I say it aloud... and am rebuked by my mother who says I shouldn't say anything too good about him.. as "Nozor lege jaabe...." and proceeds to spit over his head or if by chance he has a bout of sneezees... or coughing.... she makes the maid burn some Lonkas ( Chillis) on the tava over the flame... to "cataoe the nozor"( change the evil eye)......
All this makes me look with amazement and shock at my mother ...who isn't from the boon docks.... as one in today's world would think she is from when they read this....but a very highly educated woman... an individual of repute in her own right... a University Professor...a writer.........when I confronted her with all these weird beliefs and practises... she had just one answer..... "I am Joy's grandmother...his D'shona.... . I will do whatever I can to protect him from evil....so what if you find them weird.." Well !! what does one say to that....?
This is something I have always wondered.... How can a mother's or for that matter even any parent's "nozor" be harmful to their child....? After all if we don't look out for our child then who will...If we don't admire our creation.....then no one has the right to do so either.....Why is it that when someone gets married in Bengali tradition .. the mother of neither the groom nor the bride attend the basic religious ceremony.....? Would any parent want to miss such a momentous occasion in the lives of their children...? Your child is going to be starting a new phase in his/her life....don't you want to be there to encourage and cheer them on... if not to bless them...?
Now I will not say that I only admire my son or only talk about him being amazingly amazing.....and beautiful..... I also am the first to criticise him... When he spits in my face.... when he refuses to eat.. when he yells for no reason...when he does what he is shown not to do.... I am the first one to tell him he isn't doing the right thing.... he isn't being a good boy ..or whatever....Surprisingly .. even then... I am told that I shouldn't tell him off... as that too is "nozor"..VERY STRANGE!!!
So basically, a parent isn't supposed to say anything ...good or bad about her/his child....However I think ..actually am sure this rule holds good for only the initial years , because I am positive that when the child grows up.. and misbehaves... the parents will be blamed for his/her indiscipline and rude behaviour....
Anyways.... I am a proud parent and want to show off... here are some Photographs of Joy.... see them and agree with me....
Joy in December..Yes!!! he had declared summer
And more "dushtumi"
Playing in his Play Gym.
P.S......I do put a Nozor teep on his forehead... Just in case... you never know.. Na?