of joy"...who refused to sleep himself and didn't let us sleep either... in the end.. we were sitting on two sides of the HUGE..read gigantic bed....trying to save him from falling off... Why???? Of all the places... he learnt to crawl HERE!!!!!!

Joy starts to crawl

Anyways... finally we made him get into his new lil trunks and tried to make him wear his floats ...ahem..!!! which were just too big.. they came till his fingers... much to the husbands relief.. who was looking very unhappy at being given the task 0f blowing air into them....so got saved...

Joy in the pool for the first time

Anyways.. our son loved the water.... he almost dived into the pool... we literally had to hold on to him for dear life.... he splashed around and was constantly moving his pudgy lil legs .....and kept giving the other older kids in the water these devilish grins....the lil girls were totally floored.. and all swam over to cooo over him.... I tell you .. kids nowadays... are born flirts...
Anyways after a while in the pool ,we yanked Joy out and he had his first shower with daddy and mommy.....actually he had his first every shower.. all this time it was a bath in a bathing chair and then funtime in his lil tub.... so he freaked out in the shower... almost started singing....

Sure enough after all this activity ..he fell asleep over his dinner and we were only too relieved... to lay him down on the bed and catch a breather ourselves...

Fast asleep......thank god!!!!

While we sat together and saw some TV and then wandered outside into the baithak area where there were nice straw tables and chairs laid out for a late evening tea.... we found ourselves discussing... the feasibility of brining along a maid with us the next time we venture out to such places... Now Joy is only 7 months old..and we were going mad... we could not visualise our state when he would be running around... and climbing into things and out of them.....That would be no holiday at all...

Joy and the armour suit

Now when I write this post I am suddenly reminded of my friend's post on their Mall experience with their two kids... one a few weeks old and one almost 2.... and how her husband had said .. very diplomatically that too... "It was a highly avoidable experience".....and how much I laughed 'coz I could visualise and even hear the two of them say that.... my friend was much more colourful in her description of the experience...though ..Ahem...!!
So by Day 1.5 of our holiday... The Husband and I were at a concensus.... NEXT.. time... either we leave JOY with either one of his ever loving Grandparents ..or we take the maid...!!!! Good....at least that is settled..

The Husband enjoying the fresh air ... Joy enjoying his Baba's jeans....

Anyways the next day... we lazed around... as in we tried to laze around... JOy was up at 6 am... so I took him outside to the Jharokhas.. where there were some other early risers.. who held out their arms to Joy and HE went... they were sweet ..and told me to go and rest they would take him around for a while... This was a sweet enthu cutlet auntie and her even more enthu family.... you know.. the types .one avoids on holidays.... but .. for once.. I was happy they were there... Joy went with them to the lawn... watched the family play cricket at 6 am... while I sat and had my morning cup of tea...and watched frmo the floor above and The husband... got to sleep for a while longer...about ..15 mins... it seems .. he just couldn't sleep after that... I think a routine has set in for us... we just can't sleep past 6.30 am even on a holiday... poor us..!!!

Joy watching the game at 6 am..

It seems Joy behaved like an angel with the Enthu cutlet family... the minute the husband went to get Joy back.. he growled at him and looked very upset....( Must also tell you ..that the Enthu cutlet family also asked the husband to join them in their game... LOL... can you imagine the Husbands expression.. he made some silly excuse..about feed time.. and ran for his life...)

Anyways.. we then rested ... ate the most gigantic breakfast of four egg omlettes... which were divine... and aloo paranthas... these were the options with fruit and cereal... we jumped the latter and hogged on amazing quantities of the former two.... couldn't even talk after the meal.... thank fully Joy also was a bit sleepy..so we all napped...
Woke up and took Joy for a pre lunch stroll... he didnt like it much cos... the sun was too strong.. and kept getting into his eyes.. and we refused to carry him ..so he was stuck in hs stroller...

Grumpy Joy

Then it was lunch time ...so we ate again..... then napped again....
then at around 5 pm... took Joy down to the Pool ... here again he enjoyed himself... and so did we...
After the swim we went down to join an activity organised by the hotel.. a camel cart ride.. through the little town... It was fun... JOY was quite taken in by this huge creature.. who kept making weird noises and peeing.....and crapping... and at the same time... took us for a very bone shaking ride through the town..

The Chaudhuris on a camel cart

We relaxed in the evening and watched a cultural show put up by the hotel.. there were fire eaters and blowers, dancers with multiple pots on their heads....lots of stuff....

Cultural Programme

The high point of the evening was our Enthu Cutlet Aunty...who appeared again and took over the show..she had decided that all the guests who were there needed to interact.. and that we must play some games together and even had some silly prizes... there were to be childrens games as well as games for the women and the men and again as couples...
The Husband... heard the plan and took refuge in the room...and tried to watch the match...and I was stuck with Joy outside...
Anyways... Joy fell asleep after a while and we ate a good wholesome dinner... the hotel had also put up a pasta station and some baked veggies to give everyone a change and the food was really good.
The next day....as usual we were up at 6 am.... fed Joy....put him to sleep for a short nap...ate a good brekker and were ready to leave...
The drive back was uneventful.... a quick stop for a cola...and then a diaper change pit stop...and we were already entering Gurgaon... We checked our watches and found we were back by 1 pm.. there was no lunch organised for us at home.. and it was amazing how both the husband and I looked at each other and said .. Al Kauser.. at the same time...we stopped picked up a few rolls.. and went straight home..

Joy was thrilled to see the maid and ate his lunch quietly and then started doing his "dushtumi"...we tried to put him to sleep.. but he just refused.... So then I called in reinforcements... the ever willing Mama and D'shona.. who it seems had missed Joy to bits..
My sweet brother picked up Joy and the maid and took them over ..while I slept and the husband relaxed...

Joy snacking on his moms cheeks

The holiday was a good break... we had a good time..despite the initial hiccups.... and now am raring to go on another one..
The one thing we missed on this vacation.. was more like minded company... it would have been lovely to relax in the evening over a drink with friends.. all worries over... kids put sleep... peace and good adda...
So thats my next project... to mobilize our group of friends and plan another trip like this one... somewhere not to far.... reasonable.. and a relaxing holiday.....

Gandhi giri

2007-04-10T08:27:00.000-07:00

The first film we saw with Joy was Lage Raho Munna Bhai...and loved the Gandhigiri bit....

This is our tribute to The Mahatama and ....ahem !!!Munna Bhai

See no Evil

Hear no Evil

Speak no Evil

2007-03-26T06:22:00.000-07:00

Joy and I at his Kolkata Party

Everyday.. I look down at my son and marvel at what perfect little creation he is ....

I say it aloud... and am rebuked by my mother who says I shouldn't say anything too good about him.. as "Nozor lege jaabe...." and proceeds to spit over his head or if by chance he has a bout of sneezees... or coughing.... she makes the maid burn some Lonkas ( Chillis) on the tava over the flame... to "cataoe the nozor"( change the evil eye)......

All this makes me look with amazement and shock at my mother ...who isn't from the boon docks.... as one in today's world would think she is from when they read this....but a very highly educated woman... an individual of repute in her own right... a University Professor...a writer.........when I confronted her with all these weird beliefs and practises... she had just one answer..... "I am Joy's grandmother...his D'shona.... . I will do whatever I can to protect him from evil....so what if you find them weird.." Well !! what does one say to that....?

This is something I have always wondered.... How can a mother's or for that matter even any parent's "nozor" be harmful to their child....? After all if we don't look out for our child then who will...If we don't admire our creation.....then no one has the right to do so either.....Why is it that when someone gets married in Bengali tradition .. the mother of neither the groom nor the bride attend the basic religious ceremony.....? Would any parent want to miss such a momentous occasion in the lives of their children...? Your child is going to be starting a new phase in his/her life....don't you want to be there to encourage and cheer them on... if not to bless them...?
Now I will not say that I only admire my son or only talk about him being amazingly amazing.....and beautiful..... I also am the first to criticise him... When he spits in my face.... when he refuses to eat.. when he yells for no reason...when he does what he is shown not to do.... I am the first one to tell him he isn't doing the right thing.... he isn't being a good boy ..or whatever....Surprisingly .. even then... I am told that I shouldn't tell him off... as that too is "nozor"..VERY STRANGE!!!

So basically, a parent isn't supposed to say anything ...good or bad about her/his child....However I think ..actually am sure this rule holds good for only the initial years , because I am positive that when the child grows up.. and misbehaves... the parents will be blamed for his/her indiscipline and rude behaviour....

Anyways.... I am a proud parent and want to show off... here are some Photographs of Joy.... see them and agree with me....

Joy in December..Yes!!! he had declared summer

Joy doing "Dushtumi"

And more "dushtumi"

Playing in his Play Gym.

P.S......I do put a Nozor teep on his forehead... Just in case... you never know.. Na?

Daddy....

2007-03-26T02:25:00.000-07:00

We were to go and watch The Namesake over the weekend.... and I hadn't read the book till then... so I made it a point to read it ASAP....

Am glad I did....The book was fabulous.... I couldn't put it down.... I felt criminal..when I would find excuses to leave my son with the maid... just so that I could go and finish reading the book.... There were times when I would just read the words and see the whole story happen in front of my own eyes..... I could see a number of people I knew ..I loved...I missed.... in the pages of that book.....
Most of all my Father..... Daddy.....

Its been seven years since we celebrated his birthday with him......he's been gone for almost seven years now.....but even today when I go over to my mum's place... I expect to see him sitting on his chair in the living room watching cricket or chatting with someone or the other.....I still expect to be asked "Hey! T ... pour me some T..." with a grin on his face... I still expect to see him walking around the dinning table when we eat..straightenning the table mats , forks and spoons..... I still hear him call my brother "minky"....I still see him giving a look of exasperation -looking at my Dida laying out a lunch consisting of 15 different dishes when he had categorically asked her to make just two...I still hear him ask my Thakuma to make "maacher jhol with bori"... I still see him pouring himself a cup of tea at the dining table and stirring in the sugar noisely till all the sugar dissolved ..much to my irritation...I still see him playing with my lil neices and nephews.....showing them the cars that passed by... I still hear him teaching them to stand at attention and call him "commando dadu....." which in turn made my poor mother "commando thakuma" for no fault of her own.....I still see him.... hear him .....and ....feel him....

He would have been 57 on the 23rd of March....I miss him a lot.......

As I was reading The Namesake...I missed him all the more..... Jhumpa Lahiri.....took a few chapters out of my life when she wrote that book...... I immediately telephoned my brother and asked him to read the book..... knowing that he would understand what I was feeling.....

Now when I look down at my son....I miss Daddy all the more...He isn't there to play with his grandson....he isn't there to show him how to stand straight... chest out ..stomach in......he isn't there to show him the cars and race with him like he did with my brother....he isn't there to be called 'Dadu'...he isn't there to see his grandson twirl the lil lock of hair on his forehead the same way he used to do........

This year Joy sent some beautiful flowers to his Dadu on his 57th birthday.....and you aren't here to give him a hug...Daddy...... It's just not fair....

This year Ma gave an insertion for you Daddy.... it went like this...

CDR. SUBROTO GUHA

( 23.3.1950 - 19.11.2000)

It is your 57th Birthday toay. Your grandson is six months old and the apple of everyone's eyes. How sad it is that he will never know his Grandpa. We miss you at all times and wish you could share in the happiness this bundle of joy has brought to our lives.

Sameer , Trishna , Dipta, Dyujoy, Latika , Nandini

yeh..kya hua ?

2007-03-23T03:21:00.000-07:00

Yesterday..I was home alone... the husband ..at work and the maid and lil Joy at my mum's place... spending the day....so I got a few hours to myself... to organise my life a bit at home... rest and sit alone with a book( The Namesake....wanted to read it before I saw the film) and a cup of tea....
It was heaven.....!!!

However....I also got some time to sit and just think....think about how life has changed and how priorities have changed....and how we had changed....

Life.... for starters...had changed .... We were not just the two of us anymore... We were the three of us... we were a family....Our day started much earlier than it did earlier and never seemed to end.... what with night feedings...potty.... and colic..and the lil one's bursts of energy at 3 am...

If we go out it has to be a table for 4.. not two ..not three... but four... as we need space to keep the baby's basket and all the other stuff we have to cart around wherever he goes..... Now that he is almost 7 months old...and starting to move around... and diving for whatever is in front of him.... we have to choose our places with care.... we dont want to end up paying more for the broken crockery than the meal itself...

Earlier, The husband and I would sit in our living room and admire our collection of Van Goghs ( prints.. ..what did you think?).now.... we stand next to our lil son sleeping in his cot... and admire our creation...

Earlier , a weekend for us would mean waking up late and lazing around the house ..not taking baths ...or watching back to back movies either at home or in a multiplex... Now... , a weekend for us, means waking up at the crack of dawn to clean him after his morning potty or just playing with him..., having to bath despite not wanting to... thanks to drenching ourselves while bathing him, going out to the park with him in a stroller....to show him the wonders of nature.. or just to take him outside the house...catching a film on DVD is difficult nowadays.... we have to watch the film in installments.... We have been adventurous and taken him along to watch a few films... but now that he is so fidgetty ... its getting all the more difficult...

Priorities ......have changed....earlier.. we would plan to go off on weekends just the two of us... even..now its not impossible but just a little difficult... we could earlier just go off to some place and slum it... now not possible.. the place has to be clean... baby friendly and have stuff to entertain him as well. We would plan to go for a few holidays by ourselves... now we try and visit family so that they can also get to spend time with their grandson.....and see him grow...

Earlier we saved to buy and invest in Art... now we save to invest in a bigger and more practical car....we would go and pamper ourselves with our hobbies... be it books or movies or eating out or ... even a trip to the salon.... but now.. we pamper our son... we try and give him whatever we can... whatever we want him to have... this sometimes entails us going without a few things.... but we don't think twice... This is a time when we realise how much our parents must have given up or as some say " sacrificed" for us....and value them for all that.....

Earlier ..a shopping trip would entail trips to the book shop or a designer store or a home store.... nowadays a shopping trip entails... heading to the children's section in a store...or going to a KIDS SHOP....or entering a regular grocery store and instead of enquiring about milk or eggs.. asking if the supply of pampers or lactogen had come in....

Earlier shopping would mean shopping for ourselves or gifts for friends and family now .. it is usually only for our son... and sometimes... birthday presents for his friends ... our friend's kids....I am even stocking up on certain things I like and that might only be used when he is 2 years old....

Earlier we would ask for tickets in a movie theatre ..specifying that we want the last row and towards the centre .. for better viewing.. now we ask for seats near the exit closest to the toilet....

On a flight we would ask for seats up front and a window if possible and not over the wing.......now we categorically ask for aisle seats at the back near the loo.... Earlier we flew budget airlines.. and looked at the Business class passengers thinking .. they fly this way only 'coz their company's paying for it ...

now..... We fly business class... and we pay for it ourselves... just so that we get extra room for our son and he has a more comfortable flight....

Earlier , the husband would call me every few hours to check how and what I was doing.. or just to hear my voice.. now... he calls and yes and does ask what I am doing....( I think he knows me too well... not to)...and also asks how his son is doing and what were our plans for the rest of the day...( not my plans .. please note the diplomacy)

Earlier.... we would go out partying to some hip n happenning club or bar .... now we get together with our friends who are in similar family situations at each others homes.. where we can put our respective babies to sleep and relax over a glass of wine and some chit-chat.

Earlier our conversations amongst friends would range from fashion, to politics , to cricket, to the stock market ..to social causes... now it still revolves those things...

but while we speak of fashion ..we speak of dearth of good and reasonable childrens clothing or the lack of fashionable maternity wear....and how to order good baby slings online....

when we speak of politics.. we speak of how...the entire school admission procedure has been politicised... and fear that our kids will never be able to get admission into a decent school of our choice...

when we speak of cricket.. we speak of the dismal condition of sports in India and how may be our kids should become sports commentators and journalists....

when we speak of the stock market.... we talk of putting away money or investing in plans for our kids... for their education and future.....

when we speak of social causes... we dont talk of AIDs prevention or pollution ...or judicial activism....we speak of stem cell research..and cord banking and breast milk donation.....

Yes..our lives have changed .. our priorities have changed....and how.....

Sometimes , on a particularly difficult day... I ask myself.. if it was all worth.. it...

.....then I look into the Husband's eyes across the dining table...and see the understanding....and gentle look he gives me ....when I wake up at night to find .. him patting our son back to sleep quietly ..trying not to disturb me....when he stands behind me .. and rubs my back or just says .. " come here buri.. let me give you a hug"......or makes me turn around and look at our son's excitement at spending time with us together.....

Well... yes....It is... It is worth it ... I don't mind all the changes and all the difficult times.... looking at the two most important people in my life...it is all worth it.....definitely worth it.......

It's a girl....

2007-03-15T01:09:00.000-07:00

Yipppppeeee!!!!!
She has had a little girl........and... thank god!!!!!!!(All the pink stuff I bought for her will now be used)
and yipppeeeee!!!! once again....
am off to see my friend and to be daughter-in-law now......!!!!
Lil...Joy.....we have a bride for you now..... and the parents get along..... very rare,...... indeed...
Congrats Mad Momma , OA and lil Brat!!!

Mad Momma

2007-03-15T00:59:00.000-07:00

One of my best friends is about the have her baby as we speak.... Have been to see her ... they hadn't wheeled her in to the OT then... but she is in now.. and we are still waiting.....
Am praying for her.... hope she has the lil girl she has been dreaming off...All the Best ! MadMomma.....

Joy of everyones lives...

2007-03-10T22:01:00.000-08:00

Joy at 5 months

Joy and I spent two weeks in Kolkata... his Grandparents live there ( The husbands parents).
I don't think Joy and I spent even one boring moment....
Come 5 am... it was good morning time.... for everyone... the Lord was awake and not willing to lie next to his mommy quietly..... Mommy would sit with him near the french windows and show him the trees and the green leaves and the crows..( there were no other birds...)...and lil Joy would gurgle.. and chuckle away....
Come 6 am... Mommy could take it no more..and lil Joy would be deposited with his water bottle and a few toys in his grandparents room ..who welcomed him with arms wide open...
7.30 am.. Brekker time.... Banana.....he loved it.. and would lap it up..... sitting on the balcony watching the crows and pigeons fly past ...and try and figure out where all the noise he was hearing was coming from.... the traffic and the other everyday street sounds were quite fascinating...
8.30 am... after giving his Grandfather a toothless smile.. he would take a 2 hour nap.....I slept too.... ( one of the rare luxuries..)
The Nap would be followed by a maalish and bath and another nap....
The afternoons would be lazy and spent with his grandparents or my aunts and grandmother.....
Evenings would mean shopping or visiting relatives.... lots of fun...
Joy spent a lot of time with some of the Husbands family members.... I thought I would write about his time spent with them ..

His Grandfather : Dadu : My father-in-law ...Joy's Grandfather is a fun loving person... he is a work-a-holic ( according to my Mother -in-law) who enjoys good food and loves to meet up with his friends at the club....This trip saw him return early for lunch ... as well as in the evening, so that he could spend time with his grandson.... spend a few minutes with him before his afternoon nap and also spend half an hour in the evening before Joy would go to sleep at night. I would be narrated stories of The husband's childhood at the breakfast table....and would see the pride my father -in-law had in his eyes when he spoke of his son.... and it would amuse me to see that pride... turn in to pride and joy when he would speak of his grand son.....

one lil incident is worth narrating.... The husband was once giving his son ..who must have done something silly... like spit out his food or refuse to open his mouth during a feed..... or something...a talking to and said something like " if you don't listen to me ... I will pull your ears.." and immediately there was a voice from the other room which could be heard which said... " remember that there is someone to pull ears around as well...."....cute.... na?

Joy and his Dadu

His Grand mother : Nammi : My Mother-in-law...: If there is anyone who loves The husband more than me ....it is my mother-in-law... he is her "sunshine"....or so she says....LOL....( Will let my sis-in-law comment on that)....Well.. Joy's Grandmother took it upon herself to give nicknames to everyone.... as in what Joy was to call everyone.... ( the husbands family has this penchant of giving everyone in the family nicknames...which makes it very confusing for a newcomer... am still a little lost when I meet people in Kolkata or when people are referred to in conversations.....) Anyways She named herself " Nammi".... when asked the logic.. she said ..."Thamma or Thammi was difficult for lil kids to say ...so she would simplify it to Nammi...so Nammi she is ... Joy loves his Nammi... she sings to him ..she shows him lil birdies ( she can identify other birds apart from the crow ... unlike...Ahem!!) She can do baby talk for hours on end...She is amazing at needle work.. and has made lil pillow cases and woollen sets for Joy....She was ever willing to babysit...Joy and his Nammi would spend the evening sitting on the balcony watching the world go by....

Joy and his Nammi

His Great Grand father : Boro dadu : My Grand Father-in-law : This is one gentleman whom I am in awe of.... he is gentle.. kind..knowledgable...learned.... a doctor... who does not belive in prescribing more than half a crocin or a lil boroline.... for various ailments and bruises.... who calls me up once a week to check on how I am doing .... who never wants to speak to his grandson.. though he loves him dearly.... he says " I have spoken to you... you are ok and happy.. so my grandson will be the same... I do not need to speak with him..." so sweet....
He is also quite amused at becoming a great grandfather..I remember the first trip to Kolkata with Joy ... he visited as soon as we arrived and the first thing he did was a full examination of Joy... and assured himself and me .... of Joy being healthy....and having all body parts...
It would fill my eyes with tears of joy to see him sit on a chair and see this lil bundle of Joy roll around on the bed in front of him... all the while .. having a conversation with me...
This Gentle man and I share a special bond.. not only have I married his most favourite and first grandson ... but that I also surprised him by being able to stand my own and chat with him when all the other grandchildren are a little afraid of him....He would through my pregnancy call me and ask how I was doing and what all I was eating and if I was being looked after well or not..He would follow the news seriously.... and whenever there was any storm... rain.... cold wave....political unrest... etc.. he would call to ask if we were all right....he even called once to ask if my taps had running water... he had just heard about the water shortage in Delhi... SO..CUTE..!!!!

Joy and his Shona Ma and Boro Dadu

His Great Grandmother: Shona Ma : My Grand mother-in-law : The Husband and I call her D'shona.... my mother liked the sound of the nickname so much that as soon as Joy was born .. she announced ... that now I am Joy's D'shona...LOL...and she insists on being called just that....
As I was saying.... The Husband and I used to joke about how there was the RCFC..Roon Chaudhuri Fan Club... and the President was his grand mother and Chairman was his Grand father... and how now that I was around.... they were threatening to switch allegiance.....all except his grandmother...
She is the only one even till date... who first enquires about her Grandson before her Great Grandson......She dotes on lil Joy.....is always praying to the Gods for his welfare....and good..

The Husband's mother's younger sister : Muma : I shall not mention the pet name given to her.... I don't think she likes it too much....lol.... this grandmother of Joys is my favourite.. she is very like me .. Bindaas... loves shoes and bags... a funny incident... happened just after I had entered their home as a new bride.. I had just entered and was being blessed by some of the elders... when I went back to wear my shoes .. I could find them no where..... they were later found on Muma's feet.... she said... the temptation at seeing new shoes was something she couldn't resist.... so what if the shoes belonged to the new bride of the house... lol...Now Muma and I gift each other pairs of shoes...it works well for both of us... Well!!! .. this Grandmother of Joys would visit almost everyday.. whenever... she could get away she would come over to see Joy and play with him....

Joy and Muma

His Ronnie kaku : the Husbands cousin... my brother-in-law: this BIL of mine is very dear.. he is my partner in crime when it comes to running off to eat Puchkas...listening to music.... teasing each other...going shopping...arriving with Rolls... whenever I would wish for them to appear.... He was also the most amazing Kaku.... he would drop in to check on his nephew.... carry him around... play with him... lie next to him... sleep on his nephews lil pillow whenever it wasn't being used...he even tried to teach Joy how to walk......I captured it on camera... a lovely pic...

Joy and Ronnie Kaku

The Husbands mother's youngest sister : Golu : What else can I say... ? She gets the news from god knows where... we are still to fathom her sources.. but she manages to call always at the right time and with the right information.... She watches NDTV india and AAJTAK sitting in Baku, Azerbaijan and Aberdeen, Scotland....and calls up as soon as rain starts in Delhi asking if I have managed to get the clothes in from the veranda...... she is just amazing...
About her and Joy... I shall only say...She bought out the entire Mothercare store in both Baku and Aberdeen.. need I say more...

Ronty Kaku and Munia bua : The Husbands cousins : My brother-in-law and lil sis-in-law : They were some of the first people I met from the Husbands family and interacted closely... I actually went and lived with them for a few days before i got married.....we had fun..... Munia was just 8 years old.... I was quite tickled at being her "boudi" and she at being my" nanad".... Both Ronty and Munia...were so amazed to see Joy that they couldn't stop smiling for their entire trip to Delhi....They were thrilled at being uncle and aunt....
Munia and The Husband have a 20 year age difference....Munia and Joy have a 12 year age difference... No guesses who will get along with whom better...

Joy and Ronty kaku

Joy and Munia Bua

The Husband's father's sister: Pishimoni: Joy's Didon: Our visit to Kolkata would have her arriving with hot samosas and jalebis for her nephew and I and she would sit and chat with us... Now being elevated to the position of a Grand mother.... she was quite kicked...Joy seemed to like being carried by her as well.... She managed to put him to sleep a number of times...

Joy and his Didon

Joy is really blessed to have so many people who love him so much.....

Joy and His Ma and Baba

His first grain of rice

2007-03-05T04:30:00.000-08:00

The three of us at Joy's Annaprashan

In Bengal it is a tradition to feed a baby his/her first grain of rice... after 6 months... its like an initiation into solid foods....
There is however a weird.... rule... for boys they are fed rice between 5-6 months and girls are fed rice at around 7 months..... god knows why....?????? I have been curious... do the food pipes differ for girls and boys.... anyways... it doesn't matter....most babies I know are on cerelac or some kind of semi solid food by 4 months anyways.. and the rice-ceremony is just a custom and is quite cute.....I have come to the conclusion that in India .....irrespective of religion .... we just need an occassion to celebrate.... be it a birth, naming ceremony, rice ceremony, upnayan, wedding,anniversary etc......not to count birthdays,festivals,rains,summer, winter,spring and autumn......
Anyways.... Joy's Rice ceremony..... it is called Annaprasan or Mukhebhat in Bangla... meaning "entry of grain" and "rice in mouth"resp.
Traditionally this ceremony is carried out in the child's paternal home where the maternal uncle is invited to feed the child his/her first grain of rice. In our case, The Husbands home is in Kolkata...so we had the ceremony there....
Joy being the first child in his generation( there is one a lil older than him.. but abroad...hence he is the eldest).....was given special treatment....
When The husband and I realised the scale at which the ceremony had been planned in Kolkata ....we immediately called up my in-laws and asked them if had lost their minds.....only to be curtly told off...." He is our first grandson"......when we persisted.....we were given logic...."he is our first grandson...since we are not Brahmans... we do not have a thread ceremony...which is celebrated in a grand way.....and we have doubts about our being there for his wedding.... so for us ....this is a BIG thing......hence... large and lavish ceremony it will be...." and it was....

There was a coctail and dinner hosted for friends and family at The Royal Calcutta Golf Club....it was beautifully done... round tables with blue ribbons , blue and white balloons..flowers and little rice lights all over...it looked gorgeous.....just like a wedding.

The Husband seeing the blessings of our Ancestors

The husband and I sitting down with Joy for the Puja

The next morning was the actual religious ceremony....it started off with a Puja done to seek the blessings of the ancestors both The husbands and mine....for our little Joy... The husband sat and did the whole puja.. which went on for almost 3 hours...

Joy and I.....watching the Puja

Then a "totto" came from his mamabari "mothers house" ..which looked like what is sent during a wedding...with a "topor".....and dhoti kurta and mojri...etc...silver and gold etc....chocolates and cookies everything....

Joy's Totto......it looked so good...

His mama..my brother...was there to feed him his first grain of rice...in the form of a payesh..rice pudding....

The Husband, Joy and his Mama.....getting ready for the rice ceremony

He's done it....Joy eating his first morsel of rice

The other symbolic part of the ceremony is the picking of an item to indicate the child future... So a silver plate is placed in front of the child... containing 5 elements like Maati...soil for property,shona/taka...gold/money for wealth,kalam ..pen for learning, dharam pustak...the Gita for religious minded and grain for agriculture .. or something of that sorts...

Well any child at the age of 6 months will lunge for anything placed before him/her.... so well so did our Joy... and he picked GOLD... The husband and I were quite relieved... "good for him.. his priorities are right from the beginning... " was the look we exchanged....He will hopefully do better than us... Both of us picked the "Pen" ..hence...our sad state of affairs....

Joy about to pick up something from the tray

He picked it up.... he picked up GOLD.... Smart boy!!

There was also this huge lunch laid out for the close family who attended the ceremony.....

Food laid out for Joy... which his Mama has to finish....

Joy's Great Grandmas......

The happiest of them all : The Husband's Grand parents......

The Husband.... Me and Our SON.......

I have been a Mom for 6 months now....

2007-03-04T20:48:00.000-08:00

This is March 2007, this time last year..we moved to Delhi.... I was three months pregnant......expecting JOY.....

I am a woman, a daughter, a sister and a wife... and six months ago... I became a mother...!!!!

This is one experience no one is ready for ... no one knows what to expect.... no one knows NOTHING ... not until you have become one yourself...
and ...
It doesn't stop there.....
Everyday...I learn something new about myself....
.... be it patience,intuition,foresight,tenderness ...
not everything is good...
.....I have also learnt that I can be and am very short tempered,a nag,irritable and sarcastic...( all the latter am sure The Husband will vouch for ..) ( My reasonning.... anybody will be all that... if they are sleep deprived...harrassed...lack adult company for 20 hours of the day( except for the maid).
For those who have read my earlier posts on pregnancy.....will know I spoke about the myths of pregnancy .... the myths and the reality....
Well !!! Being a mother is completely different ball game....
Oh! yes ... the advice from all over still flows in... on any and everything.....and yes... most of it .. helps.... experience does count... but still every child is different and every mother is different as well...
more so every parent brings up their child with best intentions and each style of parenting is unique and different..
Keeping in style with my post of myths and reality.... i shall try and sort through some of ther advice given and taken.... as well as put down some pointers for future parents ( mind you - this is not ADVICE) .

1: Don't leave home or even better your room for 40 days..... O-k-.....What about those who need to go back to work?.... What about those couples who don't have a support system?... There are some chores that need to get done like bank work...bills.... provisions....doctor visits....who will do those? Some fathers may need to travel on work or otherwise....so then who will hold fort....? ( Don't tell me that the father needn't travel.... well he has to work... of the mom is at home or on leave....some one has to make the money.... and don't tell me .. money isn't important.. IT IS ... we have to eat....we have to live.... our lives have been turned topsy turvy as it is with the new addition..... so some sanity and semblence is needed...some stability...hence daddy has to go to office...) So basically.... 40 days of quarantine....may be good for the child..may be good for the mother as she gets to rest....... but doesn't always work....

2: The mother should eat bland food.....the reason given is that the milk should not get spicy and harm the child....well...My doc categorically told us that the food I ate would not harm or affect my child.... he said ..however some foods could be avoided coz they might cause indigestion ....for me.....Anyways... in the first month or so... the new parents are so awkward.. and don't have a clue about a thing....so eating themselves is the last priority.... however... once a routine sets in.. and you start to treat your lil angel like a person and not a porcelain doll....gorging starts full time....it did for me... I was feeding so often... that I was perpetually hungry...if there was anything edible in front of me... I would eat it .
I met a few friends last night who are reed thin.... after babies... unlike me....who said that their hunger pangs had not happened... and that they hadn't felt the urge to gorge.... well...that didn't happen to me... Joy got a few stomache aches.. but not due to my food... but just colic... something almost all children get.

3.You will become slim if you breastfeed :Ahem!.... no such luck... am breast feeding and am FAT.

4. Don't worry about your figure.... running behind your child will be exercise enough... : What exercise...? Ok.. I do almost everything for Joy.. from his feeds to his maalish to his bath and cleaning routine and putting him to sleep.......my maid.. organises and arranges everything.....before I start the task.... so its not much of an effort.... Its something like someone cutting and washing the vegetables and arranging all the spices and masalas before the actual cooking begins.... then all one needs to do is stir.... easy.... not much effort... So similarly... not much effort....
also....
what running around....?....Why should I run around... when one has two part time and one full time helper in the house.. why should I need to run around?...so I don't.... hence no exercise in that way... hence am FAT....

Ok! ok!....no more cribbing......

I will however also talk about some of the good advice I got and took....

1.Sleep whenever you can : Well initially I thought that was easier said that done... how can one just go and sleep whenever your baby sleeps... doesn't one need to run the house.. supervise the help.. run errands etc.....? Well.... in the past month I have realised that everything is possible if one tries.... I was lucky I went to Kolkata to my in-laws for 10 days ... over there I didnt need to do much ..so whenever Joy slept I did too.... and boy did it make a difference... Not only was Joy sleeping longer...maybe it was my body warmth that kept him asleep.... god knows..! Now that am back.... I have been maintaining the sleep cycle for Joy and even though I can't sleep al the time... I do make it a point to sleep next to him in the afternoon... the two hour nap.. does me a world of good and gives me the energy I require for the night.

2. Make a routine and try and stick to it..: Another pearl of wisdom....when I had mentioned this to another cousin... She laughed at me and said "with kids you can't have a set routine"....BUt another knowledgable sister.... urged me to try and make a timetable.... and follow it ... Ihave and I found it amazing. It takes a while to set.... It took me a week to formulate .... lots of trials and errors happened..now we sort of have a routine... we have also been able to identify .. signs given by joy which indicate sleep, hunger and uneasiness.... as well as tantrums , potty , and jealousy( the last one has been quite an eye opener). So Now Joy has set feed timings and sleep timings as well as a set time for his bath... This has not only made life better for him but also for me and the rest of the household.

3. Both parents must reach a consensus on parenting technique : It is very important for both parents to agree on what has to be done and what should be done... they should be in sync about parenting techniques and strategies. It will be disastrous if one parent says A and the other says B. Kids are very smart .... they know exactly what to do in such situations and how to play up one against the other as well as .. which parent to go to in which situations. This consensus is also important when it comes to dealing with unsolicited advice and opinions expressed by elders and other nosy and know-it-all family members and friends.

4. Look for the most convenient methods and not be too demanding :We were told that diapers should not be used... we didn't listen...we tried all the age old methods of cloth diapers and all.. but it drove us nuts.... we ended up changing sheets and clothes through the night.... and in the bargain were exhausted and got no sleep ever... and also.. our son was fed up and cranky. We decided to use diapers and keep him in the diapers through out the day.. changing him completely every 4 hours... and also changing immediately whenever he needed it. Ok! so we spend a lot on diapers... but the money spent becomes irrelevant when you consider the amount of relief and peace it brings you. And yes ! our son did get a nappy rash once a week after being born.... we used a good nappy rash cream and that was that.....

5. Do not bundle the baby up as if he is in Antarctica : Our good doctor..was very good....he said the baby should wear the same number of layers worn by the parent and especially the father....along with one wrap.Children are heaty as it is... they sweat a lot and feel warm all the time. So if we go over board with the warm clothes.. the chances of the child getting a cold are very high..not due to the exposure to the cold but because of catching the cold due to over sweating and staying in damp clothes.

Now to give some general pointers....

1) Chill!!! Every mother is a first time mother at some point of time.....so everyone learns what to do and what not to do..... either through mistakes or just by chance and instinct.

2) For both parents the rule of the thumb should be follow your first instinct.... usually gutt feeling is the right feeling

3)Take time off as a couple even if it is for a walk or a cup of coffee or just sit in another room and chat...watch a silly film or just sit together in silence and read your own books or read a book together.

4) Try and get a good support system in place..be it helpers around the house...parents and family close by.....medical facilities within 10 minutes.....a good and reliable doctor.

Ok! I think I have cribbed enough.... given a lot of "Gyan" ( despite vowing not to give any advice).....etc..

So let me now change the topic and write another post.... and leave you with a few photographs of Joy..

Joy sitting up in his cot....He is the future rockstar in the making or so his T-shirt says..

I love this picture......round face....and toothless smile..and still very little hair

He is growing...

2007-02-24T19:44:00.000-08:00

I was just going through Joy's photo album.....He has changed..grown....looks more human....not tadpolish anymore....
Check out his progress....

Joy's first pic with his mom : Day 2

First trip to the Doctor :Day 5

Tadpole ...ET......look-a -like : Day 25

His first pair of shorts and T-shirt :1 month

Afternoon nap : 1.5 months

Filling out : 2 months

Ready for his bath : 2.5 months

First trip to Kolkata : almost 3 months

Having fun with Dad : 4 months

Bob the builder : 5 months

Where's the Party tonite? : 6 months

The little Tadpole .. isn't what he used to be..... we weren't short changed....

The Husband keeps asking me.... "Worth it ...buri ?"..... and I would never answer him.... straight away....

But.... Babu....here is my answer.... " Yes.... Definitely worth it..."

An aunt and her nephew

2007-02-17T23:28:00.000-08:00

This post is dedicated to the relationship Joy and his aunt share.....

By Aunt I mean the husbands sister..... my sis-in-law...

The Husbands family is famous for their love for sleep and when we were in Mumbai... I used to amazed with the amount both brother and sister could sleep....give them ten mins and they would be horizontal...and fast asleep....
The Husband atleast would wake up early and leave for work ..thanks to the long commute... but my sis-in-law... would wake up at 10.. and leave for work by around 12 noon.... with my work routine .. i would otherwise have been returning from work by 2 pm...
I come from a Army household.. where everything worked according to schedules and when i got married and was at my in-laws place... I used to find it weird.. that my father-in-law would leave for work and his son and daughter would wake up after he left....

However.... I have seen things change....

First let me tell you a bit about my sis-in-law...
She and I connect... as if ...we are sisters...
we like the same kind of stuff.. music... clothes...conversation.... etc.... she started writing to me even before the wedding was finalised.....
the first time we met ..we found that we even wore anklets ( one around the left ankle) which were similar...
both of us loved food.... we could talk for ages about food .... she of the more professional kind.... she was a food critic for a leading daily... and I loved to cook..... so she would keep getting me gift hampers.... and freebies... and take me out when she went to review.....pass on recipe books etc.... all of which i would welcome with open arms....
She is slim while i am not... so whenever i saw someting i could have only dreamt of wearing.... i would pick it up for..... i was one of the first to discover her romance with her now husband....( he is a sweetheart.....) we talk about various things... have cried together and laughed together..done silly things together ...
She was one of the first to know other than the Husband when we conceived lil Joy... and since we lived together in Mumbai then.. she was always there to help out and cheer me up in between bouts of sickness....

She got married when i was expecting Joy and then she moved abroad.....She and her husband have been keeping tabs on their lil nephew.... from before he was born.....I found a friend in my brother-in-law when he helped me negate some of the weird names The Husband chose for Joy...

She came visiting in December.. specially to see her lil nephew.... and i warned her.... his best time is between 4 am and 6 am..... knowing very well.. that those timings were her worst....

but.. she would wake up and come into our room without one complaint and play with him while the husband and i napped.... she gave him his bath.. fed him... cleaned him... and even rocked him to sleep..

She came laden with lil gifts for Joy....her husband it seems went shopping by himself.... and Joy loves everything they gave him.... the cool T-shirts.. the toys.... the bath buddies.... everything...

The look in his eyes when he used to see his "pinni"... was very cute.. a look of excitement...... Even now when he sees her pic... on the computer or in an album.... he grins.... dont know if he recognises her.. or just coz.. she is so pretty.... : - )

I saw the love she felt for her little nephew.. i saw the tears in her eyes when she had to leave.....

Joy really is lucky to have an aunt who loves him so much....

Dilli Haat

2007-02-17T09:30:00.000-08:00

Folk performers at Dilli Haat

When my In-laws were visiting.... I took my sis-in-law and Mother-in-law to Dilli Haat... I just love the place.... and specially now in winter ..its lovely.

This place is one of the good things done by the Department of Tourism.
When we visited this time .. there was a Master Craftsmen festival on .... it seems these happen on and off and stuff available and on display is simply mind boggling. The fact that the proceeds go directly to the craftsmen makes it all the more satisfying when one shops there.

Joy with his Aunt and Grandma

Joy loves visiting Dilli Haat..as he loves colour and the place is alive with activity and full of bright colours with all the stall from various states all done up ....live performances by folk artists ...colourful flags fluttering in the air...and lots of people roaming around....

The other good thing about Dilli Haat are the food stalls which represent the states of India . the hot favourites being the stalls from J&K for the amazing Wazwan food ...the Rajasthan stall for the daal baati and Rajasthani thali, The West Bengal stall for the Prawn cutlets and fish fry and the North Eastern stalls... particularly Mizoram and Sikkim for their Momos, Thukpas and fruit beer. The Mizoram stall has the most amazing Passion fruit juice as well.....

We are waiting for our momos

For any tourist....or as a matter of fact even for local Delhiites.. a trip to Dilli Haat is a must.
This was the first time my in-laws were visiting Dilli Haat and I could see that the decision to take them there had been correct.... they loved it ....and so did Joy and I.

The Husband who is yet to visit..... was quite inspired by the photographs ....actually I think it is the food that is exciting him more.... but what the hell.....

The festival of learning

2007-02-17T09:01:00.000-08:00

This year started off with the first little festival for us Bengalis... we celebrated Saraswati Puja..the festival in which we pray to goddess Saraswati , the Goddess of Learning on the 23rd of January.

This festival brings back childhood memories when this day meant no studies .... lol... coz.. we could put our books in front of the goddess and she would bless them. So what we as kids would do was wake up early in the morning and put our entire school bags in front of the idol hence... no books meant no studies.... when our parents started catching on to the trick... and when schools would not give a holiday...we would sulk all the way to school and con our poor teachers saying... this was a special day for us ... and that we had to by force attend school as it was a working day....and that we were forbidden to touch our books that day... the poor teachers... prefering not to hurt religious sentiments would let us off.. and .. oh! god.. am going red just thinking back how naughty we were in those days...

This day would also entail dressing up in yellow or orange clothes.... little girls would usually wear sarees and boys kurta pajama or dhotis .. other wise... just something yellow .....visiting various Puja pandals and temples and give Anjali( offerrings) in the morning and then much on the Prasad we were given by the priest....( usually cut fruit and dates with some Sandesh).....then hanging around with friends and family doing 'adda'....after the puja was over there was Bhog that was served ... consisting of 'To die for' KHICHURI....a mixture of dal andrice with lots of veggies( the Bengali Khichuri is a delicacy ..unlike what the rest of the country associate with the dish which is served in an insipid form when one is sick), Labra( a mixed vegetable) or a Aloo Phulkopir Dalna ( A potato and cauliflower curry) , Begun Bhaja ( Brinjal fritters), Tomato'r chutney ( A sweet tomato relish) . The meal would be completed with Payesh ( rice pudding) and Mishthi ( A Sweet..usually a Roshogolla).

After this heavenly meal..... a true Bong would waddle home and snooze till evening....which is what we did....

On this day little children who have reached school going age are initiated into the process of writing with a little ceremony called "Haathe Khuri" where in the priest says a mantra and makes the child write an alphabet on a slate with a piece of chalk...

This year I was in Delhi and despite it being a little too early for Joy to have his Haathe Khuri... I joined my family in the Puja.... I wore a yellow saree and made Joy wear a dhoti and kurta as well... he looks adorable... we offered Anjali and ate Prasad and also the Bhog..... My mom i found had put some of her books near the feet of the idol.... I was surprised to find not only a few Law books of my brothers but also... a History book of mine and .....Ahem .....a Math text book which she had discovered from God knows where.....when I asked her about it.... saying why put our books when both my brother and I were no longer students.... She said .... we will always be students as life is a never ending learning process and that she would continue to do so as long as she could.... it seems she has been doing so through out... without us knowing it ....

Joy and I all dressed up to go the temple

The three of us...

2007-02-17T08:28:00.000-08:00

One of the resolutions I have made and kept till date .. has been more family outings... as in lil periods of time.. where just the three of us.. the husband, Joy and I get to go somewhere by ourselves and spend quality family time together...

Being in Delhi..close to relatives and family .. we hardly get time for just the three of us ....so this winter we have been making the best of all the lovely sunshine and the lovely green gardens all laden with flowers....

We have managed quite a few sundays....in the months of December and January....and have loved the time we spent together.

Our days were leisurely....wake up late...lazy brunch and then head out ....take a walk in one of the parks... our favourites were Lodhi Gardens and The Garden of Five Senses.

We loved it so much that we even dragged some friends with us one Sunday.... and it was fun.. with the kids wanting to ride on the camels.... lazing in the sun....hogging at dhabbas ( a very swanky one that too at the Garden of Five Senses ( GOFS)).....

It was great to see Joys eyes light up when he saw the gigantic Wind Chime in the GOFS.....when he craned his neck to see the elephants and the camels...and when he closed his eyes when the sun fell on his face... and following his eyes dart from here to there....when he saw loads of other kids running around everywhere.....it was lovlely to see him cuddle up in his dads arms and doze off...

Am away now from Delhi....with Joy..missing the Husband.... and our time together.... can't wait to get back..

The New Year

2007-01-11T15:47:00.000-08:00

I just went through my blog and realised I was hopeless... since we have had Joy... I have managed to post just about once a month...and so my New Years resolution for this year is that I shall try and change that.....as in I will try and become more regular and not disappear totally...

This was our first Christmas with Joy... actually its been our first everything with Joy..so we are celebrating everything and enjoying ourselves thoroughly...
I have already posted pictures of Joy during Diwali ...so here is one on Christmas..

We spent Christmas with The Husbands family ... as in all his cousins and aunts and my -inlaws came down to visit us... and spend time with the new est member of the family.... it was great fun and we had heaps of presents under the tree...
one of The husbands aunts down from the UK... came with a gigantic suitcase filled with stuff for Joy... it looked like she had bought MOTHERCARE out...so now am busy doing up Joy's room to fit everthing in.... will post pictures soon.

I started this post by the ways on the 12th of jan.... and today is the 15th of feb.... just to let everyone know .. how hopeless i really am...
so am going to just post this and write a fresh new post asap... as in just now..

Bride wanted!!!

2006-12-06T17:25:00.000-08:00

Looking for a suitable match for only son of cool, very social, sudoku addicted and Bengali foodie parents. Age 3 months, chubby cheeks, cheeky smile, hair: silky, curly and ahem!! scant.
Very well behaved in public, though immediate family knows otherwise.
Fascinated with the light and the fan and his cot mobile. Future career - might become an electrician.
Bride should be all of the above. However a little more hair will be an advantage.
Most important criteria: Parents should gell. Otherwise, please excuse.
Please respond with photograph. Horoscopes and other stuff irrelevant.

That thing called LOVE....

2006-11-28T02:02:00.000-08:00

Reading through a friends blog got me thinking....
Love.... I have already posted on LOVE.... love for my son... a feeling I had never experienced before... love for my mom and brother and also my close telepathic bond with my mother-in-law....
And ... thought .. that it was time I spoke about the other kind of love is feel.... for this man in my life ... who for 40 % of the time drives me mad...for 10% of the time has me in splits...for 10% of the time lets me take his trip...for 40% of the time touches my heart with the care he takes of me and our son...
When I think of the pros and the cons.... well... despite the cons together seeming a lot and the pros being spread over three heads....I can negate the cons...without blinking an eyelid.
Ours is an arranged match.... we felt no such love-shove for each other before we met.. actually the only things we had in common ( discussed over a chat session after we had been formally(virtually..actually) introduced via family) were bacardi...well!! yes ... the alcohol and that we were foodies....
Each of us made a list of 10 best eateries we had visited... and had a matching list of 9 on 10....quite something I have been told by many people....
I didnt even know what he sounded like.... our only form of communication had been a few emails and smses...
So when I told him that I hadnt even heard his voice....( he by the ways didnt seem to want to hear mine....)... what does he do..? he calls me up immediately... and that too from some god forsaken place called Malda....and what does he say?... HELLO ..... am calling you from Malda... do I pass the sound check ?.....and after that silence........he didnt say anything else....I think the cat got my tongue as well... coz neither did I....

However .... that was the beginning of our courtship... both of us realised we wanted to say a lot ... but couldnt do so over the phone.... we either had to do it face to face or via a written media... even today.... most of our communication .....fights or mush happen via sms .

The first time he wrote to me ..was quite hilarious... and I have recounted this story hazaar times... He wrote.... I have been asked to write to you... Here is a little about myself...1) I own more books than clothes 2) Will grow bald by the time I am 30 ( he was 28 then) 3) I like to sleep on sundays and dont shave on that day as well.

I remember how much I smiled when I read this.. I was very amused... and thought... ok here is a honest and interesting man....
The reason I smile when I think of this even today is... the poor man ,I am sure never ever imagined.. that his Sunday sleep would be a part of history.....

coz firstly his wife was a morning person... she wakes up even today at 6 am....and would wake him up too... in the early days of marriage ..ahem !! sweetly.... then later... by calling him from the other room on his phone after getting bored watching the morning news for the 10th time....then by cracking it..... as in sitting next to him in bed and calling the world to catch up and chat on the phone.....or by cooking delicious breakfast and luring him out of bed.....
To make matters worse... he had a brother-in-law who would call on the landline...( which could not be put on silent..lol) which was kept on the bedside table next to him and yell.."Happy Sunday!!!"(Needless to say his in-laws were all morning people like his wife...)
The icing on the cake has happened since he has become a father....his son too takes after his wife......so apart from waking up his Dad at 5 am.... he demands to be cleaned at 5 am as well..... a very very plesant way to start the day.....
Poor guy....

The other thing is that he hasn't as yet gone bald.... though I know he will someday.. as it is hereditary.... but well... not yet....
He by the ways nowadays is compelled to shave on a Sunday as well.... coz thats when we go out socialising and he has to look presentable....right?
The only thing he has been able to maintain is ...Yes.. his collection of books still outnumbers the numbers of clothes he has ... but well only just about.... thanks to his now living in the same city as most of his -in-laws... and he is perpetually being showered with gifts which are either books or clothes....

His love for books, Ray and The Big B....drives me sometimes..MAD.....sometimes makes him all the more lovable.....

Every shopping spree ....begins and ends in a bookstore... so earlier whenever he was with me.. i would never get any of my own shopping done... ( so now i do those without him and go and browse ( i love it too actually) at Teksons or Om bookstore every second and fourth Saturday...his days off...

Every Saturday night incase we were home and doing nothing but watching TV.... he very sweetly controls the remote and in the commercial breaks of something I want to watch he snatches bits and peices of... "shanivaar ki raat Amitabh ke saath".....His telling.. me .." Buri....5 mins... let me just let me hear Amitabh say this dialogue.....please.." and then repeating the dialogue with the Big B himself....with a look of adoration and marvel.....have me rolling my eyes...but smiling on the sly..

I think he must have gone and stood outside Lilavati hospital when Amitabh was sick.....actually I think he must have stood at his office window and prayed....( his office was by chance just behind the hospital).....

Once ...very soon after we were married... I was surprised to find him ringing the doorbell at 4 pm.... it seems he was sitting in Office and going through the Sholay dialogues in his mind( yes.. most people do just that at work .. i know...!!!!!) and couldn't remember one dialogue..so he came home to see his DVD and remember it...

He has this friend... who is an even bigger fan of The Big B...and so one night when he was over the both of them decided to watch "SHAAN"...which incidently i hadn't seen either.... well.. I still haven't seen it... cos .... before the film began .. i had to sit through their analysing the film and telling me how it was the most "Fundoo" film....and how the opening sequence which gives all the credits... as made like how the BOND films were shot..... etc....Whatever little I saw of the film did not have Amitabhs voice......or for that matter .. it was silent... these two.. were doing the dubbing....when they started telling me... what would happen next.... I decided to leave the room and them to some time alone with their idol... their god!

Satyajit Ray......well... The husband has taught me to watch,understand and appreciate cinema at its best.... I now can truly thank him for introducing me to Ray the way one should be......I watch his films from our collection whenever I get the time.... not only Rays films ..even his short stories of Feluda and other detective stories... most of which i had read earlier....were rediscovered by me ....and ... had me fascinated through out my pregnancy..

I remember him browsing in a bookstore and finding a coffee table book on Ray .... looking at it longingly...turning it over and looking very sadly at the price..... he put it down...and walked away.....his look when he unwrapped his birthday gift from me.... assured me that I had gotten him the right gift.....needless to say..he spent his entire birthday with the book...

He has these two huge coffee table books actually three... his most favourite... one on the Big B ...this one on Ray and one on Van Gogh.... which he dusts every saturday...browses through and returns them to their place in his bookshelf very lovingly with a look which could say..." untill next week my sweets..."..He refuses to let me keep them on my coffee table.. despite them being Coffee table books..

I am a very vocal person..... I say what I want to...to whom I want to and when I want to ..... the Husband isn't like that.... specially when it comes to expressing emotions....one such emotion is Love..... I don't think he has ever told his parents that he loves them.... I dont think he has ever told anyone he loves them..( except may be... me... that too after I threatened to leave him if he didn't say those three words..LOL) .

He however has different ways of showing his love.....and for me those are very very special...

My first birthday after we were married... apart from giving me some regular gifts ...like books , CDs etc..... he had a friend of his cut me a CD with a song specially sung for me...... the words.. bring tears to my eyes ......he got everything right....Love was just him walking by my side......( he won brownie points.... by the ways with all my friends .... who when they heard ..looked at their poor husbands who had..... despite buying them diamonds......fallen short..LOL).

He suddenly disappeared in a Barista leaving me sitting alone...fuming ...only to hand me a package when we were leaving.... he got me a coffee mug... which said..... "Whisper those three special words.....Here's Your Coffee..." giving me a look which only I could read....

He would rub cocoa butter on my belly and back during my pregnancy every night....

Even today....he rocks his son to sleep when he wakes up at night... just so that I can get some sleep....

Cleans his sons lil bottom with utmost care without complaining even once.....never mind what time of the night it is.....

He looks in on my ailing grandmother on his way to work..

Adores my mom and keeps buying her books..... he even despite his very busy schedule finds time to bring print outs of something or the other ... she needs.....( after both my brother and I have told her to go and climb gumtree....)..He patiently listens to my mother repeat her self...again and again...always asks if we should ask my mum to come along when we make plans to go out to dinner... knowing she would be alone at her place.....with my brother at work...

Sweetly he has changed from being a recluse to being a social person..... ( shocking his parents as well).....He never complains about the hoards of my relatives who keep dropping by..... or the number of dinner invites we keep receiving from family......my extended family..when I know he would much prefer to cuddle up with a book instead...

His telling his lil son.... who demands my attention all the time....Hey!! Buddy I was here first.....!

His look of despair and heartbreak when his little son yells when he picks him up and continues to bawl untill I quieten him down......breaks my heart and makes me leave my son and hug him with all my might.....reassuring him that his son doesn't realise what he is doing and yearns for him as much he does for me........

When I look into the future.....I can see him taking his son to see his first film.... reading him stories in Bengali.....teaching him the Sudoku.....helping him with his Math .....and weekend trips to the bookstore...... never saying no to a treat and eating out....

If all this is not Love ...then what is.....?????

The dreaded C word!!

2006-11-02T16:34:00.000-08:00

Yes ... the reason i haven't written in a while is ..the dreaded C word.. that haunts some young parents.....
The C word.... COLIC..
My mother was shocked and surprised to find me sitting one day when she was visiting with a wailing baby in my lap.... looking harrassed ..helpless and traumatised...
Why was Joy crying? I didn't know... I could'nt figure out what to do .....What would make hm stop..?..How could I ease his discomfort... ?What was causing this discomfort....?
If he wasn't yelling with tears rolling down his cheeks his eyes and face RED.... his fists clenched his lips trembling his little body all curled up......he was squirming and making weird noises.... I just didn't know what to do... He would look up at me with this desperate look in his eyes... as if telling me..." Ma .. please do something.....!!!!"

According to my mom... "breast-fed babies don't get colic.... or at least they didn't in our time..."..so there had to be something I wasn't doing right....making me feel guilty as hell for eating the samosa i had eaten the night before...
So The husband and I rushed the hospital.... the Doctor confirmed that YES..it looked like colic...and that... the breast feeding had nothing to do with it.. and nor had what i had eaten ..... It seems some kids just get the Colic and there was nothing to get worried about....
I could have hugged the doc...( by the ways he is quite a hotty... young and cool..very very with it...) I was relieved..... it wasn't me ..I wasn't guilty of causing my son all that pain...

It seems colic is very common amongst infants between 6 weeks and 3months ....irrespective of the fact that are breast-fed or not.... The Docs explanation was that the babies at that age are on their backs most of the time ...lying flat... not much exercise...except for feeding and doing potty .... and sleeping they don't do much... hence their digestion isn't the best... this causes gas in their tummies and hence the discomfort and pain ...
The solution..make sure that they are burped well....
Sometimes... the babies just don't burp.... and we as parents give up and lay them down... to sleep...as they usually fall asleep during their feed...
The Doctor said that we could also make him lie on his tummy though medically they don't advise it anymore... However.... in case of severe pain we could try it ... but one of us would have to be awake while joy slept in that positioning....
That was the second best piece of advice we got .. Joy was fine in that bunny rabbit position and slept like he should .... like a baby....so now we give him his tummy time whenever we can....

We give him a medicine ...which is a little zingy in taste... and he hates.. just before his colic starts twice a day.... we have to bear with a few minutes of yelling ... when he protests ..... then he calms down as his spasms stop....and starts purring.......

At least now both the Husband and I are being able to deal with our babies pain....I think most parents will agree.... to see your child cry in pain is the worst trauma ever.... specially when you are helpless....

Festival of Lights and "Joy"

2006-10-23T04:44:00.000-07:00

The past few days have just flown....what with festival season on in full swing ...It is all the more special for us as it is our lil bundle of Joys first Diwali....well actually its his "first" everything....so in other words everyday is a first for him and for us as well....

Diwali is a lovely festival... as in the lights bit... and the food and festivities bit... am not so "hot" about the crackers bit anymore...
As kids we would wait for Diwali time... it would mean shopping with Dad for 'baaji-potka'...initially both my brother and I would get on to Dad's scooter and leave home to come back grinning from ear to ear....balancing a big bag of crackers and our selves behind Dad...Over the years we progressed to making the trip in the car with lots of room for the crackers...but sadly came back with not that many...reason inflation in the market and a Dads wallet which was not....correspondingly bulky...

Nonetheless, we used to have a blast ....Ma would visit the Blind School Diwali Mela and come back loaded with Diyas and candles...which we would as a family decorate and light all over the house... My parents home is a beautiful, big and two and a half storeyed independent house.. so all lit up it would look quite breath taking......
The lighting of candles and diyas became a family ritual and tradition which I tried to follow even after I married and moved away... Every year both the Husband and I would buy Diyas and decorate our home... I remember our first Diwali together in Bangalore... our flat looked beautiful and we had a huge gang of friends over for dinner... I cooked mutton and pullao and kaali daal and there were lots of sweets... everyone came all dressed up ... after dinner we burst some crackers and then after midnight went over to The Park Hotels coffee shop for coffee and another round of dessert...lovely...

Diwali in Bangalore was also spent gambling.. actually learning to gamble on 5 rupee stakes and having heart failures when we lost sums as large as 20 bucks... lol.. those were the days...

Our second Diwali was spent in Hyderabad... we had just about moved and knew very few people... but called them over nonetheless. ..and decorated the flat and had a nice time...

Our third Diwali ..is this year and soooo special.... we are glad we have been able to share this special festival this year with our family and close friends....

This year too we lit up our apartment with Diyas which I picked up from the old Family haunt.. yes the Blind School Diwali Mela... and then went over to my cousins place as it was also Kali Puja...

Oh! I so love this festival season in India.. all over the country we celebrate these few months... and the best thing about it is that it brings everyone together... which is so special.

My Bundle of JOY!!

2006-10-15T04:45:00.000-07:00

I must say I am quite relieved.....To say the truth, I have never seen a baby ...as in a baby so small in my life..as in before my own..

For me....a baby is a picture of chubby cheeks, big round eyes ,rosy cheeks and a sloppy smile....so when The husband and I saw ours for the first time properly....we were disappointed....at least I was...
Where was my chubby baby?..where was the "baby" I had been dreaming of?...The place I delivered my baby had added to that dream by putting these big sized posters of very prosperous babies all over.....
The Husband and I felt a bit short-changed..with our little ET look alike ....

But..now Joy is a little over a month old and HAS HE CHANGED...
The past month has been a revelation for the Husband and I...everyday with our son has been a learning experience...We now instinctively know...when is the right time to change our baby's diaper...clean his poop....or wipe puke off his face .

All these days, I would complain how...none of his "newborn" clothes were the right size..as in they were all just too big for him..and there was no way I was going to let my son look like a "clown". Now suddenly I am having to bring out clothes which I had put away 'coz 'they wouldn't be needed for a while' .
My little bundle of Joy now changes his clothes thrice a day(not counting the ones soiled with pee and poop)..thanks to his over enthusiastic mom who wants him to wear all the smart clothes bought for him ... before it's too late.

The Husband and I have no hangups about hand-me-downs.... so the other day I visited a cousin of mine who has two lil boys aged 4 and 2....I came back home loaded with all the brands under the sun.... Joy now wears...Marks and Spencers onesies during the day and Carters Rompers to sleep.... He has a few sets of Ralph Lauren casuals and a few sets of Polo Sport tracks and also some very smart baby GAP shoes and the most precious of them all.... a pair of LEVIS ....
You don't get LEVIS in his size here.... and I am so excited and waiting for all three of us (Like Papa bear,Momma bear and Baby bear) all dressed in our Blue Levis ready to go out for the day.

Our son has already been out ... for lunch to Mainland China.. his parents favourite Chinese place....that place has a special place in our lives.....The Husband and I met there for the first time...( will write about how it all happened soon)..so it was quite apt that Joy's first lunch out would also be to MLC.....

Yesterday , being saturday...The Husband was home.... and so we went out shopping....( which I have come to the conclusion..The Husband HATES and Junior... I feel...finds BORING... much to my despair...) Actually, come to think of it...I thank God for that... so now I can shop in peace with out sulking tag- alongs....or the "we have an opinion"types.....will just leave them both home... and have a good time with The Husbands credit card....LOL....yippeee!!!

Anyways, coming back to yesterday,... we went to pick up some stuff for Joy.... a bathing chair .. which he loves by the way.... lounges in it as if he were relaxing in the French Riviera....and The maid, The Husband and I were his hand maidens..... massaging him, giving him a manicure or a pedicure....LOL....what a life....!!!

We were in this shopping place and The Husband and I smelt something familiar... our favourite coffee bar....so we looked at each other and said .. "Why not?"....so in we went..

Joy seemed to like the place... coz he fell asleep...in a few minutes and the smell of the coffee and all the noise didn't seem to bother him at all... All I can say is that Barista has gotten itself a new very very young client.. who will be visiting often .... as of now with his parents and soon.... with his own set....to hang out....play scrabble..strum the guitar....or just drink some Latte....

The Husband and I then went to visit some friends..who have a little 15 month old brat....he is the cutest kid I have ever seen and also the friendliest....The Husband and I had seen him about a month ago .. when Joy was born..... and were surprised to find that he wasn't the little baby we thought he was anymore.... He had grown.... into this Little-Big boy... the growth spurt was so visible.. that we were speechless... could one month do this to a kid.... common.. how long is a month anyways....

Both, The Husband and I looked down at Joy and realised that our"tadpole" wasn't looking like a tadpole anymore either....and he too was just a little over a month old...He was now looking like the baby we had been dreaming of...He had grown too....

On our way home ... we spoke about this...and felt silent...very soon our "little bundle of JOY" wouldn't be "little" anymore....

He missed it!!!!

2006-10-07T13:18:00.000-07:00

The Husband has always had a job which entailed a lot of travel.... those who have been following my blog....will know of my frequent posts during his tours throughout my pregnancy....in fact he was on tour for 24 days in August.....the month before I delivered.
A cousin visiting from the US brought along a little water proof baby album in which i was supposed to put pictures of the people I wanted the baby to recognise.... so I think the first picture will have to be that of the Husband....

Ok! ok!..I shouldn't crib too much.... The Husband, I must say is amazing with his son and was genuinely upset about missing his son's first month birthday.....actually is upset about missing anything .....He is a complete hands on father....the whole world seems to be asking me this very question ... whether The Husband is helping out ?...Does he help with the baby?...Does he stay up with you...?....Well..the answer is YES to all of the above and more... actually I sometimes think he is much better with this parenthood thingy than I am.... and I have no qualms in accepting that.....

Anyways....He has to work to bring the bread to our table and be able to afford all the stuff we need for our little baby... and being enthusiastic parents we want the very best and well the very best costs...so he,poor chap has to work....coz..I am not...for a year at least....

As I was saying...Yesterday , the 6th of October ....our baby completed one month of being with us.....and yes his dad....missed his little birthday party.... however must give him his due.. he left only in the morning.. so technically was there to wish his son .....
It was quite sad to see Daddy leave his wife and son on such an important day.....Anyways we saved him two big slices of Birthday cake....chocolate cream his favourite( dads not sons...) and because it was a kiddie cake...we decorated it with bright coloured gems instead of the usual walnuts..... check this pic out...!

Cutting cake with some friends at home....

Our son spent the entire day with his Mom.... thats me.. and was very well behaved.. It actually seemed as though the lil one understood that he had just crossed a milestone and should hence act mature and his age... all of one month!!!

His Dads parents from Kolkata sent him an E- greeting... his very first... so I thought it should appear on this post as well.... and get recorded....

"On your completing one month

Our loving Babusona

You were born on a day which all said was 'Anand Chaturdashi"

You complete a month on a day which is the day of 'Goddess of Prosperity"

May health, happiness & 'god touch' be there in all you do.

This is all your Dadabhai & Nammi wish for you."

Happy Birthday.... darling son...!!

I started writing on day 18 and ended on day 30

2006-09-26T00:47:00.000-07:00

Today is the 26th of September..and my baby is 3 weeks old... gosh!! Time really flies...It seems like just yesterday that I went into deliver my lil bundle of Joy!!!!
He has grown in these past few weeks... his vocal chords have definitely become stronger.

Both the husband and I have realised that our lives have changed for ever and that... this change like the theory of change is a continuing process....

Our son, ......( please note the pause....I don't know where to start with the update) is now almost 3.5 kgs/a little over 7 pounds in weight...which some may say is still a little small....considering his Dad was a bonny 8 pounder at birth...( I have sympathy for my Mother-in-law...a lil 2.5 kg baby was bad enough to give birth to).

Joy is now beginning to look a little more human...ie. from our earlier descriptions of him resembling a tadpole and other such creatures... His cheeks are filling out and as I mentioned earlier so are his lungs....

At 5 days he was trying to turn over.. which shocked most of us .. coz it seems kids start attempting that only at around 4-5 months....and at 8 days was tryng to stand up( with our support naturally...he isnt superman yet!)....as in his legs seem to have gotten all the strength they need....

So when I visited the Doc for his Day 14 check up....I asked him a number of questions about the normalcy of such things... to which he told me a story of another doctor friend of his whose kid was turning over at 10 days as well.. so being a doctor.. she got a little concerned and rushed her baby to a neurologist for a detailed check up... the neurologist laughed and told her to chill..and said that kids of today have broken all milestones.. which is why nowadays no one talks of milestones and only talks of precedents....which keep getting updated..

So in other words I was told to chill...

Our baby, has mastered the art of driving us a lil bonkers everyday in some way or the other... his Granddad calls everyday to ask for his daily report... which fluctuates from a B+ to a D.....we are just not able to give him an F as yet... If one day deserves a B+ then that very night gets him a D....so poor guy hasnt been doing too well as per his report card.

The Husband and I give him his bath everyday.. which is a different story all together....on some days he behaves like an angel and on some days he is a holly terror... which is fine coz his dad has been calling Osama on and off.. Joy seems to like his massage ....if he is in a good mood... he behaves like a Raja... he likes the massage as long as it is restricted to his arms and legs and back... the minute his mommy attempts to venture near his face or head.. he turns RED and bawls his lungs out...... the same goes for his bath.. when he is made to rest against the side of the tub and his Dad gently splashes warm water against his behind or on his tummy he purrs.....and sits with his arms resting on the top of the tub..as if he was lazing in a Jacuzzi.... but the minute I bring the wash cloth near his face and/or head.... we need ear plugs.

Off late , he has started to understand the power of his lungs and the minute we put him down after carrying him.... he turns RED and yells... so much so... when our maid who while carrying him attempts to sit down....so that she can rest a bit....he yells even then.

The other thing he has mastered is the art of peeing and pooping the second after we clean him...and put him into a fresh diaper. A few days ago , he pooped on his dad..the second after his dad had painstakingly cleaned him and then pee'ed on me ..all in the span of 5 seconds... and that too in the middle of the night.

Joy being a boy and having his precious family jewels......working overtime..what with all the peeing..... surprises me everyday.. I am regularly sprayed on my face.... despite sitting opposite his danger zone... we sometimes find a wet patch on the wall...on a dry day.... then the other day I almost slipped as I was entering his room... there was a puddle near the door... and when I checked Joy he was absolutely dry and so was his bed....the maid and I just looked at each other and when I told the Husband about his sons exploits of the day.. both of us laughed and then looked down at our lil bundle of Joy and sighed ....thinking.... this was just the beginning...we had lots more still to come.....

P.s.: Thanks to my pee and poop cleaning routine.. i finished this blog only on day 30....so the next one should be on his one month birthday.... hopefully it shall be posted before his 6th month birthday.

Love.....

2006-09-19T03:49:00.000-07:00

Through out my life I have had to hear as must have everyone else...I am sure....."become a mother and then you will know....".

And I would wonder... Good lord! .... The list of things I will get to know once I become a mother .. is growing longer and longer...

My mother loved... emotionally blackmailing me....by saying..."Jokhon tumi ma hobe..... tokhon tumi bujhte paarbe...( when you will become a mom yourself ..then you will begin to realise ../understand) " with tears in her eyes.... sometimes even in fits of anger .

I am a mother today.... and yes I have started realising a lot of things..... that I didnt realise earlier. One such thing... is an emotion......that of- LOVE.....unconditional love!

I have had to get a million medical tests done all my life.... so the sight and prick of the needle is something I am immune to...My mother could never go with me for my tests.... she would drive me there and then sit in the car or in the waiting room... I would find her quite silly and would tell her this everytime ....and you guessed right .. I had to hear the famous line.... " when you become......" everytime.

Just recently when I was in labour giving birth to my child...my mum was with me initially and then... refused to enter the labour room and cried buckets and kept praying for me outside.... I over heard her tell some one .. that it was the most painful experience of her life... much more painful than the two deliveries she has had.....

She said something that I will never forget.. she said..." when someone is in pain and cries out asking for help from someone..... it is usually for his/her mother... the cries can be in any language....in Bengali.,Hindi, English, Tamil, etc ...like when I cried out...I kept calling for my mother.."

Last week... I took my lil son for his first check up to the hospital... and the doc there needed to burst a lil puss boil on his chest. He assured me that it would be painless for the baby.... but I just couldn't look......It is true the needle didn't hurt my baby... but he sensed something and yelled.... and his cries.... though not audible as yet.... sounded like ....."Maaaaaaaaa"...I did feel my heart break.....and did feel tears rolling down my cheeks immediately....

The feeling a mother and as a matter of fact even a father gets when their child immediately stops crying when they are picked up by their parents.... all you have to do is hold them to your chest and whisper into its ear and they start purring instead of crying....is simply amazing

Our baby keeps us awake all night sometimes....and we are ready to climb the wall.... but the next morning... one toothless smile...is all it takes for us to forget the previous traumatic night....

The first time my baby put its lil fingers around my lil finger......don't think I will ever forget that moment.

My baby was born after 22 hours of labour... and so once everything was fine the doc decided to keep the baby in the nursery for monitorring for 24 hours.. and also said that I should be given the much needed rest I deserved. At that moment I was relieved for the rest.... but I also woke up The Husband at 4 am and demanded to be taken to the nursery to see my child.

When I heard that the Husband had held our child before I had.... I was so jealous.... and since .... the baby was kept under observation .. I couldnt hold it for more than 24 hours..... I almost went into depression. Thank god .... he was given to me before I broke down.

My baby is now 13 days old .. and I have already learnt/understood a lot of new things.... which I wouldn't have understood earlier......

Motherhood....does make you see things differently.

Day 5

2006-09-11T06:07:00.000-07:00

Hmnnn...Yaaawn..!!!!..What.....Hmmn....Yawn....Hmmn!!!

Thats the kind of response you will be getting from me very soon.... am still enjoying waking at all hours and changing diapers and feeding on demand and rocking my baby to sleep ....I have doubts about this continuing though.
Today was Day 5 of having someone new in my life....something totally new and something I still can't believe exists .

Ok! OK! I have to stop calling my baby an "IT"....my Mom has started making a list of the names of animals and other creatures the husband and I have called our baby.....whenever we add a new one ..she repeats all of them like that game we used to play...don't know what its called.. "Concentration.." or something.... Where...you sit in a circle and choose a topic and then every one names a person connected to that topic and you have to keep repeating them when your chance comes and in the proper order... what is it called...????? ok .. forget it... am sure you know what I am taking about .... it's also shown in that Ray Film.."Abar Aranye"....or maybe the sequel... am not sure...

So my mom goes..." Bang( bong for frog)....Tadpole.....ET.....Lizard....Crow...."and her expression is to be seen to be believed.... She can't imagine how both the Husband and I can come up with such stuff... for the lil new man in her life.... her first Grandson....She keeps dropping in ... and peeping into the lil ones room... and goes... " CHOOOO Chweet.... lil DJ.".... by the ways... I do not like the nick name... I like the one I chose... but I don't think anyone's bothered.

We had some family over last night for my brother's birthday... and everyone was discussing what "daaknaam" my son should have ... My youngest cousin sister.. came and announced that he should have a horrible one like the one she was given... and still curses all of us for it .... My cousin brothers....came up with some other unmentionables....My mom... said she was going to call.... him DJ... and was supported by my Father-in-law.. who said.. that DJ was apt.. 'coz Dyujoy was born between Blocks D ( where we live) and J ( where my mum lives). The Hospital incidentally is also half way between the two blocks geographically.
Anyways, Dyujoy is officially nicknamed "Joy"....and that is what he shall be called... at least in front of me...

I am a Mommy!!

2006-09-08T01:47:00.000-07:00

Well!...It's finally over.... I am now officially a Mommy!!!

I cannot believe it....actually nor can the Husband...If one sees this pic .. one will say .. oh! they had a baby girl.... well.. not really.. we actually have had a baby boy...the pink wrap... was given to the nursery when we hadn't a clue... anyways...we have no such sexist notions....

Ok.. here is all the basic gen.... We had a baby boy who has now been named Dyujoy Chaudhuri.."Dyujoy"means "the conqueror of heavens".I just had to let everyone know... especially after blogging about the various name options and the Husbands OCD about names...

Dyujoy or "Joy" was born on the 6th of September,2006 at 8.14pm..or as his maternal grandfather would have told everyone... "Junior arrived at 2014hrs." He weighed 2.5 kgs at birth.He was delivered normally and I the poor mommy had to go through almost 20 hrs of labour... for it to happen. I will write a whole new blog on my labour....so please await that upate.

As of now all three.. the baby, exhausted mother and the much harrassed father..are all doing fine.

P.s This posting is being done while I am still in Hospital....I found out that the proud Daddy had already posted a blog about the baby where he starts off with the Mommy and Osama sharing a birthdate....so...If Daddy can blog why can't this Mommy...right?

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder-2

2006-08-30T04:42:00.000-07:00

The other OCD the Husband has , is his obsession with names beginning with "D" for our to-be child.
After we were married and some of our friends were expecting children.. a common party conversation would be "what should we name the kid?" Every set of to-be parents wanted suggestions.. and these parties would resemble that famous Standard Chartered Manhattan "Dinkoo" ad...hilarious and lots of fun...

But for us the naming game wouldn't end at the party . The Husband had bought Maneka Gandhis "Book of Hindu Names " and would spend hours browsing through it. So after each such party we would sit down and look for "nice" names... the ones in the book are horrible by the ways.

However, this' looking for names' exercise would invariably end up with the both of us fighting over names for our future kid . According to the Husband... everyone in his family had names starting with the alphabet D and so his children would also follow the family tradition and be named with D. Initially I didn't say anything and so we started looking for "nice and modern " names with D. The great book had some awful suggestions..... like for boys.. Duryodhan and Dritarashtra and Drona and for girls...Draupadi, and Daman and stuff... I was horrified..

The husband then says ... not only should the name be with D but also be pleasing to the Bong ear and also be easy to pronounce by the Bongs ..so none of my modern names would do.

So we would end up fighting....and end result ...me in tears and him facing away from me and fast asleep. All this mind you when we were no where near any plans of starting a family.

Then we suddenly found ourselves in a position to actually seriously look for a "nice" name for our -to be child. So we too had a party for cousins and friends....to help us by giving us name suggestions..... it was a disaster... We still had that D stipulation.. but had come to an understanding or so I thought.

We would stick with the D business for him but I would get to choose the name and since Bongs always have pet names or what we call Daaknaams....we would choose that together.

So suggestions came pouring in from all quarters... From the senior citizens quarter ... we got names like Deependu...Diptesh....Deepankar....etc.. all very very Bong names... and very sad as far as I was concerned...from my cousins... who are mostly from Delhi...we got suggestions like Devinder and Deepinder..and Damanjit....(they thoroughly enjoyed our pained expressions..i am sure)..from some others we got Damodar and Dushyant..... even a Deen Dayal and Deena Nath....yes... horrifying...I know. My Mom came up with Tridip...completely ignoring the D business saying it was a bit of both our names.. cute ma...but sorry!!! There was also a suggestion of Don Chaudhuri and Daroon Chaudhuri....which thankfully both of us laughed over but VETOED!

I suggested Dhruv...but was promptly told in Bongland he would be called... Dhroobo.... which was awful....

By the ways, most of the suggestions were for boys names.. as thankfully both the Husband and I had reached a consensus on a shortlist of three girls names.

Even for girls names ,in fact, I like Dia..which would be written as Diya but was promptly told .. that she would be tormented her entire college life with "Eh Dia! Kisko Dia? Kya Dia?".Actually come to think of it now.. which ever name I suggested was vetoed for some reason or the other.

The Husband.. was fixated on Dhritiman...for some reason.... and I hated it ..for it remined me of Shaktiman and Hanuman. The saving grace came from my sweet new Brother-in-law. ( The husbands Sisters new Mallu husband)... When he heard of the Dhritimaan option... he promptly SMSd me back saying " Drit? what? Man?"...lol . Thankfully that settled it... If the poor kids own Uncle couldn't pronouce his name what was the point. Thanks Nitin for that.

In the middle I got fed up with the D business and announced that I would name my kid with S as the two men in my life and family before marriage ( Dad and bro) have names with S. So i suggested Shantanu... there was also a hunk in college by that name who was also a brain and an INLAKs scholar to Cambridge. But was told by the Husband... that the poor chap would be teased with Shanta"nonu".... it seems... and to top it all and much to the Husbands cheap thrills it was substantiated by a friend.... who when he heard the Shantanu suggestion.... also came up with Shanta"nonu".....Ufff!!!!

The husband was also dying to find a "cute " daaknaam for his kid... He by the ways loved "Dinkoo"(yuck!)...then told me one morning that we would call our first kid... Tumtum and the second Pikpik....( he was given silent treatment for the entire weekend)....then came up with a list of pathetic ones like Potla and Choochoo and Puchka ( will leave my reactions for you to guess)

Anyways , we finally managed to shortlist a name for a boy and a girl. Something Bong but not really typically Bong...something everyone would be able to say with ease. I even have the Daaknaams settled.. as in I chose them and the husband has had no say.... you see am pregnant and have tears on a leaky tap....

We shall let you know the name of the child when it does finally arrive... as I have said in my previous blogs... am still waiting !!!!

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder-1

2006-08-30T04:13:00.000-07:00

What does one do with a husband who has a severe case of OCD ..?

In my case... The Husband has a number of OCDs.

The latest one being .... "formatting blogs ".

I go to my address pop up list and click on my the saved blogging address and suddenly get redirected to Sykpe... i don't know how..!!!!!
Zapped....
I then try going on to the main blogging homepage and type in my username and hope for the best... and get directed to a page with a new blogname....and a whole new look.
My old blog was dark blue and snazzy.....or so i thought.... but naturally the Husband.. thought otherwise.
The new page...is brown...and sophisticated... but not "snazzy" if you get my drift....and has a grainy texture and feel...
Its nice... actually not bad really , but still something my Mum would have chosen... for her Blog.....
Then he has "formatted" the whole thing....checked for spelling mistakes and grammatical errors... and all this has been done according to him while he was on tour...When i spoke with him... and heard about it ...he got a earful... about being on tour and working for his company and not formatting my blog... which can be done here in Delhi ....while he is with me...and with my inputs.
anyways....