The Weekend..

We have had quite a hectic weekend....
What with wedding season on... and the entire world deciding to get married on those very same days.... one tends to be rushing from one wedding to another....

In the past few weeks , we have attended three big weddings.. all of which were very nice... we took Joy to two receptions and have learnt our lesson....
He stays at home... from now on....
He though had a blast... can't say the same for his Baba.... who was running behind him ....preventing him from lunging at the lovely.. warm sigris.... stopping him from diving into the freezing waterfalls... and what not....
Though we have learnt one thing.... just carry his nosey wipes and a bottle of water and warm milk... and we are ready to go.... and of course a few diapers....
he eats everything and anything now....
Joy seems to have a particular liking for Chiken Malai Tikka.... he can eat inumerable quantity of those... as well as fried fish... so I guess we are ready for any trip anywhere....

On Sunday... we took Joy for a small picnic.... we do so otherwise as well... and did a lot of it last year.....if people remember reading my blog then....
so this time as well we went to our favourite Lodi Garden.... and were surprised to be joined by a few friends... and their babies as well....
There was this lovely plan of going to Kuchchesar...the Mud Fort.... which is about two hours away.... but I had the feeling the husband would not be very enthusiastic... about the long drive considering he drives for almost two hours everyday to work and back..... and sure enough...he refused.... So I told our other friends to go ahead.....
The husband and I have this plan of visiting all the Neemrana properties....( i think every one has somekind of quirky dream... and the husband and I share one.... as well... we love the high life.. we love.... plush resorts and hotels... and love fine dining ..which is why we seem to be broke as well...) We have already done one fo the Neemrana properties.... we did Pataudi last year and are doing Neemrana Fort on the 3-4 th of Jan... and are very excited about it...So we have been eyeing Kesroli and Kuchchesar as well... as they are close by... ( kuchchesar now ceases to be a Neemrana .... don't know why though).....anyways .. So the Husband has assured me that we shall go there soon as well.... there are such good deals on... sometimes....

We went as I was saying for our picnic.. with some tossed up macaroni and oranges and some juice... two other couples .. also joined us... making the picnic quite exciting with garam kachoris and sandwiches and soem hot spicy chai from a local guy there...
The kids had a blast.... they climbed up little hillocks... rolled down the sides.... played with a ball... chomped on the yummy food.... lay in the grass and napped.. drank their milk.. all while... us adults.. soaked in the sun and caught up on senseless and inane conversation....
There was laughter all around...
It was great watching Joy play with his two friends... Leela and Vidipta... Leela.. who is a little older.. had this protective attitude.. when Joy tripped and fell down ..she tried to clean his hands with a wet wipe... so cute... and also walked after him... to keep an eye on him....( she is just a year older than Joy...) and Joy and Vidipta... went through this round of huggies...and swaying to us humming to them.... Joy ran around like a maniac.... exhausting his poor Baba....

We finally returned back to my mothers place at around 4 in the evening and then after a cup of tea.. drove back to Gurgaon.... The Husband and I have now started enjoying our drive back hom together..we chat... joke... and try and save the car stereo.... from being smashed ..when Joy is awake... or sing along if he isn't... lol..
We reached home torealise we hadn't picked up our months provisions... so we dropped Joy and the maid off.. and went to get that over with....
A friend of The husband's... came over at night and we all went out to dinner to this really cozy Thai diner... close by ..the food was fabulous....came back with a doggy bag......:- )

The Husband is off on tour... and will be gone for a week.. am completely swamped with work at school... so I really don't think I will notice the time flying.... Joy keeps me on my toes when I come home every afternoon.... but I am loving it....

Joy's first birthday....

I will begin by refusing to apologize and refusing to promise to be more regular....why? coz I stink at both....
So here is a post that I had drafted in September and never got round to publishing it...
This is a pictoral post on Joy's first birthday.... Yes!!!!! I know it's almost December.... but well...

Joy in his lil diaper and Genji.... sitting next to ornaments and clothes bought for Bal Gopal by his D'shona... these were to be offered to the God on the 6th of September,Joy's first birthday...

The Bal Gopal wearing everything on Joy's birthday.

Joy trying to open the Mandir's gate..looks like he wanted to have a lil chat with the Bal Gopal.

Joy was quite convinced that he had the right to ride on Nandi's back.. it took sometime for everyone to get him off..

6th September - Joy's 1st birthday!!!!

We had a small family do at home and his closest friends the Brat and lil Bean came to visit him with MadMomma and the OA. Joy was also lucky to have his Dadu bhai, Nammi and Shona Ma here from Kolkata and his D'shona, Mamu and Boro Didu here as well... he was thrilled to bits when he saw his favourite Bharat Mamu as well..

Joy cutting his cake with his Baba and Ma..

Eating his first piece of cake...

.

Lil Beanie...

Joy and the Brat....huggies...

The day of the BIG BASH

8th September 2007.

Venue: Pizza Hut.

We arrived early ..so Joy had a field day sprawling himself on the air balls....

This is what the place looked like when we entered the venue

This is what it looked like when the Khoi Bag was burst....

Random pictures from the party....

The food...

Joy fell asleep in the middle of his party.... poor chap was exhausted...

And.. This is my favourite picture from the party.... The Three of Us....

I apologise......

I apologise for disappearing from the face if this earth...... but am back... and plan to be here ..I hope more regularly....

Happy Birthday Joy baby!!!

My baby has turned one.... I haven't had access to the internet for a week now...and no time to do anything but organise my life for the shift...
Now we have shifted and are settled in.... My In-laws came in to celebrate Joy's first birthday with us and got us an extra gift the Husband's grandmother as well... Joy's great grand mother...My favourite person in the husband's family.....
Joy could not have asked for a better and more precious present.....and nor could I...I wish she could have visited us earlier and am also missing Dadubhai....wish he was here too....

Joy's birthday was on the 6th of September. He is now officially 1 year and two days old... I don't know what to write about my baby.... only this... I love you darling.....and am so glad that we had you.... its been the best decision of our lives and am glad our wish came true.....

Your Ma will write a better post once all the celebrations are over and she gets some more time to sit and pen her thoughts and feelings....but untill then.....I leave you with two beautiful posts written ...... one by your Baba and one by your Mashi...

Also two posts done by his parents when he was born....mine and his Baba's

Happy Birthday.... my sweetheart..

Thank you !!! but no thanks!!

Potty training.....

I am being congratulated by everyone .... about the feat I have accomplished.....well.... both the Husband and I are a little embarrassed.... receiving all the praise.... coz.....we didn't do anything.... WE DID NOT POTTY TRAIN our son.....we never wanted to.....we don't believe in it....

But...stillll......It happened... just like that...

I have written about it in just the previous post to this one....so will not repeat the story again...

The husband and I have been going crazy with all the advice people have been giving us ... about how it was the most essential thing for us to do......"Train him.".. "Potty train him" "..... not potty trained yet..... tsk tsk...."

There was a time when I would be told all this.... being the mother it is naturally understood that all these tasks are mine to undertake..... so whenever I was cornered into listenning to a lecture... I would see the husband looking over their shoulders.... motioning me to count to ten and back.....

What I could never understand was .." what it was to them.. if my son was potty trained or not...?"

The poor guy is not even one year old... give him a break....puhleese.....!!!!

And while you are at it give us one too....we deserve it....

Here are some pics of Joy doing potty.....( I know he will hate me for this one later.... but.. what the hell!!)

Joy on the pot

Joy and his mommy.....potty time is bonding time...

Countdown

A week to go before we move to Gurgaon..... and as I have always mentioned... My life can never be simple..... even if it seems simple..... something or the other happens to make things difficult.

Well , now that I am working I have certain professional responsibilities as well... I teach ..hence I am responsible towards my students and the organisation.....

So..anyways... The school follows a policy of having "form evenings"( all the sections within a class make up a form)....and the school believes that it is better to have form evenings ..so then all the children get a chance to participate properly...and not just end up becoming trees or clouds etc...and I was so happy to see each and every child so involved in their "item" for the evening and practising hard.....
SO basically to come back to how my life is all tooooo complicated .. this form evening is on the 31st and will carry on till around 8 pm.... after which I can't leave till all the kids in my class are picked up by their parents or gaurdians.... so there is no way I can get home till around 10 pm.....
The next morning at 8 am the packers arrive.... so no chances of me getting a break.....
Anyways am just waiting to get this whole shifting business over and done with.... the drive back and forth from Gurgaon is now something I have gotten used to.... I have another sweet colleague who does a car pool with me....so we caht all the way going and coming..... but both of us are still just waiting to move....( she moves next month as well).....
We have suddenly found a lot of our friends moving into Gurgaon..... can't complain... won't complain....actually I will just Whoooooop!!!! in joy!!!! What fun...

5 teeth... peek -a -boo ...tooki... and potty tra......

It's been ages.... I know... but what to do... I am guilty.... and I have no one to blame but myself.

I have been in the middle of a very hectic month at work.... plus a lot of activity at home.. what with relatives visiting...organising and coordinating with the packers and movers.. etc.... changing addresses all over..... subscriptions, bank accounts, gas conections, broadband and worldspace and whatnot.... am going around like a person who is on the verge of a breakdown..... so today I decided to come home early... got a lift with a colleague...came home to find Joy fast asleep....so suddenly realised I had a few minutes to myself.....

I am sitting and typing this hoping I will be able to write a few lines before Joy wakes up and demands his Mommy time....

Joy will be a year in a few days....we shift to Gurgaon on the 1st.... my inlaws come in to visit from the 3rd and celebrate Joy's birthday with us....am glad they are being able to do so....

They are also bringing with them my most favourite person in their family... the husband's grand mother..... she is a darling.... am looking forward to her being here with us...

Am also glad that the husband's parents will be here for a week after we shift so they can help us settle in comfortably and also be at home with Joy for the first week in the new house.... I have to work two days that week....so am feeling good.

Joy has got 5 teeth....three on top and two on the lower gum.... he is still chewing and gnawing everything within reach .. my index finger has started looking like a shrivelled "bhindi"...

I have taken a photograph of him finally showing one tooth....will upload as soon as the husband manages to do so....

He is also babbling a lot now.. Joy rewarded his Pishi over the phone with a series of babbling sounds... and both of them had quite a conversation....

Joy has also started eating proper food.. yesterday he ate paneer and chawal .....and is also munching on roti with butter and cheeni and toast with the same as well... I think he likes the crunchy texture of the sugar against his gums..

We take Joy to the park every evening... and his latest is to want to climb up the slide......instead of sliding down....he also loves the monkey bars... and hangs as if he was born to do just that....even attempts pull ups.... trying to get the bar between his teeth and it honestly takes all my strength to keep him from being successful.

Joy's latest game with his Ma is tooki.... yes ...the same old game .. it's been his favourite since day one.... but now since he is crawling all over... he and his ma play this game all over the house.... however ... its like when a kid plays cricket and only wants to bat..... well.. in his game of Tooki..... Joy only wants to go seek.... Ma has to go and hide.... its been great fun... every day after work.. Joy and I play this game for almost an hour.... both of us are pooped by the end of it.... I am ready to drop... and can eat an elephant after the session.. and Joy drops off to sleep after all the exercise and his dinner and bath..... So I get to eat in peace and he sleeps ......peacefully....not bad na....???/( except for all the extra Kgs I am putting on thanks to the extra food)

Ok.. the last bit on his update is the most important and I have left it for the last....

Joy now sits on the "big potty".... as in the potty seat on the big potty and does his potty every morning. Yes I know.... YIPPPPPPEEEEEEE!!!!

My mom has been driving me mad the last few months about potty training him and I have written as well about it ..and how I refused to potty train anyone...he will learn it as and when he needs to....

On 15th August... yes I chose the date.... lol... no really it just happened ....coincidence... we were home and in the morning...Joy was making faces as if he was about to do his potty.... so I jumped up and got the potty seat out from the the drawer under the bed.. it was still in its plastic wrap..... ( all this time Joy was still attempting the potty business)and ran and put it on the potty and then ran to grab Joy before he does the job and got him undressed.. and everything... but I guess all the excitement must have stopped the motion for the lil fella... lol.... so.. that was that... the husband rolled around in laughter watching my craziness...

However , that very afternoon.... Joy was sleeping next to me... when I noticed him squirming in his sleep.. making faces.. like he does before his potty.... so I again picked him up and made him sit on his potty seat... he can sit now.. so was quite ok sitting and holding on to the handles... plus I think he just was feeling too potty to know what was happenning..... so it happened.... I was thrilled....even cleaning him was pretty easy with the potty shower... he loves the tickling feeling against his lil bummy...

The next day...I felt him squirm early in the morning at around 5 .30 am again.. now that is the time he usually wakes up ...so I made him sit on the pot again..... and success.... its been 5 days now and it has become a routine.... so no training was required.... it just happened....

and am glad...!!!

OK..... I hope to be able to write a little more often once we move to Gurgaon..... since I wont have any commuting to do... so will be a little more relaxed.... I shall also try and upload a number of photographs....

untill then......

Joy's 11th month birthday!!!

Ok!! so I have been a horrible mom.... Joy's 11th month birthday came and went and the husband and I just about managed to hug and kiss him before running off to work....

I came home to find.. a lil package dropped off by his beloved D'shona.... a set of 5 sleeveless vests in various colours.... and a Fisher Price toy..... and His Mamu had bought him a huge drum..... I smiled when I saw all this.... ok!! so we didn't get him anything.... but others remembered.....

Joy has been happily dragging his drum all over the house.... and making the most amazing racket... so much so that over the weekend I had to confiscate the drum sticks... not so much because of the noise... but the fear of him hitting himself....
Anyways.... he has suddenly takena liking for sitting on his drum.. as in using it as a stool... lol.. looks quite cool and cute as well...( I would have taken some pics and uploaded them... but we are having serious Connectivity problems... even the husbands Lap top is playing up..so .. I shall post them as soon as I can.
I finally managed to open my net today and have found an email from Joys Nammi... with her monthly birthday poem....
here it is ......

Little Joy our life’s big exlixir

You’ve given us 11 months of happiness & laughter

Waiting impatiently to see you lite & blow your first candle

With it Nammi & Dadu would make endless wishes for their little bundle

- Be a man strong like Mother Earth and big hearted like the Sky

- May the Fire within help to ignite & inspire you always to a new high

- Let the beautiful Wind blow favourably & help you keep smiling

- Like the Water (and your Father!) remain cool, severe and forever progressing!

Anyways...
am now going nuts organising Joy's first birthday party.... we want to do it ona smaller scale.... as it is we have had two huge parties for everyone in both Delhi and Kolkata.... and everyone has wished us and loaded us with gifts and useful stuff.. for Joy.... its embarrassing to accept gifts again in such quick succession.... so we are only calling close family... and friends and cousins with kids..
we have 39 adults and 11 kids.... I know its not a small number.... but compared to our usualy dos it is .....
Went and booked the venue yesterday..... so at least that is done...
Anyways.... my darling baby.. happy 11th month birthday.... belated though it is...
the next one will be for your first year... and after this I shall only refer to your age in terms of years ....my gosh is time flying....

First tooth...finally

I have been going on and on and on about how Joy hasn't yet got his first tooth...well.... a few days back.. I suddenly felt something very very sharp cut my finger which was being chewed on by Joy....

I pulled out my finger and saw some little marks on it amidst all the drool...

I was thrilled... I immediately pried Joys mouth open.... yes I had to pry it open.. he just wouldn't let me check... which is really hilarious coz.. otherwise... his mouth is always open....all his pictures have his mouth open .



When I finally managed to peer into his mouth I saw two little white thingys in there.... one was out and very very sharp and the other was also almost there....



Yippppeee.e... my baby had finally gotten his teeth....!!!



I felt a little sad as well thinking he wouldn't give me his famous toothless smile any more....but ..well... am glad the teeth are out.. poor chaap has been struggling with them.....



I am also sorry about no picture proof... coz he is just refusing to keep his mouth open long enough for me to click a pic...

Will do so as soon as I can and upload..

Curls

The other day I was chatting with Joys pishi.... when I mentioned that Joy had inherited my curls.. much to my despair.....I hate..ok hate that much but don't like my curls that much......the only time I am very happy to have them is when I hear people have spent millions getting perms or curls done to their hair.....I have been born with natural curls.... at any point of the day or night .... the lower part of my hair hangs in ringlets.... yes.. the kind you get after putting curling irons in your hair..... I have been told I am blessed.....

But...

I guess the grass is always greener on the otherside....I on the other hand pay millions to get my hair straightened.... I have done it all... straightening irons, blow drys, combing my hair for hours.. even hang things from the ends to have them stretch out.....everything.....even had them chemically straightened....

My brother too has been blessed with curly hair.... and he has a weekly appointment with the barber to trim it so that it doesn't start curling upwards..... he hates it too.....

So the minute both of us noticed that Joy has inherited the curls... we looked at each other and sighed.... here goes a few more millions....

But I must say Joy looks adorable with his locks... they are soooo cute.... he has his trade mark two curls which are like lil horns on two sides of his head... and now at the back he has two rows of curls.... he doesn't have a very thick growth..but yes.... they curl alright....

check them out....

Joy's curls....don't miss the shadow against the wood

A close up...

Update

I have been warned by members of my family that if I don't update my Joy Updates regularly.....they will kill me.....so... this post is for THEM!!!

Joy is a big boy now.... he will be a year in a lil over a months time,....(which reminds me I need to organise his birthday party)

Joy has become very "dushtu...."...there is no other word for it....He is just very very "dushtu"...

He is standing up holding on to every and anything......even his Baba's hair ( on the leg)..which is very very painful for his Baba...and the other day I saw his Mamu wince..when he was given the same treatment....

His sweet Mamu however....said....well he is growing up..so what if it is by holding on to my body hair..... let him..lol.... his Baba however....was not so kind....

The husband's latest name for Joy is Partner....yes he is a big Govinda and Salmaan Khan fan...lol.....

Very often I find lil Joy sitting at his fathers feet and getting a "Listen Partner " talk..with his Baba telling him a few facts of life..... and my darling Joys answer is always the same...."pppffffttttssss" with drool all over his face..at the end of the lecture...very cute..am going to capture it on video as soon as I can....

Joy also now refuses to be carried... he has to be let down on the floor and then he just rushes all over the place crawling like a maniac....yanking things off their shelves... his favourite spot is his Ganga Mashis puja area..... the poor gods are always in the danger of being toppled over....

He is babbling all day... most of the sounds are Baabaa....and naanaa...but still no Ma..or Maamaa....am still waiting...

Some pics :

Joy after toppling over Ma's bangles

Joy sitting in his stroller on a visit to San Marzano for lunch

Potter mania....

To make things clear even before I write my post.... I Don't read Harry Potter...I never have ..and I don't think I ever will.....



Ok!! So everyone knows my stand... If you don't agree please don't read further....If you are ok with it..read on.....



So..as I said..I don't read Harry Potter...I must admit I tried...it was difficult not to when the only other person you live with goes into a self imposed "coventry" ....So not being too much of a TV person and coz I love to read ..I tried to read one of the previous books.....couldn't go past page 27....May be I just don't get this genre of fiction .....or whatever.....I Don't read Potter....



After marrying the husband... I learnt that there were somethings we had to do together.... I mean if he could accompany me to watch "Maid in Manhattan"( quite a bad choice on my part I know)..I could go with him and sit through a few hours of Potter.....So since 2003 I have watched every Potter movie made....and have forgotten what I saw the minute I walked out of the theatre....

I have had to sit through hours of discussions and analysis and future predictions done by the husband and his Potter crazy friends....and wondered...what was so great about this little specky guy..and his friends with weird names .....



This year, the husband asked his mother-in-law to give him the new Harry Potter instead of new clothes for Jamai Shoshti and she obliged....He booked it on one of those online stores who promise to have it delivered the same day it hit the stores and gave him some discount as well...anyways...I was quite amazed with all his planning....all for a Harry Potter.....!!!! Ok!! I go and pre order a few books I want to read as well... but that is only when the store doesn't have it in stock...and so I order and they get it for me....I wait till they do so ....



I have seen my young nieces and nephews and some cousins running to buy the books... I read about people who reached the stores at 4.30 am... I heard about some stores offerring breakfast options with the book...I saw pictures of people sitting outside stores all night waiting for the first copy.....and thought What total crap!!! What craziness....!!!!

The funniest was in school... now I teach a class of children in the age group of 5+....they can't even read.. they are just learning to read three letter words and understand blends....and i almost fell off my lil chair ...when during the Show and Tell session in class... there was a child who had brought his little scrap book on Harry Potter.....he lisped through the entire thing and called Harry Potter -Halley Poller...and Hermione...-HerLineOnly.....and Dumbledore....Duffelbore.......



Another kid brought a stick and tried to tell us that it was Potter's wand....and then the worst of all.... one kid...wanted to tell us a story.... and so I said..."sure darling....whats the story called....?" and..yes... you guessed right...it seems.. the story was called Harry Potter and the deathly hallows......it seems his Dad ..had some how gotten the book online...and read it ...and then gone on to regale everyone at the dining table about the new Harry Potter story......



Now....I am all for parents spending quality time with their kids... reading to them ..telling them stories....playing with them.. taking them for trips...even if it is to the bookshop( I encourage that actually..we take Joy to the bookstore almost every weekend.. so what if he can't read..(hell..he can't even talk as yet) there are lots of lil books with bright picutures on them.. and we pick up something for him... which his ma can read to him...).....anywhere....do whatever ..as long as your kid and you have a good time... but these kids are not even 6 ..spare them please....at 6 years of age.. I don't want my kid asking me what deathly hallows means....or what prisoner means I am sure there are better stories for them to hear.... let them grow up and read Potter if they want to....



Anyways... the husband made me stay home the whole of yesterday...waiting for the package to arrive.... and called every hour to find out if it had...or whether I had gone off galavanting...lest his precious courier would have to face a closed door....then when he realised that no package had been delivered..he called up the online bookstore and threatened them with dire circumstances....

Well..we are still waiting for the book......I am glad... it hasn't come yet...coz.. I was trying to prepare my self for a weekend with out the husband... who had begged to be left alone for a day and a half...... so that he could spend it with Harry.......so yippee.... we got the weekend....!!!!



For all those who think I am insane to not like Potter..or understand the mania... please ignore this post...and spare me any

Tenth month birthday

I forgot to do a post on Joy's tenth month birthday..... I have no excuses ...I suddenly remembered that I had forgotten... sorry my darling.....

Your ma may have forgotten but two people didn't .... your D'shona and your Nammi...

I came home on the 6th to find Joy playing with his D'shona who had come to spend the day with her Grandson...She came like she usually does ....aka.. Santa Claus..... she got some bath stuff for Joy....Three huge packets of wipes for me to use.....two new T shirts for Joy and some other stuff for our house..... since when did we also get presents for Joys month birthdays...we don't know... but we have realised that there is no point in arguing...so we don't ..and just accept everything and anything...

Joy's Nammi this time did something different as well... instead of her usual poem..she sent some prose....

"Our Little Love - on your 10th month b'day let me explain to you the "Power of Ten"
........... Thus begins your journey to be within 10, because yardstick of all competitions in life is measured from 1 to 10. We hope you shall not be forced to join the race for competitions. Grow to be a cool dude & we know you'll surely remain within 1 to 10 wherever necessary. Our prayers are there.....................................

Nammi - Dadabhai"

crisis # 2

I had just written about the first crisis after I started work.... that was Joy related...... well..... am two weeks into work and am also in the midst of crisis # 2.....

I got the viral fever....

Yes ...its being doing the rounds all over...the part time maids seem to have it...my upstairs Aunty has it.....some kids in my class have it...some of the teachers have got it... some of the husband's colleagues have it ...everyone seems to have gotten it.... WELL!!!!!! I definitely have .....

So,.... I am sick....have a heavy feeling in the head...feverish..temperature the last time I checked was 102 degrees.....body ache is tremendous and my throat feels as if it is going to burst...can hardly swallow.

I couldn't go to work on Friday....was in such a bad shape..... went to see the doc ..who refused to give me any antibiotics.... and told me to have patience and bear the viral out.....so that was that...I have been surviving thanks to a combination of crocin and combiflam and a betadine gargle..... so every 6 hours when the medicine starts wearing out .... i start to feel sick and disgusting again ...and then after a fresh dose am a little better.....I hate it when I am sick..... and since I am not sick that often....I hate it even more...

I was a little worried about Joy getting the viral.... but was told by the doc...that he would get it anyways and if he doesn't then I should count my lucky stars.....There wasn't much I could do to prevent him anyways.... he was at home with me....I was home the whole day....and he was all over me.... despite my shutting myself up in my room there is only so much you can do when there is a lil someone banging his lil fists on my door and screaming his lungs out.....

Anyways I have to go back to work on Monday and I hope I feel better by then.... and I hope and pray that neither Joy nor the husband get the viral from me.....its horrible..... and if they do....I will have to live with them and nurse them back to good health....I don't know which is worse..being sick or looking after someone who is sick.....specially if it is my shona baby..my lil Joy....

We are moving

The husband and I got married in Jan 2003...and now have been married for almost 4.5 years.....in these 4.5 years we have moved 4 cities.....

First stop for us was Bangalore....we were there for a year and a half and then Hyderabad for a year and then Mumbai for 5 months.....and the last one being Delhi for the past year and a half......
It's become a standard joke in the family about our frequent moves and whether or not we shall be in the same place long enough for people to visit us a second time.... we have grinned and borne the brunt of all these jokes....

Each move for us has been a better posting or opportunity for the husband ...both financially and professionally...... and me... I get a job in each city before we can even finalise a house...lol....so we haven't had much of a problem.... we have gotten used to the shifting to such an extent that we even know the packers and movers numbers for each city...and what kind of packaging material would suit us best.....etc...

The reason why I am writing about our moves all over the country is because we are all set to move again..... this time not all the way across the country...but yes all the way across the border to Gurgaon.....
The husband's office is moving there by December and the husband has always maintained that he would prefer to live close to work....he hates commuting.....Now if I hadn't gone back to work.. I would have told him that he would have to do the commute cos there was no ways I would move.... But now that I have started work and my work place also happens to be in Gurgaon.....it just makes sense for us to move....
There is no point in each of us commuting .....in which case we would both spend less time at home and with Joy....so in this case.... we should move just to make matters easier for all of us...

We are now doing the rounds of brokers and apartments and everything.... with the hope of finding something suitable by September.
If anyone knows of any apartments going for rent in Gurgaon please do let us know.....

My school is in a very central part of Gurgaon and has some very nice residential complexes around it....so our main aim would be to find an apartment in one of these complexes....This would mean my commute time would be almost zero.... I could leave for work at 8.10 am and be home by 2.45 pm.....what more could one ask for ....????

I have a cousin who lives in one of these complexes and her two lil boys are Joys best friends.....so I know he will have a great time.... My cousins maid and mine are friends as well...so that solves two problems.... two important people who need to adjust well to the move....My son and the maid....


The husband and I were just talking about what all we need to get done before we move...and the list reminded us of our earlier moves..... we called some packers and movers today.....surveyors should be visiting us soon.....so yes we have set the ball rolling.....

My mum has been very supportive....despite knowing that my moving away would mean that she wouldn't get to see her darling grandson everyday.....she has been telling everyone she meets who ask her why we were moving and how both she and my great grandmother would miss out on Joy and stuff....that she supports our move.... she keeps talking about my in-laws who get to see their grandson only on and off.... and that she was lucky to have had us near her for so long.... plus Gurgaon was only an hour away..and she would see us on weekends and holidays etc.....
She has been a darling....and has been all positive about the move...specially happy that I was back at work and that I would now be close to home as well..

Anyways... we are moving.....so anyone in Gurgaon ..please get in touch ....and let me know if there are some nice apartments going ok....

crisis....# 1

Today I completed a week of being back at work... and didn't have a problem with the waking up..Joy grinned at me as I left... everything seemed cool.....

Joy and I woke up at 5 am.. and we cuddled and played for sometime... till he found the maid more interesting and went off for his tour of the house... and his Surya pranaam...( yes !! she makes him do it everyday... I was quite amused to see him in her lap looking at the little idols with a mischevious grin ..but with his pudgy arms and hands folded....lol)...and I was left to my cup of tea and the newspaper...

On sunday, the husband and I had noticed a small mosquito bite on Joy's hand... and had dismissed it as just another one... ( we had been told the previous week.. that junior was allergic to mosquito bites....after we had taken him to the doc...with some really bad bites which were looking really scary...however, Joy was as cheerful and did not seem to be affected by these bites....)..so we just put some of his ointment and went about with our normal activities...

This morning... Joy was at his energetic best...he was grinning, laughing loudly crawling all o ver the place ...nothing unusual and amiss.... so i kissed him and went to work..... before I had even reached work... I get an sms from the husband... telling me that Joy's hand is swollen.... but he was absolutely normal.... so i should get back home and take a call about the doc...

So naturally I was a little worried... I called home and was told by the maid that he was wrestling wih the cook and I should relax...and come home at normal time... but yes the hand was a swollen.

I got back around 4 pm....and saw Joy all excited and normal... yes his hand was still swollen.... So I took him into meet his old pediatrician.... hoping he would be at the hospital that day.... He was.. and was quite thrilled to see us.. especially Joy... he examined the hand and also agreed that my darling was allergic to bites.... and these would cause inflamation sometimes.... he would however not be in any kind of discomfort.....

Anyways medicine was prescribed and the next morning Joy was fine....

That night the husband and I were looking at our sleeping son and chatting.... I asked him a question that had been niggling in my mind since this had happened....

I had not till that time been worried about going back to work.... and asked him if this was a sign.... or something..... thank fully he looked at me .. and told me that I was just getting worried.... Joy was fine and that I had taken the right decision.....He was happy that I was back at work.... and quite happy to have me telling him about my day ... which was not just about diapers and potty and baby food....

Joy and I are loving our time together....in the mornings and the evenings..... I keep going into the nursery section in school... its right next door to my class... and look at the lil ones.... they seem to be having a ball...and think of Joy....

I love this school.... and love the methods they use.... the kids are so happy ...I can't wait for Joy to come to school with me as well....

But that is still a couple of years plus a lil more away ....... I think....

Back to work....

Have been missing in action for a while......and I am guilty......whenever I have a few minutes to my self..... I can see my computer beckoning me....but the temptation to curl up and go to sleep is just too much to handle...... so sorry my dearest blog..... I will write..but not as often as I used to....

One of the main reasons for being irregular is coz now I am back to work.... yes I joined work yesterday....It's been two whole days and AM LOVIN IT!!!!!

I have been dying to go back to work ...for my own sanity and have written about it a few times as well... now that I am back at work..... I have no regrets...

The past few weeks have been quite crazy coz I had to prepare my household and my sweet son for those few hours that I wouldn't be home for...

Actually for the past few months I have been slipping out by myself.... for a coffee ...to meet a few friends....to a book shop.... out shopping ....something.... or the other.... I would be gone for a few hours and would be back in time for Joy's meals.... he would either sleep or be playing with his toys ...or supervising the household chores.. which he loves... LOL!!!!

I needed those few hours to myself....then....to be in a pleasant mood for the rest of the day..... Now that am back at work....it is tiring .. but am happy....

I have set a routine for Joy ...I firmly believe that kids thrive in a routine... and with Joy atleast it has worked out very well....

The husband and I have from day 1 been quite firm about what time he should sleep and he should eat his meals...his bath time ..his park time.....his play time..... every thing....and so much so .. that initially if we extended any particular scheduled activity... Joy would get cranky and be difficult to handle...

As he is growing up some of the timing we maintained have gotten extended ...but those are only natural and a part of his growth process ....but by and large he still sticks to routine....

Anyways... I had set a routine for Joy and we had been following it for the past few weeks to see how it would work out .....

The past two days with me at work haven't been a problem so far....am keeping my fingers crossed.XXXXXXX

However, I have to be thankful for the fabulous help I have...

I crib about them from time to time...hell even I am human.... but well.. if it wasn't for them.. I may not have gone back to work....

Joy wakes us up as usual at 5 am.... but now both the husband and I wake up and spend time with him.... after his diaper is changed .... he is now welcomed back into our bed to play and snuggle with us .. unlike earlier where he was sent off with the maid.....

The at around 7.15 am... I slip out while ..he is being fed his breakfast...... After his meal he spends time with his Baba.... and sees him off.at 8.30 am.. like he used to ...do with me...

The maid then makes him go to sleep.... for his morning nap..Joy sleeps at this time for about an hour and a half.... after which he is given his bath.....and then fed his mid morning snack.... which he loves and looks forward to...

My cook cum cleaner comes around this time...and keeps an eye on him while he does his work...and then is around for an hour.....

Joy then plays with the maid and does his dushtumi... all over the house....

At around 12 noon.... he is fed his lunch...after which the cook comes back to play with Joy ( also to give my maid a break)...till he falls asleep..for his afternoon nap.... this is also usually for an hour and a half.. and sometimes if we are lucky.....it stretches for two hours as well....

By this time its almost 2.30pm...... Even if he does wake up and play for a while.... or is fed a small snack of a biscuit .. at this time.... before he knows it I am home.... I get back around 3.30 pm.... and then after resting a while... I play with him and take him to the park around6 pm.....

The husband usually picks us up from the park or my mothers house.. where we go and pay my grandmother a visit every evening.....

I am enjoying my work... the change in my life....

as my sweet mother-in-law smsed me this morning.....

"All the best for the new job..... you are now starting a new and doing two of the most important things that women do best....teach...and the other is being a MOM.....You will be good at it like you are good at being a mother..."....Amen to that!!!!!

He is a growing boy

How does that jingle go....

"He's a growing boy.... look how he's shooting up"..

"He's a growing boy....( i have forgotten the words....)..nananana...nanana"....

You guys know what I mean na???

Every few weeks , the maid and I sit and sort out Joy's closet...he outgrows his clothes every two weeks... and if it isn't that ... the weather changes and we need a change of clothing then....

Joy has been very lucky ..as I keep mentioning through out my blog.... all our aunts and other relatives...( both the husbands and mine) keep showering us with gifts for Joy...they come with bags of clothes for him.... the lil kiddo is only 9 months and owns 5 pairs of jeans...( a pair of light blue Levis, dark blue Next,blue- black acid wash, grey with red piping and black ) he has been wearing these from the age of 3 months and has them as of now right up till the age of 2.....( by the ways .. I checked.. The husband has two pairs of jeans and I have three .. which still makes his count more than ours)

Anyways... we keep going through all the clothes we have for him and changing his closet ..... yesterday ..we sat and aired all his trousers... yes he has four of those.. in beige, deep blue, moss green and black.... We had put these away for the past two months due to the intense heat... there was no way he was going to wear jeans in that weather.... but now that its quite pleasant in the evening ... I pulled them all out....

Joy all dressed up in his sandals, beige trousers and white Tshirt... all set to go out shopping with Ma

Joy looks quite cute now... we dress him up for the evening.... irrespective of where we are going and what we are doing in the evening... he is dressed up... and this usually means... full pants or jeans and a smart shirt or T shirt ... if its a lil nippy then he wears a basket ball jersey...

During the day ..if we are at home... he lives in his collection of 50 sleevless thin vests... some white ...some in different colours with cute slogans and his diaper....if someone comes home we slip on a pair of shorts over his diaper...

All this shifting his closet around also means that we have huge amounts of clothes that now don't fit him.... causing a HUGE storage problem for me.... after all I only have so many box bed and lofts...right....

so now we have another task to do.. we sit and sort out those clothes we think we might use incase I have baby number 2( my maid is very hopeful..and keeps keeping things I discard away...saying..."aar ekta to hobe..") these are the really nice ones....I hope all those people who gave Joy so much will do the needful for Baby no.2 as well...so those clothes we keep aside.. dryclean, or wash and sterilize and then get vacuum pressed and stored into the box beds.. and then some I give away to the help at my mum's place and also my maids to take home with them to give to family members having babies.....some the ones which are too good to give the help... I ask my friends with babies younger than Joy...if they would like to use them... and send them off...etc.... but its quite a task and every two months I have to do this....quite cumbersome.....

Here is another one of him.... He looks so cute...

Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain

A few days ago... it rained...... it was beautiful... Joy loves the rain...and this time I took him out to the balcony and stretched his little arms out so that he could feel the raindrops falling on his tiny palms....

He was amazed when the first droplet splashed on tiny hand.....I carried him from balcony to balcony... I have four.. and we reached out for the rain... we stuck out our faces and felt the cold rainwater splash off our faces.... Joy had the expression he has when his Baba holds him under the shower...he was thrilled...then he tried to lick the rainwater off his hand.... I let him.... knowing that that water wouldn't be very clean..... it came off the terrace ledge afterall... but what the hell....!

Joy watching the rain from his balcony

We got wet.... then after we dried ourselves nicely.... Joy and I sat in his room with the balcony door wide open... and saw the rain go pitter -patter in front of us...the trees were all green..there was a nice breeze.....my maid brought me a cup of hot tea and Joy his sweet lime juice to sip on... and followed it with a plate of pakoras....and some marie biscuits for Joy....I sat with him in my lap...and sang a few "rain" songs....in English and Hindi.... the maid also got inspired and joined in with a few "monsoon" songs in Bengali... Joy just sat and listened....and smiled...and clicked his tongue...( he's learnt how to do that..some how...)

We sat like that for almost an hour... me sitting on the bean bag just looking out .....humming a few songs and Joy playing with his new toy....every now and then crawling out on to the balcony ..getting his hands wet and crawling back with a naughty look on his face....I loved it ....

Joy playing with his new Toys

Both of us missed the husband.... that kind of weather is his favourite.... I looked out and thought of him sitting inside an office working .. sometimes he doesn't even realise that it had rained... poor guy....

We missed you sweetie.... but there will be more like that one.........

Jamai Shoshti

In Bengal, there is a tradition of something called Jamai Shoshti, where the son-in-law is fed special food and given gifts. On this day elders usually give the younger ones new clothes as well...

For the past four years, since our wedding, the husband and I have been away from my mother, hence ..she hasn't been able to do the needful personally. Usually , The husband and I have gone out to dinner at some fancy place and my mum's instructions would be to bill it to her. She would also send us new clothes and stuff...

This year we were in Delhi, so the day before, Mum arrived and gave Joy and me gifts, Joy got a blue checked shirt and I a lovely white and blue salwar kameez. When I asked about the husband, ma told me that they had already spoken... and he had requested her not to give him yet another set of clothes , but a book instead..... so she was very happy...( The husband and my mother are made from the same mould) The husband has gone and prebooked his copy of Harry Potters next... the number.....I can't remember....am not into it...

She then informed me that we should all be ready the next day for breakfast... it seems she had discovered this new breakfast buffet... and that would be her Jamai Shoshti treat....

So the next day, when the husband saw his son looking debonair in his new clothes... he went and found an outfit similar to his sons.....

Don't they look adorable....

Father and son team up in cool blues and khakis

Joy and me also dressed in new clothes

We went to C.P. so that the husband could go to work after breakfast and my brother would bring us all back....

For all those Delhiites.... who remember the old Nirulas in C.P.... well it closed down some time back.... and I was one of hose people who was quite sad ..when I heard ..It used to be our regular hangout after college.... we would go and share one HCF ( Hot chocolate fudge) between the four of us.... it used to be expensive back then.... around 50 bucks... and am talking ten years ago.....as students the only ways we could afford it was when and if we shared it .....

Anways, the good news is that it has reopened...it's in the outer circle just at the point where KG marg hits CP , above Amber Restaurant.....Its all new... open and airy... very nicely done up.... its got all their five separate eateries all under one roof.....called Nirulas Pot Pourri .

The other day we had tried the lunch salad buffet.....

I tell you ten years ago,, it used to cost Rs.105/- ...once about five years ago.... when I had been there the salad buffet had gone up to rs.120/-...I often usd to wonder why they couldn't increse the prices properly....( the were following the Petercat model...according the husband... where the price of the famouse chelo kebab had gone up from 80 bucks to 105 bucks over ten years....)

Anyways, it seems Nirulas Pot Pourri had started a breakfast buffet... and as a family we prefer breakfasts.. to any other meal....so it seemed ideal for the Jamai Shoshti treat.

It was fabulous.... the food amazing, Joy behaving himself.... the weather good.... and we all spent quality family time together after quite sometime.....which was wonderful....

Thanks Ma for the lovely Jamai Shoshti treat.....

Thakuma's out of her bed!!!!

Three days ago, I got a call from my mother....Thakuma, my fathers mother, had been taken out of her bed ,( she had been bed ridden since last December) and was sitting in her wheel chair....in the garden.... I felt tears go down my face....

I had been hoping to hear this news for ages....and was so happy.....

I rushed over with Joy armed with my camera to capture the occassion.

Look at Thakuma with Joy on her lap.... both of them admiring my mother's new lush green lawn...

Thakuma and Joy

Walker Woes

Every site I read on parenting has a different take on whether or not we should use a ''walker" to help the baby learn to walk...

Hmnnn... I read a lot ... and mentally decided to 'try' not using one... the husband and I had sort of taken this decision from stories we had heard as well as personal experiences....

The husband it seems was given a walker and when his grandmom and mother saw the contraption... they fainted... so they took photographs and then packed it up and kept it deep inside the loft.... lol...

I had grown up hearing stories about my cousin sister who used to go "whoosh" all over the place and then crash into things and fall over due to the thingy being very very unstable...

So...we said... "na..thaak"....

But after five days of running after Joy and him crawling into and under everything...we said .. maybe we should give it a try... at least it will have a radius.. and it will prevent him from lunging at some things at least.....and we won't have to hold on to him all the time... and he won't be able to go under things....

So , I called a cousin of mine who had offered to give us her son's old one.... now, this cousin.. is very particular about what her sons' use.. so I was sure she had bought a walker after properly researching the market... and sure enough.... its a great one... and even the husband .. after seeing it said .." Well! it looks very stable... unlike the one I had "

So , the walker arrived.... Joy took one look at it and gave us a toothless smile followed by a "Whoooooop!!!!! and Wheeeeeee!!!!!!" We too looked down at him with fondness ..thinking maybe we had done the right thing..... look how happy he is with it....maybe it will be good for him..he will learn to walk and explore....

That was one of the biggest mistakes we ever made... or one can call it our naivety.....I say.... we were idiots....!!!! Some one rightly told us that at each stage you think it can't get worse than this... but you are wrong... when the next stage happens... the previous one seems so so so peaceful....

Earlier , Joy would go under things and get into things... now he goes over them.... and around them....

Earlier , Joy would be crawling around ....so we would have to keep bending down to pick him up or help him stand up..... Now we have to look out and save our toes.. coz he goes over them.....and also we dont have to help him stand ..he is standing....

Earlier, he could not reach a few things.... but now.. he CAN....he can now open drawers, he can yank the table cloth off the table...with all the cutlery and crockery on it...

Earlier , my dressing table was safe.... now it isn't....nor is my nice-pretty drawing room.....and all the crystal...( thank god the drawing room has a door separating it from the rest of the house... so now it is out of bounds for Joy)

Earlier the fridge was off limits for him.... now he doesn't care...

Here is a pic of him openning the fridge door and examining what to chuck....

He did chuck the bread out... Thank god ! The eggs compartment was still a little too high for him..

Initially , he was a little unsure about manouvering the contraption.... but now he has mastered it.... he is still making a break for it .. whenever he sees the balcony door or the main door open....only difference being.... now he's gone in a flash... so if we thought the time when he would crawl and make a break for it ... bad.. it has just gotten worse...much worse....

I have been warned that it will become crazy when he starts walking.... I don't even want to think about it.....

Cornered in the walker

Fathers Day 2007 - a first for the husband and lil Joy

Sunday was Joy and his Baba's first fathers day.

Joy woke his Baba up early in the morning with a lil present and a card for him... but I think the best present he could have given his father was what he did at that moment. He looked at his father and said "Ba-bba"....gave him a grin and proceeded to climb over him and try and yank at his hair.

My heart strings moved .... my eyes went a bit watery...I think the husbands went the same way too... he won't admit.. but I know...

Joy gave his Ba-bba a smart Van Heusen white linen shirt and two pairs of socks.. the latter was added when we found that he needed a few more socks.. LOL... and a very cute card.... I checked Ba-bba has put the card away safely in his drawer... along with a few more... like.. The card I sent him before we got married, the ones I gave him after we got married and some other letters or sweet notes I wrote him..as well as the one Joy gave him for his birthday..... so sweet... I tell you I like men who have a slight emotional streak in them....

That doesn't mean I need my man to be metrosexual or whatever it is they are calling them now... I like them to be men... I still have problems with men advising me on what make up to buy, or whether I should wear pink or yellow.... or those who fix up monthly facial appointments.... puh-lease..!!!!!

As I said... I like men to be men.... they don't need to come shopping with me... if they want to sit and watch formula 1.... let them... I will go and watch a mushy movie... instead... If they want to hang out with their guys friends once in a while... let them.. they are entitled to it.... after all I too go off to meet my girlie friends and talk rott....

I once met a guy who was this total stud... but when I heard he fixes up facial appointments two months in advance and has a set deal with a leading mens salon for his weekly manicures and pedicures.... and also his face wax session.... I am sorry....I forgot how hot he was..actually I think I forgot him!!!

Ok! before people jump on me for being so stuck up and not cool... well.... Ok... men should take care of them selves .. not for beautification... but for personal hygenie purposes... keep your nails clipped and under arm hair trimmed...shave ... take a regular bath... use a good deo... do whatever.... but weekly appointments.. and face wax... good lord..!!!!! take a hike...

Ok!!! so going back to what I was saying about men being men .. but with a slight emotional streak.... The husband is one such guy....

He is ever willing to help out with Joy, clean up after his son, change diapers at all hours, try and walk his son to sleep....etc. I have already written a number of posts about how good a father he is ... you can read them all over my blog. He is the most wonderful son-in-law...so much so... my own mother prefers to talk to him rather than me....He is also a very good son.. very close to his family....respects his elders and from what I have seen they value what he says and since he is the eldest amongst his cousins he is also the best Boro Dada one could ever ask for. I shall not again talk about how wonderful a husband he has been and is till date .. 'coz I have already done that earlier... and ahem!! there is no need to give him too much "bhaav"....

Anyways coming back to what we did on Fathers day....

It was the most idyllic day ever.... the kind I love... we spent the entire day together ..just the three of us... We got up early as we were woken up with Joy and his "Ba-bba"..... then the husband and I went for our usual morning walk... the weather was lovely..so it was very nice. We then had a nice and lazy breakfast, gave Joy his bath and set off for Lodi Gardens..Joy loves this park.... since the weather was great the entire place was green and shady... the birds were chirping and there were quite a few dad's spending time with their lil kids... which I found very cute.....after a nice walk around the park ...we headed for Khan Market... I love that place.. its so nice and each lil corner has some hidden treasures ... like Mrs. Kaurs Cookies shop ( am now a fan for life), The Sugar and Spice Bakery which has the most amazing cheese and cold cuts along with their delicious baked goodies, Khan Chachhas for the best kathis, Chonas for good old chinjaabi... and The Big Chill cafe.... not to mention all the Anokhis and Fab Indias and Good Earth and The Home Store..and well I could go on and on.....

Anyways the idea was to try out this place called the Rampur Kitchen.... which it seems according to the HT city eating out guide... had amazing Haleem and Mutton raan and stuff... so us being us... we headed there.... lol... we went around and around... and never found it.. then on asking... we were informed that it had shut and in its place was this ultra cool Cafe Zaffiro... which looked very good.... but when I looked in... I saw lots of foreigners hanging around and also lots of smoke... so since we had Joy with us.. it was a no-no... the husband was quite relieved as well.. coz while I was peeping inside.. he was reading their menu which was up on a black board outside.... it started off with Organic Pineapple salad and mushrooms tossed in herbs and fresh veggies.... I don't think my meat eater husband read any further.... lol.

Anyways, we ended up at The Big Chill Cafe... and since we had reached early we got place quite easily and didn't have to wait at all.. And .....the food was to die for... we started off by sharing a cold cut platter... which was very very nice... and then shared a frilled fish in a Portuguese Piri Piri sauce which was devine.... Joy ate his lunch which I was carrying for him... sitting in his stroller.. and then once he was done nibbled on a few cauliflower florets while we ate....

We had no place for dessert... and headed straight home for a nice nap under the Razai.... Joy thank fully cooperated and slept as well... in the evening we went and visited my grandmothers.... yes both of them.... and then returned home to watch Tv ...and laze in bed till dinner time.... It was the most perfect day ever.....

Domestic help and my problems

I have just gotten back from discussing Domestic help ( maids) with a friend and came home to find that she had already posted on the same topic.... before our discussion... which now explains why she had that grin while I ranted and raved!!!!! hmnnnn!!!

After reading it I just had to write... I tell you... sometimes.. these people just drive me mad...

I have a full time live in maid.. who is usually pretty good.... she is neat and clean and is very affectionate towards my son and has been with me from when I was four months pregnant and took very good care of me.. Due to all this I also know she is a good person....I usually don't make a fuss over everything she does...I check her if she doesn't do something right.... and I always do so in private... I do not do so in front of others and specially not the other help....

This does not however mean... that I will take all the rubbish and keep quiet....

When I was discussing this with my friend who has always had problems with the help....and I am usually the one who has to listen to her rants and raves and I always feel very sorry for her...managing a big house... two lil kids and a lot of crazy help....however.....this time I was fed up...

My maid... after she joined us realised that all the help employed with my family....even extended family have been there for ages... once they join.... they rarely leave.... they are a very well looked after lot.... they earn well.. they are tipped very frequently....thanks to all of us having innumerably guests all the time.. we look after their medical bills and also loan them or gift them money in their times of need. We have people over frequently for dinner and I usually ensure that she eats by around 9 pm.. cos sometimes our parties carry on till very late and there is no set time for dinner.. so why make them wait while we enjoy ourselves ?

We even don't make differentiations regarding the food they eat.....they eat what we eat... now in a number of places... they eat leftovers... and their rice and atta is made separatly.... in our family no such thing is allowed... we eat basmati... they do too.. we eat pillsbury atta they do too....some people say we spoil them.... well maybe ... but then again...its worked ok for us....

The maid at my mums house.. now buys... tea and rice from here and takes it along to her village when she goes on her annual leave... according to her .. now she can't get used to eating the thick rice they eat in the village... so yes maybe we spoil them!!!!

Anyways.... I sometimes feel they also take us for granted.....

I usually ask the maid to take her food after I have finished my meal...and put away whatever is left after she finishes... yesterday..I forgot...to ask her...

This morning after breakfast ..when I asked her to clear the dishes and have her meal while I played with Joy....before his bath.....she comes up to me and with this very "naeka"look....tells me ... that she never ate dinner last night.... so I asked her why....and she said... that ..Just....

so I was like Ok... whatever... and kept quiet.... and got busy.... then when Joy was being fed his mid morning snack... she repeated her not having dinner story....so this time I again asked her why..and she said...coz I hadnt asked to eat the night before....

I blew my fuse... I was hopping mad....I told her... that if she expects me to ask her after every meal she is sadly mistaken.....she should have the brains to eat ...I have never stopped her or asked her to eat.....what the hell!!!!!

What got me even more mad was that she expected me to feel guilty... well I dont ....

She has been given a piece of my mind... and has been shown the door incase she is finding it difficult to take it.... naturally she started stuttering and stammering after that.....

ok ..so that was her!!!

The bit is ..now that I have come back and set up home close to my mums place.. a lot of the support staff are old timers.. they cook at mums and granny's and also come to my place and cook... it suits me fine... they are known people.. when I start work.. familiar people .. will be around Joy...for example the cook... he has seen me since the age of 15.... the grin Joy gives him everyday is priceless....he comes to cook at the crack of dawn and when I was looking for a cleaning person.. he volunteered saying that... I shouldnt let too many unknown people into the house... and that he would come and do the cleaning... so I was quite relieved...he is fabulous with Joy...He once told me .. he misses his own kids so much..he has two of them.. whom he sees only once every year for a month....so I feel sorry for him and let him drop in and play with Joy often...Joy knows him as Bharat Mama...

Anyways, the problem .with old timers... he doesn't listen to me most of the time.. If I have asked him to make a vegetable in a particular way he will cook it in the way he wants to....he sometimes doesn't come to cook and when I ask him the next day.. he turns around and tells me... "why? I cooked lots of food at nani's yesterday... there was a party... werent you all invited...? I thought you all were so I didnt think it was necessary to come here and cook...."..accha tell me....can't my grandmother entertain without us....? I found out later...that he does it with the others as well.. In case I have a party one day that day he conveniently bunks mums and nanis... I tell you he takes the cake... Then since he is the old timer... he bosses over all the other help... and sometimes.. gets them into trouble...by telling them what to do... when I have told them to do the opposite....

But he is a good soul so usually he gets a stern talking to... and everything is fine after that....

This friend also mentioned about how she was shocked when she saw some families who had come to a restaurant with their maids and didnt give them a morsel of food to eat..... I so agree with her.... I too have seen this happen very often and have always wondered .. why people do this...

The husband and I are so particular... if we go over to a friends place where we feel it will be helpful to have my maid along we take her... I always ensure that she eats her dinner before we go over.....If we feel we can manage with out her.. which is often.. we leave her home after all she also deserves some time off..

Till a month ago we had a driver... so since I was being chauferred everywhere I didnt need to take the maid if I went for a cup of coffee.. I could hold on to Joy...

Now we have let the driver off and I am driving my car... we didn't have a car seat for Joy all these days...so suddenly I found that I was stuck taking the maid everywhere I went with Joy.

One day I had to go to a Barista for a cup of coffee... the poor thing she heard we were going to this place... and took out her best saree to wear...I felt so guilty....I wasn't meeting anyone.. it was just supoosed to be Joy and me.. so I made her sit at our table and ordered her a cup of tea as well... poor thing she felt so out of place....but also was quite thrilled.. so I made it sound as if I had brought her here to show where her" babu" likes to come to have his Mango smoothie.. she had been hearing about this place...so I thought she should see it as well...

Anyways... the very next day.. I went out and picked up a car seat for Joy... and so now we can go out just mommy and baby without inconveniencing anyone and ourselves....

Comparisons

I was going through another fellow blogger's post on comparisons between babies....

Its a very natural thing....If I have an apple for tiffin.. and my friend has one too.. I will try and see if hers is redder ....If a friend of mine goes and buys a saree from the same shop where I bought my similar one.. I will ask her how much she got hers for... if it was more than I would feel satisfied... or quite thrilled.. and if it was for less I would feel cheated and upset....

So in otherwords..we always compare... either consciously or sub consciously...its human nature...

I have my mum and aunt breathing down my back nagging me about potty training Joy.. according to mum... I was potty trained by 6 months...or something like that.. and my brother was from day one... ( I don't believe a word of this... but whatever!!!) Whenever anyone sees Joy in his diaper.. they ask me..." he isn't always in a diaper ? is he?"

I honestly don't know why everyone is so concerned... Joy is our son.. we naturally have his best interests in mind.. and also are trying to do the best for him....

No he isnt potty trained..and Yes he is always in a diaper.. except for his bath time... so what....??

I have decided not to potty train him...

He will learn by himself...till then Diaper zindabaad...tellme honestly .. how many teenagers or even 10 year olds do you know who are not potty trained...or who crap in their pants.. ( sometimes mishaps happen.. hell they can happen to the best of us...)

Well if no one teaches them. they learn by them selves... off late a number of my friends have told me that their kids learnt themselves at around 2 years... thats fine by me... by the age of 2 .. a child can speak...by then hopefully and also therefore will be able to communicate their needs....I will just have to teach my child that the horriblly uncomfortable and squishy feeling that happens after potty is called Potty.. so they should either tell me before it happens.. or they will have to deal with the mess.. bas..I have a feeling one or two mishaps and they will figure it out by themselves...

The other thing... that keeps bugging me is this question...of why I keep my son in diapers all day.... well... Joy has got a rash just once touch wood..and that too only for a day.. he is 9 months old now... we change him frequently.. and now in summer I ensure that that frequency has increased...he is at peace and we are at peace.. I thought the keyword of the times... was Peace.. Man.... well so... yes!!! Peace Man!!!!

I have the whole world asking me if Joy has started teething....

well he supposedly started at three months... his gums turned white... I was asked to give him Calcera Phos...did that...I was made to buy hajaar teethers.. etc.... did that as well...rubbed clove oil did everything.... and yes he had started biting me like hell.... But.... no teeth..and still no teeth and he is 9 months old...

Now the husband and I aren't bothered...but..we have this couple who are friends.. and their sweet lil daughter is just 6 days younger than Joy... yes 6 days!!! and she has 2 teeth... and the third on the way... she started crawling before him... she ,I am sure will start walking before him as well...she even started sleeping through the night ages ago..... Joy is still problematic...

I sometimes compare Joy and this lil child.... and keep looking down at Joy with a worried look when he hasn't reached the milestones .. she has.... so I fret...sulk a bit.. get a little worried.. and then I come home and look at myself and feel like giving myself a shake... what is wrong with me!!!?????

Let Joy be.... he is a good healthy child... his doc assures me ..that he is doing fine( touch wood)....he hasn't fallen sick or had any such problems other kids might have at his age....( touch wood.. and I hope no lil kids are sick ever)......So why was I acting like a complete buffoon....?????????

Joy was fine....I had better chill....

I have taken a vow not to compare at all... I know... this vow will be broken everyday... but I shall try....

So all those of you who do the same... well... don't worry about it... its natural... and if we didn't have these lil faults... we would be GOD.... na??

We bought a new car!!!!

We had been planning on buying a new car for sometime now.... ever since Joy has been born.. all the paraphanelia... plus a maid and everything..... our sweet small car our Alto was just a lil too small...

What with the driver, Joy, the maid, me and all the stuff... the husband.. would either have to let driver off and drive himself.. or we would have to leave the maid home... which would mean... no peace for either of us... lol....

So.. now we have two cars... one a small car... which I use.. to run my errands and go meet up with my friends

and one a slightly bigger car... a sedan...its called the SX4....its the new Maruti Suzuki Sedan.. launched just over a month ago....

The last few months when we were contemplating about buying the car... and which one to buy.... have been quite entertaining.....

The husband and I are quite clueless when it comes to cars... ( ahem the husband is a mechanical engineer ... but doesn't know the front of a machine from the back of it ..) We were of the opinion that we needed a bigger car.... and by that we meant.... it should have a good boot...so that we could stow a number of things without having a problem... and that we could sit a little more confortably.... in the back seat....and that was that...

We had a budget.. and were hoping to stick within it....

..and then...? what happened...???

Well we suddenly found ourselves in the midst of major discussions and debates about which car should be bought by us....despite all the talk.... we in our minds had decided which one to buy....it was within our budget... it had good boot space..had good resale value...and did good mileage....

bas.. we were decided...

We were quite amused by the excitement and enthusiasm shown by our friends and family...three people most of all... one person was my brother... and the other was a close friend and her husband...and another friend... and this one... says she isn't excited by worldy possessions and such things and believes in a frugal lifestyle.. etc ..etc...

Anyways we went to test drive our chosen car... the Maruti Esteem...we drove it and found it convenient to manouver etc.. then the sales agent and my brother who had accompanied us.... casually asked us to also look at the new SX4 which had just been launched......

so we said... theek hain.. whats the harm....../?? ..... and we were bowled over....... not only by the looks but also by the feel.... one could not make out that the car was on..it was so smooth and silent.....

To be fair to our selves ..we decided to try out another car in the same segment.... the GM Aveo... we had ridden in it before...the husbands father and my uncle both have the Aveo... it was nice...So... we drove that one as well... but couldn't forget the SX4... we then realised we would have to increase our budget a bit... the husband tried to work it out and the biggest plus about the SX4 we found was that since it was a Maruti car it wouldn't be a problem to get spare parts replaced and service stations were all over....As a friend told us.. we could now safely drive upto Leh...lol!!!

Anyways.. the bottom line is that we have a new car.. we have the SX4... the husband is now a total convert.. he wont even drive the Alto unless its absolutely necessary.... and am glad.. coz.. I refuse to drive the SX4..I have decided I shall only be driven in that car.....lol... much to the husbands amusement...

Yippeee!!!! I am now mobile again....and Joy and I are all set to paint the town red....